Okay so nothing meaningful to say.
Was gonna do a big summary of all the pop culture stuff from the past year....
...but I'm tired, I'm gonna nap, i'm gonna go to the gym, gonna pluck my eyebrows, gonna shower, gonna doll myself up for tonight...
And honestly, this was SUCH an uneventful year. At least 2 years ago, I got married.
Last year I bought a house, had to put one cat to sleep, got a kitten...
This year...other than my mom's WAY overstayed visit...it was a pretty vanilla year. Which I guess, if I look back on past years (no job, no place to live, etc)....that's probably a good thing.
So anyway...
Have a happy new year everyone! And remember...resolutions for 2006:
1. To be elegant and refined (i.e. to be a grownup finally!)
2. To be a better wife!
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Friday, December 30, 2005
Odd survey....
Okay this is gonna be my 2nd last post for 2005...'cause I think tomorrow there needs to be some formal wrap-up of the year or something.
BUT....just in the event that anyone is bored (i'm killing time before I go to the gym...i hate going before 10pm!)....
Odd Survey
Current mood: geeky
1: Grab the book nearest you, turn to page 18, what does line 4 say:
Okay well it's a Cosmo and line 4 says: It was comforting to read "Feel Sexy in Your Skin", an article based on hang-ups I've battled for years.
2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first? The monitor
3: What is the last thing you watched on TV? While Kraig and I were playing a new board game (a poker version of Scrabble), he had some cheesy movie on the SciFi channel.
4: WITHOUT LOOKING, what time is it? 9:41pm (oooh close...9:43!)
5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time? see above
6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? uhh...my typing? The sound of the tv?
7& 8: asked only in an alternate universe!!! no idea what that means, but I thought I invented "alternate universe". I need to search this quiz online to find out wtf.
9: What are you wearing? Track pants...and this fuzzy yellow top i wear to sleep. Yeah i'm a sexy bitch.
10: Did you dream last night? Yeah but it wasn't important. What WAS important was a dream I had a few nights ago.
Check it...
I dreamt that I had to have Tracy (yeah you all know her) and my boss, Trish, as my ROOMMATES. And we're talking SHARING a room. It was some fancy apartment near the Spectrum, except it looked like that place across from Valley Fair in San Jose.
And all I know is that I was already annoyed that Tracy was my roommate, let alone that I had to share closet space with 2 other girls, let alone a washing machine (the one joy of not having roommates anymore...NO SHARING OF THE LAUNDRY FACILITIES! I take my laundry way serious)....
It was a horrible dream. Plus i think I was paying $1000 in rent...who the f*ck pays that much when you have to share a ROOM with 2 other women!?
11: When did you last laugh? This afternoon when I saw Chris Rock: Bigger and Blacker on tv....
12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?2 shelves above me with storage boxes and mini My Little Pony, PowerPuff Girls, Yoda Pez dispenser, and my Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes tomato
13: Seen anything weird lately? amazingly....no.
14: What do you think of this quiz? Just don't ask me the ol' "eat the stems of broccoli? Had your heart broken" crap.
15: What is the last film you saw? Narnia
16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? I'd pay off the house, the cars, the timeshare, the credit card bills...then i'd pay off my family and friends' debts...and then see what's leftover.
17: Tell me something about yourself that I don't know.
Since I don't know who you are, that's alot. Ummmm...
- I can turn my eyelids inside out...and keep them that way....
- I used to be able to read Arabic perfectly
- I have never been able to do a cartwheel
- In grade 5 we had to memerize this French song because the teacher had a crush on the singer (and she used it as an excuse to make us learn it, memerize it, and then give it to us as a spelling test)...every now and then, that song STILL pops into my head....along with the stupid video
- During my formative Saved By The Bell Years, we didn't have a tv....my parents literally threw it out...but I didn't tell any of my friends, which is a pretty hard secret to keep for like 5-6 years....
18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? Ha this made me think of Ben Affleck on SNL "irregahhhd-less"....anyway...i'd make it so that no animal ever gets abused/tortured/hunted-for-stupid-chinese-sex-potions ever again. Humans don't have to count as animals.
19: Do you like to dance? The best kind is just you and a guy, with the music on, in the bedroom, and YES with clothes on....
20: George Bush? No i'm good thanks.
21: Would you ever consider living abroad? Am I not technically doing that now already?!!
22. Ever been given a ring? Been given....10 (1 sapphire ring from my parents, one promise ring from Kevin, 2 silver bands from Adam, one sapphire ring from Adam, one silver one from Birks from Adam, 2 engagement and 2 wedding rings from Kraig)...not including rings I've "borrowed" from my mom that she doesn't wear anyway.
23. Longest relationship? I think right now I'm tied....4 years for both.
24. Last gift you received: It was xmas...so...um yeah that fabulous sweater...a cat footstool thing...a bizarre cat food dish for the cats....boardgames...(one of them being a used Baby Boomer edition of Trivial Pursuit...wtf!!)...
25. How many times have you dropped your cell phone? My current one? just like once or twice. My old one....argh like a million.
26. Last sport you played? does going to the gym count as a sport? Otherwise...geezus....does naked wrestling count?
27. Things you spend a lot of money on? argh argh. Utilities. Bills. The house. The good folks at TARGET.
28. Three things you ate last? ...chicken salad...butternut squash soup...diet pepsi...
29. First thing you notice about the opposite sex? let's do the list...
- the hands...
- the shoulders....
- ideally, back of the neck...(sometimes not always possible)..
30. Your favorite photo album? WTF kind of retarded question is that?
31. Where do you live? somewhere way too overpriced
32. High school you attended? Sir Wilfrid Laurier Secondary School. Sir Wil was a prime minister mother effers! Home of the Lancers. Don't know what a Lancer is? Neither does anyone else (it's another word for "knight"...a dude with a big long sword thingy)....
33. Cell phone service provider? Verizon with not enough text messaging in my package
34. Favorite mall store? Sigh can't afford the mall! Okay i bought some stuff from Forever21...but overall I'd say Express. It's got stuff for both work and fun.
35. Longest Job held? 4 years.
36. Do you own a pair of dice? Who doesn't? ALthough with a husband who plays D&D...I can open a museum of dice stuff...
37. Do you prank call people? it's called Call Display mother effers. Although *69 works differently here in the US than it does in Canada.
38. Last wedding attended? Natalie and Heikki's this summer in Ottawa.
39. First friend you'd call if you won the lottery? Honestly?....tough call...but I'd say Carrie, only because she'd calm me down and remind me that before I go buy millions of crap at Target...that I have a mortgage to pay off first.
40. Last time you attended church? Let's count all the times i've ever been in a church:
- one time in some historic thing in Montreal
- Christine's wedding
- the historical stuff in the San Juan (Juaquin? whatever) mission
- Trish's sister's memorial service
Being in a church WEIRDS ME OUT....
41. Favorite fast food restaurant? In Canada....KFC all the way (poutine!)...in the US...toss up between Quizno's or In n Out...
42. Biggest lie you have heard? "My roommate molested me while I was sleeping"....
44. Where's your favorite place to eat with friends? Depends which friends! Sometimes I miss all the times I dragged my friends to East Side...but then again, now I get to drag friends to new places here in Cali...
45. Can you cook? Yeah but if the recipe sucks, it's not my fault.
46. What car do you drive? A deathmobile...99 Nissan Sentra.
47. Best kisser? It's been so long, I can't remember! I only remember the bad ones.
48. Last time you cried? Don't ask
49. Most hated food? pork! Okay for non-religious reasons...butter...fish....
50. Thing you like most about yourself? Nothing. I guess if I had to....lol my nails, i never ever need to get acrylics or a french manicure...
51. Thing you hate most about yourself? My gut, my lack of boobs, my lack of proportion, my THIGHS omg....my skin, my asymetrical eyelids, my small feet (try finding shoes on sale with these suckers! it sucks!), my hair, my eyes...the list goes on and on....
53. Longest work shift worked? Every year during the xmas holidays..."Midnight madness"...omg...like 8am till....1am? Wearing INSANE high heels....i used to panic and research Varicose Veins...if I ever, ever get them...i'm blaming working at the mall.
54. Favorite Movie? I hate these questions.
55. Can you sing? Oh HELL no. Although that doesn't stop me when i'm driving to work in the morning. Or driving home. Or making Kraig suffer when we're doin glong car rides.
56. Favorite place? to....?
I found 7 and 8 online:
7: : When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Earlier today. WEnt to the bank and the mall. Oh and then took out some trash. Good times.
8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
Uh alternating between that website and this Blogger page.
That was retarded, why would that be in an "alternate universe"?
Okay it's 10:20pm, I can now get ready for the gym. Booyah.
I should post ALL the comments about that sweater...
OMG! That's too funny! I showed it to Lindsay and we were killing ourselves!
BUT....just in the event that anyone is bored (i'm killing time before I go to the gym...i hate going before 10pm!)....
Odd Survey
Current mood: geeky
1: Grab the book nearest you, turn to page 18, what does line 4 say:
Okay well it's a Cosmo and line 4 says: It was comforting to read "Feel Sexy in Your Skin", an article based on hang-ups I've battled for years.
2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first? The monitor
3: What is the last thing you watched on TV? While Kraig and I were playing a new board game (a poker version of Scrabble), he had some cheesy movie on the SciFi channel.
4: WITHOUT LOOKING, what time is it? 9:41pm (oooh close...9:43!)
5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time? see above
6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? uhh...my typing? The sound of the tv?
7& 8: asked only in an alternate universe!!! no idea what that means, but I thought I invented "alternate universe". I need to search this quiz online to find out wtf.
9: What are you wearing? Track pants...and this fuzzy yellow top i wear to sleep. Yeah i'm a sexy bitch.
10: Did you dream last night? Yeah but it wasn't important. What WAS important was a dream I had a few nights ago.
Check it...
I dreamt that I had to have Tracy (yeah you all know her) and my boss, Trish, as my ROOMMATES. And we're talking SHARING a room. It was some fancy apartment near the Spectrum, except it looked like that place across from Valley Fair in San Jose.
