Grim

I'm 32.

I vow to write more. I got into this mentality that there was nothing important enough to blog about. Uhhh this is "random thoughts and gripes"...by virtue it's supposed to be pointless.

However just to note...

1. It sucks when a spouse loses their job and you have a mortgage. Being a grownup sucks.

2. Someone I know lost their daughter today. I can't fathom what that must feel like. I really can't.

Being a grownup sucks.

3. Someone I grew up with (well, babysat) is getting a divorce...this shocks me, to me she's still a kid let alone someone who's married and ready to divorce.

Being a grownup sucks.

Yeah, grim and unfun. I'll write more upbeat bitching in days to come...right now I'm just sort of in awe of how, as a kid, you think being an adult is the best thing EVER.

Our 9-year-old selves were wrong.

I'm having a delayed quarter-life crisis

Yeah. I said it. 

I'm almost 32 and I realized that my quarter-life crisis has been at a slow and steady pace since I was around 28.

All this bitching, all this griping...it all makes sense now! Before I was merely an annoying chick who was never satisfied and felt the need to let the whole world know her complaints. BUT NOW...it has been solved! I've just been going through a crisis, but at such a slow pace that I didn't realize it.

At least men in their 40s and 50s wake up and buy cars. Sadly, I can't do that. And I actually like my car. In fact, I love Eleanor. She has been good to me. Eleanor, baby, I'm sorry I haven't washed you in like 2 months. I know baby. A car is a reflection of its owner, and right now I look pretty hygienically unsound.

So what's a girl to do when she realizes that she's gone though the stupid fun years of her life and doesn't know what to do as a grownup?

Oh sure...there's all the grownup things. Job. 401k. House. No...house PAYMENTS. Sending out way too many holiday cards in December on behalf of "us". Laundry. Proper nutrition. 

But there's a shift in mentality that needs to take place. I feel like each chapter of our lives is represented by an entrance. Well, I haven't crossed the doorway. I've just been chillin' on the front porch so that I can keep my eye on the door from my Oh Look Sweet Freedom I'm On My Own Now! This Is Going To Rock Years. It's like turning my head and charging through that doorway indicates that I should bet that person. The kind that in every year earlier in your life, you never wanted to become. The one who talks mortgages (already do), bills(already do), weather (already do), and politics (already do although I aim to be as ignorant as possible with the exception of socialized healthcare which i feel damn passionately about...wtf in the States we pay more per capita for healthcare yet the #1 reason for bankruptcy is healthcare costs. Ahhh my tangent...I'll bring it back in now).

Listen, I'm not gonna lie. I'm not cool. I've never been cool. I just want ONE opportunity to be cool and then I promise I'll turn my head from peering into that party house that represents youth. So what constitutes "cool"? We don't want to be the 32yo equivalent of the douchebag old guy who gets a new corvette, or even worse, a new miata.

Options include:

Tattoos

Everyone's got one now. So I think at this rate if I got one I become a crazy conformist. And it's just so...permanent. I have NOTHING on me that's permanent other than scars, and I desperately slather Mederma and prescription scar cream in hopes of one day miraculously waking up to flawless skin. Why am I paying to have that occur? Although...the cheesy "made in Canada" logo that people in Canada get would seem pretty nifty and different when you live in the States.  But still...getting a tattoo would make me feel like it's the body part equivalent of getting a miata (not for others...but for me, since it's so out of character). The whole point of why it was cool once upon a time was the pain factor combined with the stigma of doing something so ooohhhh "wrong" to your body in a permanent fashion. I'm sure there's plenty of nerds to tattoo "Hello World" or "void foo(int a)" so really...I'll pass.

Splurge on an expensive grownup purse

There comes a time in every woman's life when she splurges and gets that one designer bag she's dying for. Guys, don't even TRY to understand this. And lord knows, I've provided many a slobbery goo over the pretty things I've seen here in Orange County. But my paranoia exceeds my desire, and my fear of being robbed prevents me from ever starting a "nice expensive prettttyyy purse fund so that I can stop justifying why I have 25 non-designer bags that although they're cute and functional, it's just not the same". I don't think I would get robbed for the purse. I think I would just get robbed, period. Regardless if my purse were Hermes or Target, I can still get robbed. The last thing I want is to be negotiating with a robber "For real, take the CONTENTS of the purse. Take my wallet, take my cell. Just leave me my purse and my lipgloss. Please."

Get a whole new hair-do

Been there, done that. Spent forever feeling like Eva Longoria's ugly sister. While my hair still looks better, all it does is make me feel that I should have been visiting Henry the Stylist years ago.