And all I know is that I was already annoyed that Tracy was my roommate, let alone that I had to share closet space with 2 other girls, let alone a washing machine (the one joy of not having roommates anymore...NO SHARING OF THE LAUNDRY FACILITIES! I take my laundry way serious)....
It was a horrible dream. Plus i think I was paying $1000 in rent...who the f*ck pays that much when you have to share a ROOM with 2 other women!?
11: When did you last laugh? This afternoon when I saw Chris Rock: Bigger and Blacker on tv....
12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?2 shelves above me with storage boxes and mini My Little Pony, PowerPuff Girls, Yoda Pez dispenser, and my Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes tomato
13: Seen anything weird lately? amazingly....no.
14: What do you think of this quiz? Just don't ask me the ol' "eat the stems of broccoli? Had your heart broken" crap.
15: What is the last film you saw? Narnia
16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? I'd pay off the house, the cars, the timeshare, the credit card bills...then i'd pay off my family and friends' debts...and then see what's leftover.
17: Tell me something about yourself that I don't know.
Since I don't know who you are, that's alot. Ummmm...
- I can turn my eyelids inside out...and keep them that way....
- I used to be able to read Arabic perfectly
- I have never been able to do a cartwheel
- In grade 5 we had to memerize this French song because the teacher had a crush on the singer (and she used it as an excuse to make us learn it, memerize it, and then give it to us as a spelling test)...every now and then, that song STILL pops into my head....along with the stupid video
- During my formative Saved By The Bell Years, we didn't have a tv....my parents literally threw it out...but I didn't tell any of my friends, which is a pretty hard secret to keep for like 5-6 years....
18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do? Ha this made me think of Ben Affleck on SNL "irregahhhd-less"....anyway...i'd make it so that no animal ever gets abused/tortured/hunted-for-stupid-chinese-sex-potions ever again. Humans don't have to count as animals.
19: Do you like to dance? The best kind is just you and a guy, with the music on, in the bedroom, and YES with clothes on....
20: George Bush? No i'm good thanks.
21: Would you ever consider living abroad? Am I not technically doing that now already?!!
22. Ever been given a ring? Been given....10 (1 sapphire ring from my parents, one promise ring from Kevin, 2 silver bands from Adam, one sapphire ring from Adam, one silver one from Birks from Adam, 2 engagement and 2 wedding rings from Kraig)...not including rings I've "borrowed" from my mom that she doesn't wear anyway.
23. Longest relationship? I think right now I'm tied....4 years for both.
24. Last gift you received: It was xmas...so...um yeah that fabulous sweater...a cat footstool thing...a bizarre cat food dish for the cats....boardgames...(one of them being a used Baby Boomer edition of Trivial Pursuit...wtf!!)...
25. How many times have you dropped your cell phone? My current one? just like once or twice. My old one....argh like a million.
26. Last sport you played? does going to the gym count as a sport? Otherwise...geezus....does naked wrestling count?
27. Things you spend a lot of money on? argh argh. Utilities. Bills. The house. The good folks at TARGET.
28. Three things you ate last? ...chicken salad...butternut squash soup...diet pepsi...
29. First thing you notice about the opposite sex? let's do the list...
- the hands...
- the shoulders....
- ideally, back of the neck...(sometimes not always possible)..
30. Your favorite photo album? WTF kind of retarded question is that?
31. Where do you live? somewhere way too overpriced
32. High school you attended? Sir Wilfrid Laurier Secondary School. Sir Wil was a prime minister mother effers! Home of the Lancers. Don't know what a Lancer is? Neither does anyone else (it's another word for "knight"...a dude with a big long sword thingy)....
33. Cell phone service provider? Verizon with not enough text messaging in my package
34. Favorite mall store? Sigh can't afford the mall! Okay i bought some stuff from Forever21...but overall I'd say Express. It's got stuff for both work and fun.
35. Longest Job held? 4 years.
36. Do you own a pair of dice? Who doesn't? ALthough with a husband who plays D&D...I can open a museum of dice stuff...
37. Do you prank call people? it's called Call Display mother effers. Although *69 works differently here in the US than it does in Canada.
38. Last wedding attended? Natalie and Heikki's this summer in Ottawa.
39. First friend you'd call if you won the lottery? Honestly?....tough call...but I'd say Carrie, only because she'd calm me down and remind me that before I go buy millions of crap at Target...that I have a mortgage to pay off first.
40. Last time you attended church? Let's count all the times i've ever been in a church:
- one time in some historic thing in Montreal
- Christine's wedding
- the historical stuff in the San Juan (Juaquin? whatever) mission
- Trish's sister's memorial service
Being in a church WEIRDS ME OUT....
41. Favorite fast food restaurant? In Canada....KFC all the way (poutine!)...in the US...toss up between Quizno's or In n Out...
42. Biggest lie you have heard? "My roommate molested me while I was sleeping"....
44. Where's your favorite place to eat with friends? Depends which friends! Sometimes I miss all the times I dragged my friends to East Side...but then again, now I get to drag friends to new places here in Cali...
45. Can you cook? Yeah but if the recipe sucks, it's not my fault.
46. What car do you drive? A deathmobile...99 Nissan Sentra.
47. Best kisser? It's been so long, I can't remember! I only remember the bad ones.
48. Last time you cried? Don't ask
49. Most hated food? pork! Okay for non-religious reasons...butter...fish....
50. Thing you like most about yourself? Nothing. I guess if I had to....lol my nails, i never ever need to get acrylics or a french manicure...
51. Thing you hate most about yourself? My gut, my lack of boobs, my lack of proportion, my THIGHS omg....my skin, my asymetrical eyelids, my small feet (try finding shoes on sale with these suckers! it sucks!), my hair, my eyes...the list goes on and on....
53. Longest work shift worked? Every year during the xmas holidays..."Midnight madness"...omg...like 8am till....1am? Wearing INSANE high heels....i used to panic and research Varicose Veins...if I ever, ever get them...i'm blaming working at the mall.
54. Favorite Movie? I hate these questions.
55. Can you sing? Oh HELL no. Although that doesn't stop me when i'm driving to work in the morning. Or driving home. Or making Kraig suffer when we're doin glong car rides.
56. Favorite place? to....?
A HA!!!
I found 7 and 8 online:
7: : When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Earlier today. WEnt to the bank and the mall. Oh and then took out some trash. Good times.
8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at?
Uh alternating between that website and this Blogger page.
That was retarded, why would that be in an "alternate universe"?
Okay it's 10:20pm, I can now get ready for the gym. Booyah.
I should post ALL the comments about that sweater...
OMG! That's too funny! I showed it to Lindsay and we were killing ourselves!
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Why I'm a moron today....
Side note: ha ha it seems EVERYONE just loves that sweater I got from my mother in law...
Why I'm a moron today....
I was scoping out my new food processor (I had to bite the bullet and realize that a cuisineart to match the toaster and blender wasn't gonna happen in my lifetime...so I bought a black and decker. Suck it).
Stupid me holds the cup thingy upside down to scope something out...
...with the blade in it...
...yeah guess who's arm got sliced by her new food processor.
I'm SUCH a frickin' moron.
On another note, who's the best wife in the world? Yeah me...'cause I made dinner from scratch for my husband (which i NEVER do...not anymore...too much of a pain when it's just the two of us...and it's pricier)....
...AND...i also made butternut squash soup with sage....
Do you know how effing hard it is to peel and seed frickin' butternut squash?! Pain in my ass! I'll probably make another batch because it tastes ridiculously good and I've got leftover sage (wtf am I gonna use sage for? I've never used it in my life)...
It's all part of Part Two of my new year's resolution...part 1 is to be more REFINED and ELEGANT...part 2 is to be a better wife.
And wives good dinner from scratch for their husbands...okay maybe not every night, but at least once a week!
Dr. Phil yesterday (hey I was sick, and i had to watch alot of tv....) was about what makes a good wife....and this one dude wanted his wife (with 3 small kids) to have everything perfect AND for her to wear little itty bitty outfits WHEN SHE WASHED HIS CAR...
...which really woudln't be THAT bad if she didn't have frickin' kids to look after, if I didn't have kids and I didn't have to work, effing right I'll wear lingerie and wash Kraig's car like that too, what do I care (however with kids, you're lucky if I don't take that sponge that shove it up your ass for asking)...
Anyway I figured at the very least, we don't even have kids...I can go back to making him dinner and lunch and stuff. I used to make him lunch EVERY single day. And then he complained that my lunches were making him fat. But...that was another era and it seems like my husband now would be appreciative of homemade lunches again.
.....
keep in mind, I don't even wash my car NOW....ha let alone in lingerie...but never underestimate the power of my unwillingness to have a 9-5 job and what I'll do to support that dream lifestyle!
Why I'm a moron today....
I was scoping out my new food processor (I had to bite the bullet and realize that a cuisineart to match the toaster and blender wasn't gonna happen in my lifetime...so I bought a black and decker. Suck it).
Stupid me holds the cup thingy upside down to scope something out...
...with the blade in it...
...yeah guess who's arm got sliced by her new food processor.
I'm SUCH a frickin' moron.
On another note, who's the best wife in the world? Yeah me...'cause I made dinner from scratch for my husband (which i NEVER do...not anymore...too much of a pain when it's just the two of us...and it's pricier)....
...AND...i also made butternut squash soup with sage....
Do you know how effing hard it is to peel and seed frickin' butternut squash?! Pain in my ass! I'll probably make another batch because it tastes ridiculously good and I've got leftover sage (wtf am I gonna use sage for? I've never used it in my life)...
It's all part of Part Two of my new year's resolution...part 1 is to be more REFINED and ELEGANT...part 2 is to be a better wife.
And wives good dinner from scratch for their husbands...okay maybe not every night, but at least once a week!
Dr. Phil yesterday (hey I was sick, and i had to watch alot of tv....) was about what makes a good wife....and this one dude wanted his wife (with 3 small kids) to have everything perfect AND for her to wear little itty bitty outfits WHEN SHE WASHED HIS CAR...
...which really woudln't be THAT bad if she didn't have frickin' kids to look after, if I didn't have kids and I didn't have to work, effing right I'll wear lingerie and wash Kraig's car like that too, what do I care (however with kids, you're lucky if I don't take that sponge that shove it up your ass for asking)...