Pursue a Master's degree

This falls under the "I don't know what I want to be when I grow up". Well the other parts of life that involve bills make this not so much an option (well, everything's an option. But the risks/consequences/stress aren't worth the potential outcome of it providing me with what I'd want). Plus I once looked up the whole thing of having my Canadian degree scoped out to see if it fits whatever requirements, and that just seemed like one big pain in the ass. It was 4 years of hell at horrific Ottawa U, I'd like to not revisit that past in order to attempt a future degree.

Plastic Surgery

Well I haven't had plastic surgery, but I did get a "cosmetic procedure" a few times. And it was AWESOME. Like...for real...I can't speak enough on the merits of injecting food poisoning into your face. God bless the team that used this for medical purposes only to discover their patients were lookin' mighty fine. Sadly it's a little hard to justify the cost vs. the frequency it needs to be done. Sigh. I've got syringes from my cat's insulin and plenty of meat I can let sit on the counter...can't I just scoop up some of the moldy goo, inject it into my forehead, and see what fun ensues?

So what's a girl with a delayed quarter-life crisis to do? 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Ha you thought I had an answer? Hardly.  Probably just a good ol' fashioned bitch slapping session with someone finally PUSHING me through that entryway into grownup world.

Facebook users, original link can be found here in case you care.

Purging whatever's in my brain

Some seriously random bitching and thoughts...leave your brain cells at the door as you read:

- has plastic surgery evolved so far that Dr. 90210 can fix my cankles?

- I finally got my stimulus check. I wasn't stimulated. My bank account will barely feel a heartbeat. It will get sucked into the vortex of all things going OUT of my account.

- speaking of $$, bask in my glory of having paid down my home equity loan $15k in 7 months (see the bottom of this blog page). Do you know how effing hard that was?! That's $15k EXTRA that went towards that effing loan. In addition to the regular loan, bills, and my right arm.

- I went to a baby shower on Saturday and there was a dude there who EXACTLY on the same pulse as me re: all the things that every single guy should be able to do. I was like, "hey so let's talk cars" and he replied "don't get me started, i have a friend who drives a purple jetta". That came after he said "well if me, my girlfriend and two of her friends went somewhere...then yeah of course i'm driving. Even if it means I have to drive my GF's car 'cause it's bigger". DUDE you're a shining star of what a single guy should be.

- According to 20/20, you can go an extra 40 miles on your reserve tank when the gas light goes on. For me, as soon as that light goes on, I freak out. Sweat starts to pour down my face and I act as if I've 30 seconds or else I'll start to sputter right in the middle of the road. I don't want to be the a-hole who's actually stalled in a middle lane on the HIGHWAY with her hazards on.

- When someone displays very bad etiquette to you, what's the proper reply? To call them out on their rudeness, or to still maintain your own level of etiquette, smile, and suck it up?

- It's 10:30pm at night and I'm craving strawberry shortcake. From Bigg's Deli and Bar in Ottawa. I want strawberry shortcake so effing bad right now. The last time I had it, I was at Cheesecake Factory. They served me two hockey pucks with artificial foam and a ghetto strawberry. Effing bastards.

I have more to write, but Kraig's doing the "how much longer are you going to be" schpiel so I gotta split. Stay tuned for part two of random rants on a Monday.

Purging whatever's in my brain – part 2 added the next day

Unless you're rocking the super long hair look (and really, I only one guy who can pull that off, Sebastian Bach from Skid Row), short hair on a guy is a MUST. That also includes when it grows all nasty on the back of the neck because you decided to wait a few more weeks before cutting. Ugh. Can't stand that. Short and preppy is the way to go (not to be confused with super SUPER almost shaved hair...unless you're playing sports all summer and need it that short for logistical reasons or you're in the military, please don't do that...chicks dig hair too)

after the age of 17, it is never ever cool to just make out at someone's house in front of people. Not the same as getting drunk in college, but no one's got a “house” in college (5 people renting one doesn't count as one person havint a house).

I'm wearing these super cute black shiny patent heels that are almost identical to ANOTHER pair of black shiny patent heels, except these ones have double straps. Which is how I justified getting them. They're crazy high and hurt like a biotch but DAMN they're adorable.

After a discussion with someone (who will remain anonymous to protect the innocent), I have to agree: really, REALLY, there's only one type of female that can pull of jean/denim skirts: super duper thin ones. Thus unless you're 12 years old...or you're 25 but weigh 90lbs, don't wear them. I've never owned one because I think they're actually ugly, but I also know that unless you're a twig, denim skirts ride up when you sit down and really, REALLY, i don't want to see anyone's underwear.

I think when people build buildings, they purposely eff up the A/C and heating systems so the employees have to suffer forever. I've never, ever worked anywhere where the heating/cooling situation was optimal. It's almost always set up so that one side of the building is forced to freeze while the other size drips in sweat.

Daphne's is so effing awesome. I want to bathe in their tzatziki sauce.

Diet Pepsi addiction is BACK. Bring on the jitters and the withdrawal headaches. And the teeth staining. Sigh. I'll go back to Fresca eventually.

I hate it when i see a guy who's calves are smaller than mine (I don't have small calves, but I expect every guy alive to have bigger ones than mine unless he's got cancer or something).

I love Trina Decker's hairstyle on Swing town:


I'm thinking if i cut my hair in the next short while, that's how I would do it.

That's right bitches!

Yeahhhh...take a look at the bottom of the page to the HELOC paydown...three digits! The goal was to pay down $15k in 2007, and it's almost done.

Not that it makes a diff...this was the recommendation of Countrywide last year (to pay down $30k of my home equity loan before the rest of the loan is set to switch over at the end of 2009, i.e: pay down 15k per year for two years). Realistically, I think I'd need to pay down another $70k if I had to refinance tomorrow.

So seriously, please...just everyone foreclose already! Get it over with! Let's get the worst of it over with.

In other news, I switched jobs again. As usual, not going to post details here but if you want to know the scoop, email me. If you don't know my email, then GOOD...I don't want no stalkers anyway!

A few seriously random thoughts:

- hummus from Daphne's is like magic in my mouth. It's mouth porn.

- I can't WAIT for the next iteration of America's Best Dance Crew. The last round was absolutely incredible.

- Diet Pepsi trumps Diet Coke all the way

- I'm so annoyed that Barrack Obama hand bumping his wife is actually considered a news-worthy story

- I fantasize on so many levels how much things would be better if I just won a $100k lottery. That's it. That's all I need. I'd LIKE more, but beggers can't be choosers, and $100k after taxes would be wonderful.

- I think I found a grey hair today. I was FREAKING out. I'm going to play ignorant until this weekend, then I'm going to go on a rampage. Getting grey hair is a million times worse than a wrinkle...it's like finding out you're in menopause. But at least menopause isn't displayed all over your scalp for the whole world to see how old you are.

Going to take a nap now. I actually get home at a decent time now where I can nap! Justin can bring sexy back, but I'm bringing napping back!

Of Life and Death

Today I went to a memorial-slash-life-celebration for a friend's grandmother up in LA. I guess I'm pretty lucky that in my life so far I haven't had to go to that many services (the only true funeral-type that I went to was for a friend's boyfriend in highschool, Bryan i know you know who i'm talking about, and that was just bizarre 'cause I just went to the wake which no one warned me i'd see a BODY...anyway...), so the times I do go I tend to get emotional pretty easily.

I can truly say this will go down in history as the best memorial service ever. Not so much because of the surroundings or the food or any of that (although I'm pretty sure they snuck some crack into their sandwiches, I seriously inhaled at least a dozen, and it was all absolutely gorgeous), but because everyone had so much to say and their comments showed what an absolutely incredible woman my friend's grandmother was.

The best part I think was the video interview my friend's sister put together shortly before her grandmother died, which is absolutely brilliant...this is now the perfect excuse for me to get a camcorder (side note: were they super expensive in the past? My parents made it sound like a camcorder was thousands of dollars. I went on Amazon and you can get a decent Canon or Sony handycam for under $400. Then again, my mom made the Pizza Hut buffer sound like a month's salary).

During the services I started to wonder...if I died tomorrow, what would people say about me? Or 60 years from now, what would I have done with my life that could possibly make people speak so fondly of me like they did for my friend's grandmother? If i died tomorrow, people would say "Oh, she knew her TV trivia. She had an obsession with pop culture. She could win Vh1's Celebrity Pop Culture challenge. She donated $20 to the Donkey Rescue charity in 2007. She had high anxiety about paying off debt."

Sad, very sad people. So I think I'd like to make it a lifelong goal to live in such a way that my actions will be meaningful to others, that I'll be remembered for more than the girl who freaked out when her interest-only-no-cash-down-house plummeted in value.

Hmmm, let's see how long THAT lasts....

Letter to the Editor

How much damage could $22 do to your credit rating?
I had a score of like 760, and it brought me down to like 500-something.