Anyway I figured at the very least, we don't even have kids...I can go back to making him dinner and lunch and stuff. I used to make him lunch EVERY single day. And then he complained that my lunches were making him fat. But...that was another era and it seems like my husband now would be appreciative of homemade lunches again.
.....
keep in mind, I don't even wash my car NOW....ha let alone in lingerie...but never underestimate the power of my unwillingness to have a 9-5 job and what I'll do to support that dream lifestyle!
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
169 posts....
Dang 169 posts in this blog.
So real quick....
1. I have to give props to my husband. The poor guy. He tried to come home today 'cause he's sick (as usual...), they closed down the highway because someone DIED....it was right outside of Gilroy, so I asked him to go to the Pfalzgraff outlet to pick up some stuff for our dinnerware set....
Any nuts he had left are completely gone and he knows it...he must have been in that store for over an HOUR (they're closing that location and all our crap was on sale) while I went through our cupboards and the Online Store:Mystic Pattern to see what we needed....
I can't believe he did that. I mean, you think a guy going to the store to buy you tampons is love? He actually was trying to convince me to get the TEA KETTLE....I had to put the smackdown on his purchases....
2. In the Kevin Federline: I Scored Me A Sugar Mama category set....the 2005 award goes to the dude who proposed to Tori Spelling this weekend. FOUR months of dating. AND they're both going through a divorce. The dude has balls...and I give him massive credit for jumping the gun and asking so early. Her father must be like "yeah, great, you're paying for this one you moron...."even with a prenup, this guy's gonna score BIG.
It's easy for a guy to score a rich hollywood babe....(or non-babe)...most of them have horrible self esteem so they'll take anyone they think will love them forever. I can't score me a rich guy without getting boatloads of plastic surgery. It's not fair. Even scamming people isn't equal-opportunity.
3. I saw an interview from earlier this year with Angelina. The girl is looking ROUGH. I mean, she's a total Monet...great at a distance but up close she's a big ol' mess. That girl is a walking sign for "airbrush me...please!"....she's just not aging well. She's starting to look...witch-like...like i'm sure she'd be hot when you're drunk but if you had to wake up to that the next morning, you'd scream like a little girl.
Alright time to tackle cleaning the spare bedroom. Yes (to my friends who've seen the house), the room that was SUPPOSED to stay empty so that we never got used to using it because one day it'll be the nursery. Well at best the cats can sneak in there...it's become the Horigan Storage Facility. Not cool.
The song of the day is Around The Way Girl by LL Cool J
Perm in your hair or even a curly weave
With that New Edition Bobby Brown button on your sleeve
So real quick....
1. I have to give props to my husband. The poor guy. He tried to come home today 'cause he's sick (as usual...), they closed down the highway because someone DIED....it was right outside of Gilroy, so I asked him to go to the Pfalzgraff outlet to pick up some stuff for our dinnerware set....
Any nuts he had left are completely gone and he knows it...he must have been in that store for over an HOUR (they're closing that location and all our crap was on sale) while I went through our cupboards and the Online Store:Mystic Pattern to see what we needed....
I can't believe he did that. I mean, you think a guy going to the store to buy you tampons is love? He actually was trying to convince me to get the TEA KETTLE....I had to put the smackdown on his purchases....
2. In the Kevin Federline: I Scored Me A Sugar Mama category set....the 2005 award goes to the dude who proposed to Tori Spelling this weekend. FOUR months of dating. AND they're both going through a divorce. The dude has balls...and I give him massive credit for jumping the gun and asking so early. Her father must be like "yeah, great, you're paying for this one you moron...."even with a prenup, this guy's gonna score BIG.
It's easy for a guy to score a rich hollywood babe....(or non-babe)...most of them have horrible self esteem so they'll take anyone they think will love them forever. I can't score me a rich guy without getting boatloads of plastic surgery. It's not fair. Even scamming people isn't equal-opportunity.
3. I saw an interview from earlier this year with Angelina. The girl is looking ROUGH. I mean, she's a total Monet...great at a distance but up close she's a big ol' mess. That girl is a walking sign for "airbrush me...please!"....she's just not aging well. She's starting to look...witch-like...like i'm sure she'd be hot when you're drunk but if you had to wake up to that the next morning, you'd scream like a little girl.
Alright time to tackle cleaning the spare bedroom. Yes (to my friends who've seen the house), the room that was SUPPOSED to stay empty so that we never got used to using it because one day it'll be the nursery. Well at best the cats can sneak in there...it's become the Horigan Storage Facility. Not cool.
The song of the day is Around The Way Girl by LL Cool J
Perm in your hair or even a curly weave
With that New Edition Bobby Brown button on your sleeve
Monday, December 26, 2005
Two reasons....
Two reasons why I'm an effing moron:
1) So I did MASSIVE Boxing Day shopping.
I hate Christmas....but I love Boxing Day. I take that sh*t seriously mother effer, don't mess with me on the 26th.
I had to make TWO trips to Walmart, and the only reason I didn't do a third was 'cause I didn't have room in my car.
I had people in LINE telling me I was genius for the stuff I was buying, because clearly I was doing my holiday shopping for the next 50 years.
Anyway...
So i was putting all my stuff away (like the wonderful yet creepy and of course, tacky, little baby in a sled that my mother in law gave me for xmas last year) and i was running in an out of the garage putting stuff away...
I hadn't showered since the day before because I didn't have time this morning (my flight was at 7am) and i figured i'd shower when i got home, but then I dashed off to Walmart and then figured i'd shower AFTER i was done dealing with the nasty garage....
So i put my hair in a "blob" and bobby pinned my bangs back...
I saw one of my neighbors outside, did the "hi" social thing...wondered why he looked at me funny....
Ummm yeah I pinned my bangs so they stood WAY out...like basically I was the "crazy old lady next door"...a good 3 inches out in the air. I looked like a f*cking LUNATIC.
Nice.
2) So the plan was for me to see a dear friend (won't say her name for reasons that will become evident) in San Jose that I haven't seen since before I got married...got all excited, put her cell in my cell...she was gonna drive up from Gilroy....she texted me that day to let me know she was free whenever....
...Kraig and I go to dinner (didn't eat much at Xmas and i think now it's a tradition to go to this one Malai/Singaporean place) and I call and leave a message telling her that not much was open but there's a Denny's in Fremont, but that it was raining so I understood if she coudln't do the drive from Gilroy, blah blah.
I get a call back with the VM saying she didn't fully understand my message but that she had major news....
So I call HER back...and she talks about how she lives in RC, how she just got engaged....and then she mentioned her bday being that day.
me: "but your bday is in June..."
Her: "no, it's Xmas day...you remember that...."...
And suddenly I realize...
I called the FIRST person in my cell with this name....Instead of the one I had actually planned on seeing....Kraig was DYING laughing because he saw my expression when I realized I was having a conversation with the wrong person
((to my defense, I was in the Malai restaurant and it was loud so it took me longer to clue in than it would have normally))
I should have clued in when she said she had no idea where Fremont was....when she said she wasn't going to San Jose State....when she mentioned a fiance....
So i FINALLY call my friend at 10:30pm, and it's pouring rain anyway so she couldn't do the drive but I felt like SUCH a frickin' idiot because she probably thought I didn't want to see her, which is SO not true 'cause I missed her a ton and now I have to make sure I see her when I got up to San Jose next time.
SUCH A FRICKIN' MORON.
I swear it's amazing I haven't accidentally cut my own head off.
1) So I did MASSIVE Boxing Day shopping.
I hate Christmas....but I love Boxing Day. I take that sh*t seriously mother effer, don't mess with me on the 26th.
I had to make TWO trips to Walmart, and the only reason I didn't do a third was 'cause I didn't have room in my car.
I had people in LINE telling me I was genius for the stuff I was buying, because clearly I was doing my holiday shopping for the next 50 years.
Anyway...
So i was putting all my stuff away (like the wonderful yet creepy and of course, tacky, little baby in a sled that my mother in law gave me for xmas last year) and i was running in an out of the garage putting stuff away...
I hadn't showered since the day before because I didn't have time this morning (my flight was at 7am) and i figured i'd shower when i got home, but then I dashed off to Walmart and then figured i'd shower AFTER i was done dealing with the nasty garage....
So i put my hair in a "blob" and bobby pinned my bangs back...
I saw one of my neighbors outside, did the "hi" social thing...wondered why he looked at me funny....
Ummm yeah I pinned my bangs so they stood WAY out...like basically I was the "crazy old lady next door"...a good 3 inches out in the air. I looked like a f*cking LUNATIC.
Nice.
2) So the plan was for me to see a dear friend (won't say her name for reasons that will become evident) in San Jose that I haven't seen since before I got married...got all excited, put her cell in my cell...she was gonna drive up from Gilroy....she texted me that day to let me know she was free whenever....
...Kraig and I go to dinner (didn't eat much at Xmas and i think now it's a tradition to go to this one Malai/Singaporean place) and I call and leave a message telling her that not much was open but there's a Denny's in Fremont, but that it was raining so I understood if she coudln't do the drive from Gilroy, blah blah.
I get a call back with the VM saying she didn't fully understand my message but that she had major news....
So I call HER back...and she talks about how she lives in RC, how she just got engaged....and then she mentioned her bday being that day.
me: "but your bday is in June..."
Her: "no, it's Xmas day...you remember that...."...
And suddenly I realize...
I called the FIRST person in my cell with this name....Instead of the one I had actually planned on seeing....Kraig was DYING laughing because he saw my expression when I realized I was having a conversation with the wrong person
((to my defense, I was in the Malai restaurant and it was loud so it took me longer to clue in than it would have normally))
I should have clued in when she said she had no idea where Fremont was....when she said she wasn't going to San Jose State....when she mentioned a fiance....
So i FINALLY call my friend at 10:30pm, and it's pouring rain anyway so she couldn't do the drive but I felt like SUCH a frickin' idiot because she probably thought I didn't want to see her, which is SO not true 'cause I missed her a ton and now I have to make sure I see her when I got up to San Jose next time.
SUCH A FRICKIN' MORON.
I swear it's amazing I haven't accidentally cut my own head off.
Saturday, December 24, 2005
New blog....
I'm working on another blog.
Called...