It makes a HUGE difference, my score is more sensitive than others because i'm already being dinged for only having a few years of credit history. Fortunately my score went back up with teh other credit bureaus after a few years, except for Experian.

It made enough of a difference that I couldn't get on the home loan when we refinanced...hence why i had to get it back in shape for the Big Refinance 2009.

Bryan: i owe you an email still, i know!

Deux Semaines et autres histoires fabuleux

I don't like posting job stuff up on my blog but since this is pretty major I might as well alert the masses...I gave my 2 weeks notice on Monday. I won't list the new job details here, but it's in Irvine and i'm gonna be a project manager...for a totally different industry. I'm pretty freaked, tech writing I could go anywhere and figure the stuff out pretty quickly, but this is a brand new world for me. Eep.

Anyway, that was one of my "goals" for January/February, which thus also means that I've sort of put my other monthly goals on the side 'cause seriously, interviewing wipes you out. All that smiling and being peppy and acting like you're the most fabulous person on earth...it's like your own Miss America pageant. You dont' think of the TRUE answer to give, you think of the RIGHT answer to give, what they want to hear, all while looking flawless and flashing yer teeth.

Interviewing results in a very cranky Sabina. I feel like I need to get extra bitchyness out of my system to even things out.

In other news, check out the very bottom of the page...yes, the year's goal of 15K paid down on the home equity loan is almost down by half...and it's only February. The only reason I was able to pull that off was 'cause a CRAPPY CD i got a few years ago (seriously, the rate was only like 3%) expired, and i hauled ass yesterday to the bank to make sure they didn't roll it over into another crappy CD. Feelin' good.

To top it all off, I've been griping for years now about one dumbass sorta-error on my credit report...a stupid $22 water bill...recap: I paid my utilities with my rent...and they claim they didn't get the payment, i tried to get a hold of my old apartment complex to get them to have my back. Turns out, it got bought out and underwent a condo conversion, no one anywhere had any record I existed or lived there. So, even though i eventually paid it as soon as I found out about it (although i'm sure i already DID pay it, damn apartment people), it's been a huge ding on my credit score ever since. Other than that, my score is flawless...the only thing stopping it from being 850 is that I don't have a huge credit history in the US.

ANYWAY...i've tried disputing it and it's gotten me nowhere...well 2 months ago I did my usual "hmmm wonder what's up in my credit score report these days" and bought my reports again...and only one of the three bureaus still shows that damn alleged delinquent bill. I decided to attempt to put the smackdown again and filed a dispute. Those mother effers don't make it easy, they only give you like EIGHTY characters to state your claim. That gave me one whole sentence to pretty much say "The original bill was paid through my rent cant get a hold of them for proof" or something retarded like that.

Well, long story short: I won! Finally! Experian saw in my favor. Oh happy day! That's been a pain in my ass for years.

Maybe I should buy a lottery ticket.

Another letter to the editor

Refinance Your Loan with the damn bank or lender...or whoever the f it is.

I think you have the (excuse me) balls to do this. And it works.
But WTH you can't lose.
Banks right now, and lenders, DO NOT want any more property. They can't handle it.
You walk in, get past the desk people and say you need to talk to someone with authority. Cry and tell them you are about to let the bank have your f-n house if they don't sit down and do some dickerin with you.
Take a picture of your home, tell them your ready to leave it with them and start all over.
Tell them you want some relief from this f-n mistake, that your upside down 70k or whatever and have to have some interest relief. Tell them your husband is against it, but you will leave him too. (This is a lie)
Walk in with a foreclosure sign, leave the picture with your phone number on the desk of the person you are talking to, and tell them you did not come to debate, you came to share your desperation and get some relief one way or another.
I gurantee you he will call you on your cell phone before you get home and say..let's talk. We don''t want your house.
(The further under water you are, the better it is for your bargaining power.)

Ummm yeah the flaw in your logic is that to do something crazy drastic i'd have to miss at least a single home payment...which I will never do.

And it's not like Countrywide doesn't have my income statements...we CAN afford our payments.

I also dont' want to get stuck in another crappy loan situation, which is exactly what people with bad credit (i.e. missed home payments) and foreclosures are getting in order to keep their homes and loans.

I have good credit.
I can afford my home...now...
My adjustable rate expires beginning 2010.
If i didn't have an interest-only loan i'd still be stuck paying principal, so that's what i'm doing now.
I'm not going to see if they'll call my bluff if I start missing payments (which would be necessary in your scenario for them to believe i'm in dire straits), scream i'm going to foreclose, then force them to give me another bizarro loan created only because of this crazy market.
People just need to hurry up and foreclose, so that other people can buy crazy cheap, and then things will even out. It's this slow awful death that's ruining things.
I'm not upside down in anything yet...i'm not selling, i'm just hoping to make it easier to refinance.