My Husbands So Called Ailments...
since there has yet, EVER, and I'm not exaggerating, to have a day go by where Kraig doesn't gripe about some physical ailment or another.
Called...
My Husbands So Called Ailments...
since there has yet, EVER, and I'm not exaggerating, to have a day go by where Kraig doesn't gripe about some physical ailment or another.
Friday, December 23, 2005
Other people's diaries
I find other people's lives fascinating.
http://nudemuse.diary-x.com/" wrote
I also do not need people staring at me. It's fucking annoying.
Yes, there is a pierced black girl on the ferry reading a book.
Thank you move along please fucko.
You don't get piercings, weird hair, dress in bad clothes, whatever, and not expect to be stared at. Piercings were DESIGNED to be stared at. WTF.
http://songs-of-submission.diary-x.com/ wrote:
Nipple piercing in front of a crowd of people was not on my holiday, or even regular, fantasy list. But it was the perfect gift and it came at the perfect time. Being able to reach down and move the horseshoe shaped steel that is in my flesh has been invaluable in fighting off the old ideas and programming that makes my holiday so miserable. Despair rarely fails to take me at Christmas, Valentine's day and my birthday. But this year Mistress has provided. This time last year I was collared, but it had a taint to it, I had pushed to be collared. I was trying to save a sinking relationship overweighed by neglect and out of balance service. I was a fool, like the couple with marriage problems having a baby to bring them together, it was a disaster.
Uhhh...first off.....OW OW OW OW OWWWW that sounds painful...secondly....yeah getting "collared" is alot like an unhappy married couple having a baby...yeah 'cause one is the natural progression of life....wtf...
http://d1tzymx.diary-x.com/...no text, just wanted to say this is the WORST layout ever and geezus who the eff can read that crap?
http://quotidian.diary-x.com/ wrote:
Sometimes, I so badly wish for an eraser with which I could rub off all the terrible mistakes that I made in the past.
They were so not worth the lesson, just did not need to happen, could have so easily been avoided..
So, so true. Why is it that EVERY mistake has to be some sort of lesson, other than "today I learned...I'm a frickin' moron".
http://brunissen.diary-x.com/journal.cgi?action=currlink wrote:
18 days...That's how long I made it before I stopped at McDonald's for breakfast. Although I must say that even though they forgot to put the hash browns in the bag, I did enjoy it!
Let me tell you a little something about McD's...they pump FAT in the AIR. Their WATER is full of fat. I know. I used to work there. And I worked a brand new location which was scrutinized like crazy for health code stuff, etc, and I'm tellin' ya...that stuff is f*cking NASTY.
They had all their burgers and stuff on little timers, for when you were supposed to throw them out. Hash browns: 18 mins. But hash browns are a bitch to make (i.e. they're not quick, and if you've got a massive line then you're hosed)....so I would just swap the timers. And i did that with the food too. The chefs guys LOVED me becuase I would be like "uhh...all your Big Macs are waste"...and they'd look at me so upset and then I'd say "just gimme a new timer, no one has to know..."...
When in doubt...
Laziness trumps sanitization and safety when it comes to the food industry.
http://nudemuse.diary-x.com/" wrote
I also do not need people staring at me. It's fucking annoying.
Yes, there is a pierced black girl on the ferry reading a book.
Thank you move along please fucko.
You don't get piercings, weird hair, dress in bad clothes, whatever, and not expect to be stared at. Piercings were DESIGNED to be stared at. WTF.
http://songs-of-submission.diary-x.com/ wrote:
Nipple piercing in front of a crowd of people was not on my holiday, or even regular, fantasy list. But it was the perfect gift and it came at the perfect time. Being able to reach down and move the horseshoe shaped steel that is in my flesh has been invaluable in fighting off the old ideas and programming that makes my holiday so miserable. Despair rarely fails to take me at Christmas, Valentine's day and my birthday. But this year Mistress has provided. This time last year I was collared, but it had a taint to it, I had pushed to be collared. I was trying to save a sinking relationship overweighed by neglect and out of balance service. I was a fool, like the couple with marriage problems having a baby to bring them together, it was a disaster.
Uhhh...first off.....OW OW OW OW OWWWW that sounds painful...secondly....yeah getting "collared" is alot like an unhappy married couple having a baby...yeah 'cause one is the natural progression of life....wtf...
http://d1tzymx.diary-x.com/...no text, just wanted to say this is the WORST layout ever and geezus who the eff can read that crap?
http://quotidian.diary-x.com/ wrote:
Sometimes, I so badly wish for an eraser with which I could rub off all the terrible mistakes that I made in the past.
They were so not worth the lesson, just did not need to happen, could have so easily been avoided..
So, so true. Why is it that EVERY mistake has to be some sort of lesson, other than "today I learned...I'm a frickin' moron".
http://brunissen.diary-x.com/journal.cgi?action=currlink wrote:
18 days...That's how long I made it before I stopped at McDonald's for breakfast. Although I must say that even though they forgot to put the hash browns in the bag, I did enjoy it!
Let me tell you a little something about McD's...they pump FAT in the AIR. Their WATER is full of fat. I know. I used to work there. And I worked a brand new location which was scrutinized like crazy for health code stuff, etc, and I'm tellin' ya...that stuff is f*cking NASTY.
They had all their burgers and stuff on little timers, for when you were supposed to throw them out. Hash browns: 18 mins. But hash browns are a bitch to make (i.e. they're not quick, and if you've got a massive line then you're hosed)....so I would just swap the timers. And i did that with the food too. The chefs guys LOVED me becuase I would be like "uhh...all your Big Macs are waste"...and they'd look at me so upset and then I'd say "just gimme a new timer, no one has to know..."...
When in doubt...
Laziness trumps sanitization and safety when it comes to the food industry.
Celebrity blog
I'm sure after half a day the pics won't show up from excessive bandwidth usage...but...they'll do for now
Adriana Lima has a BIZARRE nose...i think she's FUG...
And wtf is up with Mariah....she goes almost naked in all her videos and then looks like she's bloated like a baby beluga:
And Jess....puh-lease...I LOVED you when you were on Newlyweds, I thought you were adorable when you first came out with your first single back in the day. But....it's so clear that you're trying to preserve your image and we all see through it. You should have kept your clothes on in your Boots Were Made For Walking video...
When I grow up I want to be Amanda Bynes...I love this chick....
Adriana Lima has a BIZARRE nose...i think she's FUG...
And wtf is up with Mariah....she goes almost naked in all her videos and then looks like she's bloated like a baby beluga:
And Jess....puh-lease...I LOVED you when you were on Newlyweds, I thought you were adorable when you first came out with your first single back in the day. But....it's so clear that you're trying to preserve your image and we all see through it. You should have kept your clothes on in your Boots Were Made For Walking video...
When I grow up I want to be Amanda Bynes...I love this chick....
Thursday, December 22, 2005
My blog needs a wife
Posting this quick
I always hate it when I leave sex toys at teh psychic's.
I hear ya. It happens more often than you think. Maybe that's why there's always sex shops right next to psychics.
The song of the WEEK is Anytime by Brian McKnight
Do I ever cross your mind, anytime
Do you ever wake up reaching out for me
Do I ever cross your mind, anytime
I miss you
It was on the radio this week...and an ex bf of mine once said that if we ever broke up, that was "our" song...stupid thing, to have a breakup song planned....but it worked, because even to this day YEARS later, it still makes me so terribly sad when I hear it.
And after chatting with some folks, and coming home today...
let's just say....
men
are
utterly
USELESS
All you need is a PPP (aka Triple P) and really, men aren't needed for JACK.
At best, they're cute to look at...but so are my cats.
I always hate it when I leave sex toys at teh psychic's.
I hear ya. It happens more often than you think. Maybe that's why there's always sex shops right next to psychics.
The song of the WEEK is Anytime by Brian McKnight
Do I ever cross your mind, anytime
Do you ever wake up reaching out for me
Do I ever cross your mind, anytime
I miss you
It was on the radio this week...and an ex bf of mine once said that if we ever broke up, that was "our" song...stupid thing, to have a breakup song planned....but it worked, because even to this day YEARS later, it still makes me so terribly sad when I hear it.
And after chatting with some folks, and coming home today...
let's just say....
men
are
utterly
USELESS
All you need is a PPP (aka Triple P) and really, men aren't needed for JACK.
At best, they're cute to look at...but so are my cats.
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
In n out Blog
It never ceases to amaze me the adventures Sabina has, anal beads?! If someone had asked me back in high school whether or not you would buy anal beads, (ya I know you're not gonna use them) I would've said no. But I also know that when Sabina has her mind set on something or needs to make a point then there's no changing her mind. :)
Hell no i wouldn't have used them!
But yep...when I need to prove a point...true dat. You know me well indeed Bry!
Hell no i wouldn't have used them!
But yep...when I need to prove a point...true dat. You know me well indeed Bry!
This blog's beefs
I really wanted to write a "You Too Can Be A Better Husband" blog, but since I've only ever had/have one husband, that would be more like "How Not To Be Kraig" and that would be so, so wrong! (And he really is a fantastic husband...well, the best one I've ever had anyway).
End of that note, onto another....
So on Sunday I flipped to the Simpsons, and mother effer it was your stupid ass hillbilly president speaking.
LIVE.
How do I know? Because it said "LIVE" on the corner of the screen.
HE WAS READING OFF A TELEPROMPTER
I started SCREAMING at the tv screen. And I became incensed when Kraig started LAUGHING.
You know what's worth being "live"? When exciting LIVE stuff happens!
OJ and his bronco
Random shootings in LA
Hurricanes and other natural disasters
A PRE-PLANNED SPEECH does NOT have to be live! You know what that's called? A TV SHOW! You know what we do with TV shows? We give them time slots!
WHO THE F*CK INTERUPTS A TV SHOW WITH A PRE-WRITTEN SPEECH?!! AND THEN READS IT LIVE?!! Does it make a diff that it was live?!! NO!!!
And yeah, it was broadcast tv...BUT....have you ever shoved an antenna on top of your tv?! So maybe i'm not paying for that channel, but i'm paying for it to come in CLEAR...and I wanted to see HOMER clear, not the EFFING STUPID HILLBILLY PRESIDENT!!!
Now if someone had SHOT him...that would be worth interrupting my show. Until then....mothereffer, book a time slot like every other effing tv show.
/rant
Last night I was stuck in traffic and i HAD to get to the vet in order to get Marmalade and Stash their prescription cat foods...so i call them begging them to hang out an extra 5 mins if i don't make it on time...some dude that I didn't recognize was all "we close and LEAVE at 6...AND we shut off the phones at 6..."...i wanted to say "you effing little snot, I can buy that sh*t anywhere but i choose to get it from this vet because I like him..."...
So when I got there (amazingly on time), the guy was like "see? You hauled ass and you made it"...like i wasn't already planning on hauling ass ANYWAY. I got the impression he was the vet's son in town for the holidays, and I probably would have flipped on him if I didn't suddenly have a "two wrongs don't make a right" attitude, which keep in mind...
I firmly believe two wrongs make a right. So...you punched me. Does punching you back make me feel better? Yes. Does it even the score? Yes.
You killed my kid? Yeah hunting you down like a dog and torturing you most CERTAINLY makes a right....
Stealing from "the man" because the man is stealing my youth certainly makes things right.
/second_rant
Well if i can't do husband bashing, i can certainly play the We All Know You've Got A Problem, Why Attempt To Hide It Game:
1. To the limp noodle guy: I thought it was me. But you kept putting the condom on WAY too early. So that meant you thought it was supposed to be that way. You know what?! It's NOT. And you know what? Stop saying "ohhh yeahhh you like it hard..." because one day a girl might say "um yes, can you make it?!"...
2. To the white out guy: I only put up with you because you were my friend's brother. And you were protective of me, and I dig that. Okay so we didn't go all the way, but there's a reason: fully strong, you were the size of a white out bottle. And that's OKAY...really, it's not your fault mother nature gave you the shaft (ha ha...okay bad pun)...but just don't keep saying "yeah you like it big!"....because one day a girl might say "um yes, and you're not it"...
3. To the hotel guy: Listen, there's a REASON my girlfriends nicknamed you "Bry-ann Toucan"...your nose was horrific. And okay so maybe yu're not as vain as me and you didn't want plastic surgery even though you REALLY needed it. But when I ASKED you whether there's any part ofyou that you would change, saying "well my skin is too pale" is NOT the correct answer....the right answer was staring at you in the face (ha ha bad pun)...there is nothing worse than sleeping with a guy with a big nose and then watching him SNEEZE right after. That was the deal breaker.
4. To the 4% body fat guy: it wasn't so much that you were ridiculously thin. It was that your ankles/calves were smaller than mine. And that's not cool. So eat a flippin' burger. With butter. And a pile of lard. Girls don't like boys with teenie calves and teenie ankles. Okay the real problem was that you WHINED and that in combo with the ankles was bad. PLUS...you drove you mom's Tercel. Any self respecting guy would steal his dad's Camaro to go on a date.
5. To the Intern: we had fun, don't get me wrong...but this whole "one pump chump" thing had to stop. Okay I'll give you credit, you acknowledged it. But....take care of that crap before I come over in order to at least make it last more than 1 milisecond. I'm not picky on time, I swear. I just want a full "thrust and out"...not just..."thrust"...
6. To the pierced dude: ohhhhhh you have your thing. I'll give you that. And what you have was FABULOUS. But no matter how hot it was, what you have....it doesn't make you any more manly when the last image I have of you is on all fours, in the bushes, yelling at your naughty kitty to go back inside. I tried to overlook a single guy having a cat (I mean, you mentioned you were married before...maybe it was her cat)...but you kill the afterglow when you're screaming "bad kitty! bad kitty! get back inside! get out of there!"....I hollered "see ya", walked down that driveway, and never looked back.
7. To the mustang guy: okay no real beef other than yes, I'm on to you...I know you thought we were going to sleep together and that's why i didn't hear from you for awhile after our date (which was a horrible date and NOT because of me...i'm sparkling and cute and witty on first dates...bitch!)...you totally thought I was a whore, but I proved you wrong...I wasn't gonna be YOUR whore.
8. To the dude who ended up on The Bachelor: yeah you were SUPER hot. SUPER SMOKIN' hot (by Ottawa standards anyway). But...you were SUCH an effing bad kisser. Like really bad. And i specifically thought "please don't ask me for my phone number, becuase you're so hot i'll be forced to give it to you, but please don't"...and you asked...and you REMEMBERED it (I didn't even write it down)...but you were an effing TOOL. And you were a bad, bad, bad, bad, BAD BAD BAD kisser. Kissing is so important jackass. You wouldn't have had to go on the Bachelor if at least you could kiss a girl decently.
C'mon guys...just admit your flaws. We know they're there. Just own up to them. Otherwise we'll think you're a clueless p*ssy.
End of that note, onto another....
So on Sunday I flipped to the Simpsons, and mother effer it was your stupid ass hillbilly president speaking.
LIVE.
How do I know? Because it said "LIVE" on the corner of the screen.
HE WAS READING OFF A TELEPROMPTER
I started SCREAMING at the tv screen. And I became incensed when Kraig started LAUGHING.
You know what's worth being "live"? When exciting LIVE stuff happens!
OJ and his bronco
Random shootings in LA
Hurricanes and other natural disasters
A PRE-PLANNED SPEECH does NOT have to be live! You know what that's called? A TV SHOW! You know what we do with TV shows? We give them time slots!
WHO THE F*CK INTERUPTS A TV SHOW WITH A PRE-WRITTEN SPEECH?!! AND THEN READS IT LIVE?!! Does it make a diff that it was live?!! NO!!!
And yeah, it was broadcast tv...BUT....have you ever shoved an antenna on top of your tv?! So maybe i'm not paying for that channel, but i'm paying for it to come in CLEAR...and I wanted to see HOMER clear, not the EFFING STUPID HILLBILLY PRESIDENT!!!
Now if someone had SHOT him...that would be worth interrupting my show. Until then....mothereffer, book a time slot like every other effing tv show.
/rant
Last night I was stuck in traffic and i HAD to get to the vet in order to get Marmalade and Stash their prescription cat foods...so i call them begging them to hang out an extra 5 mins if i don't make it on time...some dude that I didn't recognize was all "we close and LEAVE at 6...AND we shut off the phones at 6..."...i wanted to say "you effing little snot, I can buy that sh*t anywhere but i choose to get it from this vet because I like him..."...
So when I got there (amazingly on time), the guy was like "see? You hauled ass and you made it"...like i wasn't already planning on hauling ass ANYWAY. I got the impression he was the vet's son in town for the holidays, and I probably would have flipped on him if I didn't suddenly have a "two wrongs don't make a right" attitude, which keep in mind...
I firmly believe two wrongs make a right. So...you punched me. Does punching you back make me feel better? Yes. Does it even the score? Yes.
You killed my kid? Yeah hunting you down like a dog and torturing you most CERTAINLY makes a right....
Stealing from "the man" because the man is stealing my youth certainly makes things right.
/second_rant
Well if i can't do husband bashing, i can certainly play the We All Know You've Got A Problem, Why Attempt To Hide It Game:
1. To the limp noodle guy: I thought it was me. But you kept putting the condom on WAY too early. So that meant you thought it was supposed to be that way. You know what?! It's NOT. And you know what? Stop saying "ohhh yeahhh you like it hard..." because one day a girl might say "um yes, can you make it?!"...
2. To the white out guy: I only put up with you because you were my friend's brother. And you were protective of me, and I dig that. Okay so we didn't go all the way, but there's a reason: fully strong, you were the size of a white out bottle. And that's OKAY...really, it's not your fault mother nature gave you the shaft (ha ha...okay bad pun)...but just don't keep saying "yeah you like it big!"....because one day a girl might say "um yes, and you're not it"...
3. To the hotel guy: Listen, there's a REASON my girlfriends nicknamed you "Bry-ann Toucan"...your nose was horrific. And okay so maybe yu're not as vain as me and you didn't want plastic surgery even though you REALLY needed it. But when I ASKED you whether there's any part ofyou that you would change, saying "well my skin is too pale" is NOT the correct answer....the right answer was staring at you in the face (ha ha bad pun)...there is nothing worse than sleeping with a guy with a big nose and then watching him SNEEZE right after. That was the deal breaker.
4. To the 4% body fat guy: it wasn't so much that you were ridiculously thin. It was that your ankles/calves were smaller than mine. And that's not cool. So eat a flippin' burger. With butter. And a pile of lard. Girls don't like boys with teenie calves and teenie ankles. Okay the real problem was that you WHINED and that in combo with the ankles was bad. PLUS...you drove you mom's Tercel. Any self respecting guy would steal his dad's Camaro to go on a date.
5. To the Intern: we had fun, don't get me wrong...but this whole "one pump chump" thing had to stop. Okay I'll give you credit, you acknowledged it. But....take care of that crap before I come over in order to at least make it last more than 1 milisecond. I'm not picky on time, I swear. I just want a full "thrust and out"...not just..."thrust"...
6. To the pierced dude: ohhhhhh you have your thing. I'll give you that. And what you have was FABULOUS. But no matter how hot it was, what you have....it doesn't make you any more manly when the last image I have of you is on all fours, in the bushes, yelling at your naughty kitty to go back inside. I tried to overlook a single guy having a cat (I mean, you mentioned you were married before...maybe it was her cat)...but you kill the afterglow when you're screaming "bad kitty! bad kitty! get back inside! get out of there!"....I hollered "see ya", walked down that driveway, and never looked back.
7. To the mustang guy: okay no real beef other than yes, I'm on to you...I know you thought we were going to sleep together and that's why i didn't hear from you for awhile after our date (which was a horrible date and NOT because of me...i'm sparkling and cute and witty on first dates...bitch!)...you totally thought I was a whore, but I proved you wrong...I wasn't gonna be YOUR whore.
8. To the dude who ended up on The Bachelor: yeah you were SUPER hot. SUPER SMOKIN' hot (by Ottawa standards anyway). But...you were SUCH an effing bad kisser. Like really bad. And i specifically thought "please don't ask me for my phone number, becuase you're so hot i'll be forced to give it to you, but please don't"...and you asked...and you REMEMBERED it (I didn't even write it down)...but you were an effing TOOL. And you were a bad, bad, bad, bad, BAD BAD BAD kisser. Kissing is so important jackass. You wouldn't have had to go on the Bachelor if at least you could kiss a girl decently.