I would sooner beg my aging parents for money AND my mother in law before I ever miss a home payment.

I posted this here instead of in the comments section 'cause I started to write so much I figured it deserved a blog entry :)

Letter to the Editor

So with all the rate cuts there is no way you & Kraig could refinance into a better loan situation?

Nope, that's why I have to pay down my HELOC loan asap...our loan-to-home value is crappy (at least before it had gone up a little bit, the last home that sold with roughly the same floor layout was $70K less than what we paid). So...no refinancing and locking in a rate until I pay down the home loan. I wish I could refinance! I wouldn't have that damn ticker at the bottom of the page.

So the goal isn't to get into a "better" loan situation...i just want ANY loan situation that would be a fixed rate, which isn't going to happen at all with the current snapshot of our mortgage.

They're alot more strict about giving out refinanced loans...Carrie i'm sure can attest to that (she still had to jump through hoops and her home didn't go down at all and she's got perfect credit).

I just need to win the effing lottery.

HELOC paydown status

Yee haw! Check out the very bottom of this blog...over 1/3rd of teh paydown goal completed! Plus I realized that I also need to start saving up well in advance for our property taxes (trying to scramble and pay off a $6000 property tax bill last minute is no easy task!) so there's 1/6th of that is put aside now as well.

Damn you crappy housing market...I will not go down without a fight.

Countrywide gets boned by BoA!

Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
This news totally shocked me.

Most of my banking is done through Bank of America...and my home loan is through Countrywide. So you'd think I'd be cool with this, but I'm not...I like BoA because they're everywhere (to canadian folks: if you remember in our OAC economics class they taught us that anyone can open a bank in the US, it's not like in Canada where there's just like 5 banks and thats it other than credit unions...so you could have a bank with only like 2 locations) and because their online bill paying is absolutely fantastic.

That being said, i also can't stand BoA for the same reason I can't stand 24 Hour Fitness: they're the McDonald's of Banks. I would never want my home loan through them.

Well, I guess COuntrywide had to bend over and take one for the team. The article says:
Bank of America said it initially plans to operate Countrywide separately under the Countrywide brand, with integration occurring no sooner than 2009.

I just need them to not f*ck around with Countrywide too much till the end of 2009 when I have to refinance. That's all I ask. I love my loan dude (Gina's ex husband), I really like the communication, etc...please please PLEASE don't eff me over....

In other news: TGIF!

Money, costco, jobs, and bling

So did some web surfing crap and came across this:
Job-related stress is extremely common. According to the Jobs Rated Almanac, the five most stressful jobs are:
1. President of the United States
2. Firefighter
3. Senior corporate executive
4. Race car driver
5. Taxi driver
The five least stressful jobs, according to the Jobs Rated Almanac, are:
1. Medical records technician
2. Janitor
3. Forklift operator
4. Musical instrument repairer
5. Florist

I think it bothers me a bit that a medical records technician's job isn't stressful...you SHOULD be stressed. Keeps you on your a-game. That being said, I once was item #5 (although being 14 years old nothing is stressful...oh wait, this is me we'er talking about. The only job that I felt wasn't stressful was Le Chateau, because I was there for so long and I was the quickest person on the cash register...so when the store got crazy busy, i was automatically put on the cash register which is easy monkey work).

Naturally being a florist isn't stressful...although I sucked at floral arrangements and the only thing I could do properly was a simple bouquet of a dozen roses (with or without baby's breath, although I preferred to make it without). Other than not being able to arrange anything in a vase, the only other thing that bugged me was that my hands were marred from the roses' thorns...it'd say I had a ratio of 60:40 skin to holes on my palms. Which even then wouldn't be so bad if part of the job didn't involve packaging our own floral preservative, which was like pouring battery acid on all those wounds.

In other news, my Costco membership is expiring and I really don't feel like doling out another $50 for a membership (seriously, I hate costco. Almost as much as I hate 24HF. You have to save $50 just to break even. And their prices are NOT that great...i've compared them elsewhere. I just go for the stuff that's costco-specific) until BBQ season. So last night I went on a huge grocery store spree and ended up talking to the cashier about how much people spend at costco.