C'mon guys...just admit your flaws. We know they're there. Just own up to them. Otherwise we'll think you're a clueless p*ssy.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Random thoughts and gripes...oh wait that's the blog name
Just some randomness...
This site: Chronicles of George is effing awesome. Thanks to Evan for that one.
I can't believe the past 2 weeks I've been sleeping nonstop and haven't gone to the gym. I actually fell asleep wearing my gym clothes last night. WTF.
The song of the day is Every Little Thing I Do by Soul for Real
Every little thing I do, you're on my mind
The way I feel lately, it's driving me crazy
Every little thing I do, you're on my mind
I can't get over you, I think about you all the time
Yeah old skool!
And yes, we all knew Gwen was pregnant, she was showing big time lately. Good for her for keeping it quiet for the 3 months at least.
Apparently the spells from the Psychic and her Witch Sister worked for both Nicoles. Hmmm...I need to cast a "gimme some money bad!" spell, but for the cost of everything ($20) I would need to come across an extra $20 just to break even. And last time we did that we got a money tree which is barely surviving and I'm still out like $6.
(Okay i guess technically that could have been worse...the $6 was for the vase it was in, the IKEA people didn't think to take the plant out of it to scan that too).
So here's the list of purchases I'd like to make in 2006, in no particular order:
1. New toilets
2. New tiles in the upstairs bathroom (and rip up the carpet that I stained)
3. New vacuum
4. Botox
5. Garage shelves
6. yay maybe laminate flooring (which means i'll have to rip up the WEE bit of legit hardwood that I have)
7. Nissan Murano
Sigh!
This site: Chronicles of George is effing awesome. Thanks to Evan for that one.
I can't believe the past 2 weeks I've been sleeping nonstop and haven't gone to the gym. I actually fell asleep wearing my gym clothes last night. WTF.
The song of the day is Every Little Thing I Do by Soul for Real
Every little thing I do, you're on my mind
The way I feel lately, it's driving me crazy
Every little thing I do, you're on my mind
I can't get over you, I think about you all the time
Yeah old skool!
And yes, we all knew Gwen was pregnant, she was showing big time lately. Good for her for keeping it quiet for the 3 months at least.
Apparently the spells from the Psychic and her Witch Sister worked for both Nicoles. Hmmm...I need to cast a "gimme some money bad!" spell, but for the cost of everything ($20) I would need to come across an extra $20 just to break even. And last time we did that we got a money tree which is barely surviving and I'm still out like $6.
(Okay i guess technically that could have been worse...the $6 was for the vase it was in, the IKEA people didn't think to take the plant out of it to scan that too).
So here's the list of purchases I'd like to make in 2006, in no particular order:
1. New toilets
2. New tiles in the upstairs bathroom (and rip up the carpet that I stained)
3. New vacuum
4. Botox
5. Garage shelves
6. yay maybe laminate flooring (which means i'll have to rip up the WEE bit of legit hardwood that I have)
7. Nissan Murano
Sigh!
Monday, December 19, 2005
My blog needs a vacation. Bad.
Only 7 more shopping days until....Holiday
From Thanksgiving...note to self: (using I'm Rick James Bitch! voice): Use Powder Bitch!
So in the spirit of the top 5 guys on my laminated card, I'm bored enough to create a Top 5 Chicks I'd Do If I Could On My Laminated Card A La Friend:
(and yes, in order counting down):
5. Charlize Theron although i think she'd be too amazon for me
4. Mila Kunis
3. Natalie Portman As long as she doesn't bring her head shaved
3.1 Maria Menounos She's like your pretty best friend. You want to hate her...but you can't because she's so effing nice and fun.
2. Jessica ALba okay so she's had a boob job...whatever. She's AWESOME in Never Been Kissed.
1. Aishwarya Rai Quite possibly the most stunning person the planet. Not that I want to get naked with her...i just want to know what it's like to be in the presence of someone THAT stunning.
I'll get off my ass and blog about those things that guys find romantic whenever I find the napkin that I wrote it down on.....
From Thanksgiving...note to self: (using I'm Rick James Bitch! voice): Use Powder Bitch!
So in the spirit of the top 5 guys on my laminated card, I'm bored enough to create a Top 5 Chicks I'd Do If I Could On My Laminated Card A La Friend:
(and yes, in order counting down):
5. Charlize Theron although i think she'd be too amazon for me
4. Mila Kunis
3. Natalie Portman As long as she doesn't bring her head shaved
3.1 Maria Menounos She's like your pretty best friend. You want to hate her...but you can't because she's so effing nice and fun.
2. Jessica ALba okay so she's had a boob job...whatever. She's AWESOME in Never Been Kissed.
1. Aishwarya Rai Quite possibly the most stunning person the planet. Not that I want to get naked with her...i just want to know what it's like to be in the presence of someone THAT stunning.
I'll get off my ass and blog about those things that guys find romantic whenever I find the napkin that I wrote it down on.....
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Holy crap
Geezus....
Series of events....
You realize there's a very, very, VERY fine line between life and death....
Happiness is so fleeting, it takes almost nothing to change everything....
Your life as you know it can turn at any moment....
I wonder....the whole point isn't the life itself...but how you handle each bend and curve of that road...? Is it life when it's standing still that matters, or what happened up to that part, or what will happen after? Is it the snapshot or the plot?
Maybe my new year's resolution won't be about refinement and elegance and grace (but the botox IS still important!!)...maybe it'll be what do I want people to remember about me when I go, and then work towards that in case I get hit by a bus on New Year's 2006...
Series of events....
You realize there's a very, very, VERY fine line between life and death....
Happiness is so fleeting, it takes almost nothing to change everything....
Your life as you know it can turn at any moment....
I wonder....the whole point isn't the life itself...but how you handle each bend and curve of that road...? Is it life when it's standing still that matters, or what happened up to that part, or what will happen after? Is it the snapshot or the plot?
Maybe my new year's resolution won't be about refinement and elegance and grace (but the botox IS still important!!)...maybe it'll be what do I want people to remember about me when I go, and then work towards that in case I get hit by a bus on New Year's 2006...
Friday, December 16, 2005
A blog, a girl, and a pizza place
So went to lunch today with 3 coworkers and Stefanie....
And something that was brought up....how chicks will laugh at your jokes initially than after awhile no matter HOW funny the joke is, the chick won't laugh.
That, I will agree 100%. Poor Kraig. He used to be SO funny in my mind. Now...he could write for the Simpsons and I still wouldn't laugh. He's hosed on that one.
That being said, there's a TON of things that one gender used to do and in return the other doesn't either. You know why? It's like Crazy Fun Girl. Initially, you do that stuff with a purpose. Then....
Guys: she used to laugh at my jokes. Now, I can't say anything that won't make her roll her eyes.
Girls: He used to always pay for dinner or we'd split. Now i'm the one paying for everything.
Guys: She used to dress all sexy for me. Now it's just track pants or her Lion King boxers.
Girls: He used to write me super romantic letters/texts/emails. I don't get any of that anymore!
Guys: She used to have sexy long hair. Now...it's cut all short! (alternative: she wears in a bun/blob all the time!)
Girls: He used to have a HOT body. Now he sits around, drinks beer, and does nothing.
Guys: she used to want to go out! Now we never go out and have fun.
Girls: he used to want to go out! Now we never go out and have fun.
So you see....men can bitch all they want about how chicks, over time, things start to suck....yeah well it goes both ways.
What's the moral of the story?
Find someone that you can still love and adore and want to snuggle with even after all of the above stuff (whether it's guys or girls) goes downhill. And when I snuggle, damn right it's with my Lion King shorts!!!
And something that was brought up....how chicks will laugh at your jokes initially than after awhile no matter HOW funny the joke is, the chick won't laugh.
That, I will agree 100%. Poor Kraig. He used to be SO funny in my mind. Now...he could write for the Simpsons and I still wouldn't laugh. He's hosed on that one.
That being said, there's a TON of things that one gender used to do and in return the other doesn't either. You know why? It's like Crazy Fun Girl. Initially, you do that stuff with a purpose. Then....
Guys: she used to laugh at my jokes. Now, I can't say anything that won't make her roll her eyes.
Girls: He used to always pay for dinner or we'd split. Now i'm the one paying for everything.
Guys: She used to dress all sexy for me. Now it's just track pants or her Lion King boxers.
Girls: He used to write me super romantic letters/texts/emails. I don't get any of that anymore!
Guys: She used to have sexy long hair. Now...it's cut all short! (alternative: she wears in a bun/blob all the time!)
Girls: He used to have a HOT body. Now he sits around, drinks beer, and does nothing.
Guys: she used to want to go out! Now we never go out and have fun.
Girls: he used to want to go out! Now we never go out and have fun.
So you see....men can bitch all they want about how chicks, over time, things start to suck....yeah well it goes both ways.
What's the moral of the story?
Find someone that you can still love and adore and want to snuggle with even after all of the above stuff (whether it's guys or girls) goes downhill. And when I snuggle, damn right it's with my Lion King shorts!!!
Happy Blog-vakah!
I swear, the Internet is the most amazing invention EVER. Makes me wish I were a student again: Assessing Risk - When and When Not to Beat It
Now onto more important things....the OC....
Now if you watch the OC, you know the Chrismukkah episode is the motherload of all episodes. Last night's was okay...and I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks it lacked edge AND thinks Johnny is a pain in the ass whiney little bitch:
Tonight hinted that the show might pay some more attention to Summer's parent-related drama, and if that's correct then I really hope last year's short-lived rumors were true and that Demi Moore will play Summer's infamous pill-popping stepmonster. She'll be a good replacement for Johnny once the O.C. staff figures out a suitable way to kill him and/or have him move to the Midwest, à la Anna and Lindsay. Wait, he still has the gun, right? The writers should make him watch that surfing footage of his old, non-gimp body on a constant loop until he gets the right idea and offs himself. (from EW.com).