She said that people easily blow $10-$15K, mostly because they're buying TVs and stuff. But then we started talking about the jewelry section...when i never really noticed because it's not like I'm going to buy anything and my goal with Costco is to get in and out asap (the longer you're there, the more you spend). She said that one time someone bought a $100K ring. It was 22 carats. They had to get the police to escort them out. Nuts!

And seems like bigwig executives buy jewelry there all the time. So I went again today at lunch and checked out the jewelry section...nothing was $100K, but there WAS a pair of diamond earrings...for $56K. FIFTY SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS...at Costco. I think they were a little over 2 carats. Most of the diamond stuff they had averaged between $2K to $15K. I just can't get over that you can buy a bulk box of detergent...and a pair of earrings that cost more than my car (and heck, i bought my car brand new!).

On to money matters...

So in February I have a CD that's finally expiring. Effing Bank of America...the rate was so crummy. I believe I put in around $3000 and earned $483 in interest. Gasp. Such a huge amount (grumble. I think the crummy rate was 3%, which hardly keeps up with inflation). Anyway, so my debate when it expires has been:
1. Put the $3K towards the HELOC loan, put the rest in the botox fund (it's been awhile since i had it done).
2. Put the $3K towards the HELOC loan, get laser teeth whitening. I am obsessed with teeth, especially my own (naturally), and the past 2 years of drinking diet pepsi has stained them IMO.
3. Put a little under $3K towards teh HELOC loan, get a decent frickin' laptop.

Let's break this down. I went to the dentist today (my dentist kicks ASS. She works at another office and on Wednesday she's going to be working on Brad, Angelina, and all fifty of their kids) and she was like "you're nuts, you're teeth are white, you're fine. Just use the bleaching trays you already have" (another reason why i love my dentist: 'cause they don't sell me crap to make a buck). And the hygienist agreed. But...i personally LIKE teeth that are milk- or paper-white. I've invested alot into my teeth (as have my parents) and if they have to glow to get attention, so be it. There's very few things I like about myself...my teeth deserve center stage.

But...well if she thinks it's not worth it, then fine.

I was going to forego the botox, but this morning I looked in the mirror and I think i wrinkled my forehead IN MY SLEEP. And it's making my whole face look haggard. The only problem with botox is that you do have to maintain it...granted, the mroe you do it the less you have to get it done (i.e. down to 1x/year), but until then it's kinda pricey.

So that leaves the laptop. Which is the smart choice, assuming that I verifythe bootlegged s/w I have (Office 2003, Dreamweaver, etc) works on Vista since that's all you can pretty much get (and i'll i'd want...i wouldn't want to get a laptop with XP only to later upgrade it to Vista since hardware with Vista pre-installed was designed specifically for it. I'm not f*king around with microsoft).

THEN...i was scoping out HP laptops (my favs are HP or Sony Vaio laptops...HP because that printer of mine was kickass and it sens a message ot me about the reliability, Vaio because i had one once for work and loved it), their mousepad track thingy is awful. So...we'll see.

The Ultimate Cheapskate’s Road Map to True Riches

It seems that there's a "community" if you will of compiled personal finance blogs (do a search for "pf blogs" and it'll come up. Anyway, I came across one websites review of The Ultimate Cheapskate’s Road Map to True Riches by Jeff Yeager.

Apparently the author has 6 rules for "ruling your gold":
1. Live within your means at thirty, and stay there.
Well I'm 30 and I think I'm living within my means. But I have massive debt (the house, the cars) but then again, other things get paid in full (credit card bill, property taxes, etc). The blog that I found this from mentioned living the way you did at 25...well at 25 my rent was $1710/month for a 700sq.ft. apartment...no wait that was when I was 23. At 25 my rent was $1400 for a two bedroom two bathroom apartment (hmmm but split with two people, that's only $700 each). If you split what Kraig and I pay, it's around $1400 each...but that's for interest-only which I guess is the same as renting...anyway, forget how you lived at 25. At 25 I didn't have life insurance, disability insurance, homeowner's insurance (renter's insurance is wayyy cheaper)...but true, there's no reason to exceed the lifestyle we have now.

2. Never underestimate the power of not spending.
Oh trust me, I don't underestimate that at all...there's times I'll be at target with a full basket of crap only to later walk out with just a bottle of conditioner. I can talk myself out of any purchase, and I actually get a sense of pride when I do that.

3. Discretion is the better part of shopping.
Once again, this isn't that hard to do. It's pretty easy to look at an item and assess if you NEED it vs. if you WANT it, and where you can find it cheaper. Heck, I have never bought Holiday cards full price, I buy all my holiday crap on December 26th. So doing good so far.