That Johnny guy started out awesome....he was cute in a "skinny guy" kind of way (even skinnier than Seth, gasp...maybe even skinnier than Marissa). But the dude gets hit by a car and suddenly he's the biggest gimp on the planet. Give me a break. You managed to drive a car didn't you?! Shut your piehole and go back to school and stop relying on surfing potentials...that's why your parents always told you that you "need something to fall back on" when you begged them to be an artist/guitarist/model/Professional-TV-Watcher.
That being said, Ryan is REALLY starting to grow on me. Most likely because he looks so much more manly next to Johnny. Or maybe because he hasn't been pulling his "I'm from Chino and we punch people every other episode" bs. Or maybe it's because he actually SPEAKS as opposed to giving those Unsure-Are-You-Checking-Out-My-Girlfriend-I'm-From-Chino-I'll-Punch-You-Every-Other-Episode looks. Either way, I'm diggin' the short hair and the excessive dialogue from him.
But of course...in the end...it's all about Seth. My boy.
I'm not sure if I'm down with the Julie Cooper + Summer's Dad plotline...I mean, it's hilarious, but I hate when they only purpose of showing a character who's been around forever is just so they can play the convenient love interest. You know who they need to show more often? The trailor park guy who lives by Julie. Now i dig that guy. AND he's got a cockfight tradition. You can't beat that. Well maybe you can beat it....with a chicken...
On another note, it looks like I'll actually manage to pull enough money out of my ass to pay my credit card bill in full. MOO HA HA HA HAAAAA....when it's me vs. Credit Card Companies...don't mess with me. I refuse to let you have my money for interest. Booyah.
The song of the day is That's What Friends Are For by Dionne Warwick....because that's the BarMitzvakah way.
Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
In good times in bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for
Now onto more important things....the OC....
Now if you watch the OC, you know the Chrismukkah episode is the motherload of all episodes. Last night's was okay...and I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks it lacked edge AND thinks Johnny is a pain in the ass whiney little bitch:
Tonight hinted that the show might pay some more attention to Summer's parent-related drama, and if that's correct then I really hope last year's short-lived rumors were true and that Demi Moore will play Summer's infamous pill-popping stepmonster. She'll be a good replacement for Johnny once the O.C. staff figures out a suitable way to kill him and/or have him move to the Midwest, à la Anna and Lindsay. Wait, he still has the gun, right? The writers should make him watch that surfing footage of his old, non-gimp body on a constant loop until he gets the right idea and offs himself. (from EW.com).
That Johnny guy started out awesome....he was cute in a "skinny guy" kind of way (even skinnier than Seth, gasp...maybe even skinnier than Marissa). But the dude gets hit by a car and suddenly he's the biggest gimp on the planet. Give me a break. You managed to drive a car didn't you?! Shut your piehole and go back to school and stop relying on surfing potentials...that's why your parents always told you that you "need something to fall back on" when you begged them to be an artist/guitarist/model/Professional-TV-Watcher.
That being said, Ryan is REALLY starting to grow on me. Most likely because he looks so much more manly next to Johnny. Or maybe because he hasn't been pulling his "I'm from Chino and we punch people every other episode" bs. Or maybe it's because he actually SPEAKS as opposed to giving those Unsure-Are-You-Checking-Out-My-Girlfriend-I'm-From-Chino-I'll-Punch-You-Every-Other-Episode looks. Either way, I'm diggin' the short hair and the excessive dialogue from him.
But of course...in the end...it's all about Seth. My boy.
I'm not sure if I'm down with the Julie Cooper + Summer's Dad plotline...I mean, it's hilarious, but I hate when they only purpose of showing a character who's been around forever is just so they can play the convenient love interest. You know who they need to show more often? The trailor park guy who lives by Julie. Now i dig that guy. AND he's got a cockfight tradition. You can't beat that. Well maybe you can beat it....with a chicken...
On another note, it looks like I'll actually manage to pull enough money out of my ass to pay my credit card bill in full. MOO HA HA HA HAAAAA....when it's me vs. Credit Card Companies...don't mess with me. I refuse to let you have my money for interest. Booyah.
The song of the day is That's What Friends Are For by Dionne Warwick....because that's the BarMitzvakah way.
Keep smiling, keep shining
Knowing you can always count on me, for sure
That's what friends are for
In good times in bad times
I'll be on your side forever more
That's what friends are for
Thursday, December 15, 2005
How to woo a blog
So after writing an email about something I realized I actually feel somewhat passionate on the subject...and thus, blog-worthy.
What is romantic when you're in high school is NOT always what's romantic to a chick when she's 30
The following is a list of things that's romantic when you're in high school:
1. Prom. Mostly because it's the only time you have an excuse to look REALLY nice. And get a hotel room...or at least, lose your virginity....or at least, get laid while you look REALLY nice.
As an adult...the closest thing to that would be a company party, which everyone can agree is NOT a romantic night. You can't make out with anyone (that whole "professionalism" thing), you can't dress super sexy (that whole "professionalism" thing), and these are people that you probably hate most of the time anyway. PLUS...your date is most likely your spouse or long term boyfriend, in which case, it's not like you have to wonder if you're gonna get laid that night.
2. Rose petals on the bed....oooh ahhhh just like in the movies....ooohhh so romantic.
Um yeah as an adult, odds are that's MY bed...and rose petals effing stain. And who does the laundry? Exactly. As an adult, only do bed-staining-activities when you're in a hotel. Or if it's your own bed and you don't care if you do the laundry or just toss them altogether.
3. Unhooking the bra. Bear with me on this one. I had a conversation with my friend back in highschool about how it pissed us off when guys just PUSHED your bra up to get to the goods...wtf...get off your lazy ass and unhook that sucker. It HURTS when you push it up, it really does. Especially when it's underwire. In high school, we were SO happy when we found a guy who knew how to unhook and didn't just shove stuff around.
As an adult....the art of unhooking isn't "romantic". It's just....a mechanism. If you're in your 20s/30s and you're still pushing the bra UP...that's more than just unromantic, that's "you're a moron and not worthy of seeing my boobs anyway"....
4. When he's out of gum but lets you have half of his (when he's already chewing it). AND NO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO TOOK GUM OUT OF OTHER GUY'S MOUTHS. If i'm kissing the dude anyway, what's the diff.
As an adult...umm yeah no. Obviously. I can get my own gum. Fresh gum is a requirement.
5. Taking showers together. Yeah that's hot 'cause that means you actually get to get naked somewhere other than the bedroom for the whole 2 seconds you're parents aren't at home.
As an adult...listen, argue with me if you want, i don't care. But unless there's two showerheads, showering together is NOT romantic. SOmeone always freezes! Or as someone else pointed out...it's NOT romantic when a guy washes your hair...you end up feeling like you have to re-do it anyway. PLUS...if i'm in the shower, odds are i need to shave my legs, so i end up pre-showering just to look good for the "real" shower...eff that. You take a shower, I'll take a shower...unless it's a fancy showerhead, it's just one of thsoe things that looks great in the movies.
And...speaking of things that look great in the movies...
6. Sex in a pool. Yeah soooo sexy when you're in high school. Just like the movies.
As an adult: do i even NEED to tell you how bad that is for your gonads?! And there's friction issues. No, not romantic at ALL.
7. Food in the bedroom. Whipped cream. Stuff like that. Yeah it's sexy 'cause it gives you an excuse to LICK body parts. I get it.
As an adult....well it all depends if it's her bedsheets or not. Extra laundry is NOT worth the extra calories from whipped cream. Plus the stuff from a can tastes like sh*t anyway, and i doubt anyone's going to run to the kitchen to grab a mixer and make fresh whip cream.
Things that were romantic in high school and are STILL romantic now:
1. Handwritten love letters. Sigh. I sure hope highschool kids now don't resort to email love letters. There's nothing better than laying on your bed with a note that's all creased and folded/unfolded a million times....that never gets old. Dang my heart is racing right now just remembering times that I've done that....staring at a letter for hours, memerizing every curl and twist of the ink...Note: this also includes poems. They may be cheesy, but dang it's romantic.
2. Flowers. Now keep in mind, I'm biased because I worked in a flower shop and part of me runs in fear when i see a bouquet of roses (I got so desensitized, i could grab a bunch of roses, thorns and all, without feeling a thing...my hands had SO many holes in them)...but a single rose can still make my heart pound....and I still dry them upside down like i used to back in high school.
3. Candles....you know, somehow guys in highschool know to do this and yet, wtf, the novelty wears off when you're an adult? C'mon guys! Ambiance is always good. Not always needed, but it can't hurt. Just make sure they're not like Glade air freshner candles or anything. That would be retarded.
4. Jewelry. In highschool a plain itty bitty ring made us shiver....it still works as an adult. In fact, other than an engagement ring, most often less is more. A teenie chain bracelet with a teenie charm on it is SO much more appreciated than some big chunky ass bracelet. It's not the cost...it's just whatever is least-tacky.
What is romantic now that you may not have even thought of when you were in high school:
1. Cleaning the house. Or apartment. Or your car. Anything that means MY time is free to either spend it with you or spend it doing something fun for myself is so insanely romantic.
2. General thoughtfulness. Such as bringing an extra jacket when you know she's probably gonna be cold. Thoughtfulness is not something the average teenager even notices, but it's SOOO appreciated as an adult. It's getting out of the car and filling up the car with gas because you know our shoes will get wreaked if it's raining. It's picking up another coffee when you're already getting one for yourself. It's ordering your side dish a certain way because you know she'll probably mooch of off it anyway.
3. Specific compliments. In high school usually it's "you're so pretty" blah blah. Eff that crap. By the time you're 30 you want to hear "you have fantastic legs" or "you skin is unbelievably soft"....yeah jackasses, get specific. So we know you mean US...not Random Girl X.
4. General sillyness. Maybe that's just general behavior anyway in high school. But sometimes just being playful and silly and random is the most romantic thing in the world, because for that brief moment you're forgetting all the crap that makes up Being A Grown Up and allows you to be super close to someone else in a way that can't even be described or qualified.
The song of the day is Freak Me by Silk....since everyone my age had sex to that song at some point in high school 'cause well hey, we thought it was sexy....now it just makes me laugh when i hear it.