4. Do for yourself what you could have others do for you.
This is a huge deal for me, because I know so many people who hire people to do stuff. I can't justify hiring a maid as much as I'd love to...because we don't even have kids and we're not here during the day to mess up the house, I can't justify paying someone for a skill (cleaning) that I already own. Which is also why I tried my hand at plumbing, and why I still have outdoor motion-detector lights sitting in my office (I know Kraig and I could install them ourselves but since it's electrical, I figure it would help to read ALOT on it first). Every time I've caved and hired someone it's been a huge feeling of defeat, but then again it's also been a necessity (and every single time, at least we tried!)

5. Anyone can negotiate anything.
Now this is where I have problems. If it's something that I used to do (say, banking or retail), then negotiating is not a problem. Other than that however, I'm pretty useless. I tend to take a "oh well, I tried" attitude the minute I get shot down. I remember going garage-saling in the bay area and I had to get Marlene to negotiate a price for me, 'cause I was just too chicken to do it. WTF, too chicken to offend a garage sale woman over something for a buck?!! Definitely need to improve on this tactic.

6. Pinch the dollars, and the pennies will pinch themselves. This is the message that Elizabeth Warren preaches: limit your spending on the big things (like your mortgage), and you won’t have to worry so much about saving money on groceries.
Hmmm well this isn't so easy. The mortgage and cars have already been purchased, and there really was no way we could get around the house situation (we were being pushed out and naturally we didn't know we would single handedly stop the housing market). Plus with my car, I knew that I would have it for at least 15 years so certain factors were important (getting the limited edition so that we could get the dual temperatures...VERY important on long drives to the bay area!). I guess other than having to buy those items (2 cars, 1 house) we've done okay. Heck, I don't even visit my own family because of the cost of airfare. We recently stayed at a super ultra posh Hyatt Regency for only $60 because of Priceline (that would have cost us alot more if I had done something like hotels.com or even gone straight to Hyatt's website). So...I think in the grand scheme it's not too hard to watch yer dough with the big purchases, and if you make them odds are it's out of necessity.
Or maybe just 'cause I'm a chick...i can't imagine buying a house or a car on a whim.


There’s a lot more to The Ultimate Cheapskate’s Road Map to True Riches. Yeager covers topics like:

* Eating well for cheap. (Yeager tries to buy food that costs less than a dollar per pound.)
* Buying a sensible home and then repaying the mortgage as soon as possible.
* Commuting without a car.
* Cheap entertainment. Yeager encourages readers to make the most of their hobbies.

Ultimately, the message of this book is that stuff will not make you happy. Happiness comes from knowing when you have enough. In his final chapter, Yeager stresses the importance of amassing a quality of life over a quantity of stuff. “Many choices you must make [involve] the trade-off between money and time,” he writes. “By being cheap…you’re valuing time and the things you can do with it more than money and the things you can buy with it.”

Well I'd say I eat cheap, considering my lunch is usually just canned soup and I try to make Kraig a lunch as often as possible...and if we eat out it's courtesy of the Entertainment Book. As for buying a sensible home...yeah well this is southern california. Paying it off will never happen in anyone's lifetime. Commuting without a car is also impossible in southern california, unless I want to take the bus at 5am for a 12 mile commute and most likely get assaulted along the way. Cheap entertainment...lots of tv and Netflix, yeah!

New Year's Goals

Now that I'm on this hardcore thing to reduce the home equity loan, I've found some fantastic websites on cash, frugality, and other random stuff about the almighty dollar. One of these days i'll get around to posting them.

So here's the unofficial 2008 New Year's Goals. The key here is that a given month's goals may be swapped for another month's goals. And any of these goals may get shifted based on a pending trip to Ottawa/Toronto.

Jan
- fill out that Insurance Inventory kit thing I got (doesn't serve much point to have replacement insurance if you can't prove you have the stuff in the first place)
- continue ebaying mags (50% of the remaining amount)

Feb
- ebay the remaining magazine lot
- fill out the Life Doc info

March
- paint kitchen cabinets

April
- paint kitchen cabinets (2 month project...because i know i'm lazy)

May
- paint kitchen walls
- sand, fill in holes, paint front door

June
- complete my other website about cube life(it's already up if you're bored but it's nowhere near complete, email me for the link 'cause i'm not posting it here)

July
- paint upstairs hallway

Aug
- read all the French books i've got (figure this is a good summer goal with beach reading and all that)

Sept
- paint the door trim and handrail
- Liz's wedding (not really a goal so much as a reminder to not do anything crazy this month)

Oct
- complete Kraigart.com for my sweetie

November and December
Free, or to use to complete any of the other stuff that didn't get wrapped up.

And of course, pay down that damn home equity loan.

The ghetto avenue boys

So I updated my blog template to display a tracker for the 2008 home loan paydown (which is kind of cheating because it includes stuff paid down from this year...but whatever). Scroll all the way down to the end if you're curious to know the status.

If you don't buy clothes or purses that would sure save you at least an extra $200-$300 a month...right?

Good Lord Marlene! :P I think I spent that much a YEAR! But I'm glad I've got support, 'cause I'm gonna need it this upcoming year that's for sure...

Can't believe 2007 is almost over...i can't believe it'll be THIRTY ONE next year...

Bryan: you still owe me pics of your place...

I resolve to create a resolution

The year is coming to an end...and its time to start thinking of NY's resolutions.

There was the year where I vowed to be more refined...didn't really succeed. Suck it.

Then I believe last year I decided to do "monthly goals" which I really liked, but then it got sidetrakced with the goal of getting my PMP certification (which I did get, so I achieved that yearly goal).

Now i'm sitting here wondering what to do for 2008. I'm inspired by AJ Jacobs who went a year trying to follow the bible as close as possible (A Year of Living Biblically...i've got his other book on how he read Encyclopdia Brittanica cover to cover, he's hilarious) so I wondered...what is something that i should do for one year...like my own social experiment?

The only thing I could think of would be: no clothes, shoes, or purses for all of 2008. That's doable, and it goes into the next part of the goal for 2008: I need to pay at least $15K extra towards my home equity loan or else we're in a world of hurt. Yay for the housing debacle. Anyway, back to the no clothes purchase for 2008. For any weddings I have to go to I've got plenty of things I can wear, and I guess if my black boots wear out then I can pay to repair them because I truly do love them.

But...then I remembered that I really wanted to take advantage of spring ski sales and I do need a ski jacket and ski pants...well by "need" i mean, "I have skis and i've only gone skiing ONCE in the past 7 years and to do that i had to borrow someone else's apparel which isn't gonna fly anymore".

So now i'm wondering...can I just say i'll go the entire year not buying shoes, purses, or clothes EXCEPT for one ski jacket and ski pants? That's not exactly an impulse or frivolous purchase, I've been meaning for years to do that.

However, if i truly want to be frugal I could wear the coat and snowpants (oh yes, they're "snowpants") that I had when I was like 14, which is this bright purple and blue coat with bright purple snowpants. They're not stylish, but they're what i wore skiing as a kid (then again, i also wasn't that warm in them...but i do have my old Columbia ski jacket but the zipper broke...but that's also an excuse, i've got workarounds tot he zipper situation you can still zip it up...just not easily...anyway).

So...that's one thought to consider.

The next part is what I already mentioned...$15K has to be paid down on the home equity (i.e. $30K over two years according to my COuntrywide guy)...which is no easy task when you need to spend your year saving $6K just for flippin' property taxes. And that's not really a "resolution" as much as a "fo' sho' you better pay down that loan or else you're homeless"...

OR...i could go back to the monthly goals. Like as a result of the PMP certification there's something that goes along with that (that i won't post) that i'd LIKE to get accomplished at the very latest by end of February, but that's not necessarily up to me...but like one month to paint the kitchen cabinets...another month to paint the upstairs hallway...another month to paint the kitchen itself...another month to do something once and for all with the garage (although i'd like to epoxy the floors, buying that stuff will take away from the $15K that needs to go to the equity), another month to read all the french books i keep meaning to read, another month to truly clear out the spare bedroom (i'm working on it, it involves ALOT of ebaying)...

I also found this website (Weekend Cookbook Challenge) that inspired me...basicallyt he gist is that you gotta open up a cookbook of yours and make one thing in a weekend. As someone who's got a desk job, that's not an easy task...heck, my biggest challenge is going grocery shopping because I can't stand doing it after work, and there's only so much you can buy in advance without it getting spoiled (and becuase it's just kraig and I, lots of times i waste stuff...like 1/4 of onions leave 3/4 to get wasted pretty easily). But i really do enjoy cooking, and I'd like to do more of it.

I could also take Nicole's advice and add to this NY's resolution list to "Join forces with your brother to better manage parental unit guilt trips." which is a fantastic idea...

Stay tuned. The key to a successful NY resolution is to not make it too big where it's easy to fail, but important enough to where you'll want to stick it it.

Kahhh Toe Mahhh Tayy!