Let me lick you up and down till you say stop
Let me play with your body baby make you real hot
Let me do all the things you want me to do
Cause tonight baby I wanna get freaky with you
What is romantic when you're in high school is NOT always what's romantic to a chick when she's 30
The following is a list of things that's romantic when you're in high school:
1. Prom. Mostly because it's the only time you have an excuse to look REALLY nice. And get a hotel room...or at least, lose your virginity....or at least, get laid while you look REALLY nice.
As an adult...the closest thing to that would be a company party, which everyone can agree is NOT a romantic night. You can't make out with anyone (that whole "professionalism" thing), you can't dress super sexy (that whole "professionalism" thing), and these are people that you probably hate most of the time anyway. PLUS...your date is most likely your spouse or long term boyfriend, in which case, it's not like you have to wonder if you're gonna get laid that night.
2. Rose petals on the bed....oooh ahhhh just like in the movies....ooohhh so romantic.
Um yeah as an adult, odds are that's MY bed...and rose petals effing stain. And who does the laundry? Exactly. As an adult, only do bed-staining-activities when you're in a hotel. Or if it's your own bed and you don't care if you do the laundry or just toss them altogether.
3. Unhooking the bra. Bear with me on this one. I had a conversation with my friend back in highschool about how it pissed us off when guys just PUSHED your bra up to get to the goods...wtf...get off your lazy ass and unhook that sucker. It HURTS when you push it up, it really does. Especially when it's underwire. In high school, we were SO happy when we found a guy who knew how to unhook and didn't just shove stuff around.
As an adult....the art of unhooking isn't "romantic". It's just....a mechanism. If you're in your 20s/30s and you're still pushing the bra UP...that's more than just unromantic, that's "you're a moron and not worthy of seeing my boobs anyway"....
4. When he's out of gum but lets you have half of his (when he's already chewing it). AND NO I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO TOOK GUM OUT OF OTHER GUY'S MOUTHS. If i'm kissing the dude anyway, what's the diff.
As an adult...umm yeah no. Obviously. I can get my own gum. Fresh gum is a requirement.
5. Taking showers together. Yeah that's hot 'cause that means you actually get to get naked somewhere other than the bedroom for the whole 2 seconds you're parents aren't at home.
As an adult...listen, argue with me if you want, i don't care. But unless there's two showerheads, showering together is NOT romantic. SOmeone always freezes! Or as someone else pointed out...it's NOT romantic when a guy washes your hair...you end up feeling like you have to re-do it anyway. PLUS...if i'm in the shower, odds are i need to shave my legs, so i end up pre-showering just to look good for the "real" shower...eff that. You take a shower, I'll take a shower...unless it's a fancy showerhead, it's just one of thsoe things that looks great in the movies.
And...speaking of things that look great in the movies...
6. Sex in a pool. Yeah soooo sexy when you're in high school. Just like the movies.
As an adult: do i even NEED to tell you how bad that is for your gonads?! And there's friction issues. No, not romantic at ALL.
7. Food in the bedroom. Whipped cream. Stuff like that. Yeah it's sexy 'cause it gives you an excuse to LICK body parts. I get it.
As an adult....well it all depends if it's her bedsheets or not. Extra laundry is NOT worth the extra calories from whipped cream. Plus the stuff from a can tastes like sh*t anyway, and i doubt anyone's going to run to the kitchen to grab a mixer and make fresh whip cream.
Things that were romantic in high school and are STILL romantic now:
1. Handwritten love letters. Sigh. I sure hope highschool kids now don't resort to email love letters. There's nothing better than laying on your bed with a note that's all creased and folded/unfolded a million times....that never gets old. Dang my heart is racing right now just remembering times that I've done that....staring at a letter for hours, memerizing every curl and twist of the ink...Note: this also includes poems. They may be cheesy, but dang it's romantic.
2. Flowers. Now keep in mind, I'm biased because I worked in a flower shop and part of me runs in fear when i see a bouquet of roses (I got so desensitized, i could grab a bunch of roses, thorns and all, without feeling a thing...my hands had SO many holes in them)...but a single rose can still make my heart pound....and I still dry them upside down like i used to back in high school.
3. Candles....you know, somehow guys in highschool know to do this and yet, wtf, the novelty wears off when you're an adult? C'mon guys! Ambiance is always good. Not always needed, but it can't hurt. Just make sure they're not like Glade air freshner candles or anything. That would be retarded.
4. Jewelry. In highschool a plain itty bitty ring made us shiver....it still works as an adult. In fact, other than an engagement ring, most often less is more. A teenie chain bracelet with a teenie charm on it is SO much more appreciated than some big chunky ass bracelet. It's not the cost...it's just whatever is least-tacky.
What is romantic now that you may not have even thought of when you were in high school:
1. Cleaning the house. Or apartment. Or your car. Anything that means MY time is free to either spend it with you or spend it doing something fun for myself is so insanely romantic.
2. General thoughtfulness. Such as bringing an extra jacket when you know she's probably gonna be cold. Thoughtfulness is not something the average teenager even notices, but it's SOOO appreciated as an adult. It's getting out of the car and filling up the car with gas because you know our shoes will get wreaked if it's raining. It's picking up another coffee when you're already getting one for yourself. It's ordering your side dish a certain way because you know she'll probably mooch of off it anyway.
3. Specific compliments. In high school usually it's "you're so pretty" blah blah. Eff that crap. By the time you're 30 you want to hear "you have fantastic legs" or "you skin is unbelievably soft"....yeah jackasses, get specific. So we know you mean US...not Random Girl X.
4. General sillyness. Maybe that's just general behavior anyway in high school. But sometimes just being playful and silly and random is the most romantic thing in the world, because for that brief moment you're forgetting all the crap that makes up Being A Grown Up and allows you to be super close to someone else in a way that can't even be described or qualified.
The song of the day is Freak Me by Silk....since everyone my age had sex to that song at some point in high school 'cause well hey, we thought it was sexy....now it just makes me laugh when i hear it.
Let me lick you up and down till you say stop
Let me play with your body baby make you real hot
Let me do all the things you want me to do
Cause tonight baby I wanna get freaky with you
I caught your blog
removing what i wrote, because i need to be stealth...long story
I'm in hysterics laughing. I guess i'm just effed in the head. Carrie ALWAYS knows how to make me bust a gut.
I'm in hysterics laughing. I guess i'm just effed in the head. Carrie ALWAYS knows how to make me bust a gut.
Monday, December 12, 2005
Your blog is way bored if you read this
THE LAST TIME YOU:
Really smiled: Can't remember. Probably sometime this morning at some of my emails.
Cried: You don't wanna know.
Danced: Lol Sat night at Nicole's work party
Watched your favorite movie: about a month ago...gasp i'm due to watch it again.
Had a nightmare: The past week...I think it was the one where Ryan had a party and there was green slime.
Last thing you had to drink: Water...I just came back from teh gym.
Last time you showered: This morning, but i'm going agian in 2 mins.
Last thing you ate: toast with margerine
NORMAL STUFF:
Name: Duhhh...
Do you like it?: Nope
Nicknames: UGH...Bean...beanbag...beaner...bina...
Sign: Leo but no, i'm not a strong willed individual.
Location: OC
Status: uh...alive?
Natural hair color: dark brown
Current hair color: even darker brown
Eye color: brown, but a guy once told me that my eyes weren't "dark enough"...as in, i didn't have pretty eyes. Thanks jackass.
Height: short. 5'2.5
Birthplace: Winnipeg
shoe size: 5.5
FAVORITES:
Number: 44
Color: ugh it varies...blood red...violet...baby pink...baby blue...lately I'm on a black kick.
Day: Friday around 11am.
Month: wtf I don't know...May i guess.
Song: too many to list. Lady Hear Me Tonight probably.
Movie: Clueless...Desperado...Joy Luck Club...T2...yadda yadda the list goes on
Season: Summer
Class: anything biology or chemistry...i like knowing how crap works.
Teacher: Mr. Macartney, my hot biology teacher in highschool.
Drink: Diet pepsi, no ice. Diggin' the Scooby Snacks now though.
Veggie: wtf kind of retarded question is that. Does a mushroom count?
Radio Station: I'm thinking of going to Sirius. I need Howard.
Store: Target...Express...when i'm jonesin' for a top to wear for just one night, Forever21...
Animal: cats all the way! Although i'm beginning to finally grow fond of dogs.
Flower: Calla Lillies and blue irises
State: I don't like ANY of them. So cali if i had to choose.
LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS:
Do you have a gf/bf? I'm married mother effer.
Do you have a crush? That kind of goes with the territory.
How long have you liked him/her? A long long time.
Who was your first love? That jackass that i want to beat with a crowbar if i ever saw him again. That's what you get when you give 3 years of your life to a dude who lost his virginity to his sister...who beat up a kid in a wheelchair...who sold drugs to pay the bills (the tip off was when his MOM kept saying "you put your weed in it!")....who had a half-circumsized penis...who tried to convince me that his gay roommate molested him (the dude worked at Club Monaco and gave me his discount. I'll take the roommate's word over his)...the one who thanks to his OTHER girlfriend, i got a black eye on my 18th birthday...the one who I had to resort to getting my bodybuilder friends to get my money back....um yeah that one.
PAST:
What is the one thing you would change about your past?: Without knowing waht I know now (otherwise i would have invested my cash in stuff that obviously went big!)....I wouldn't have moved to the US.
Last thing you heard: The sound of my computer's fan.
Last thing you saw: Kraig coming hom at midnight from work
Last thing you said: "Yes" (in response to "did the cats get fed?")
Who is the last person you hugged? Henry, yesterday.
Who is the last person you fought with? Who do you think....
Who is the last person you were on the phone with: a DJ for our holiday party
What is the last TV show you saw?: Sex and the City...it was on the TV at the gym
What is the last song you heard? Groovy Kind Of Love on the radio
FUTURE:
What day is it tomorrow? Tuesday
What are you going to do after this? Shower. Then do some work.
Who are you going to talk to? Kraig and the cats
What is one of your dreams? lol NOT something I'm going to put in a blog
Where will you be in 25 years? Hopefully at the plastic surgeon getting tweaked
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON:
You instant messaged: probably my mom
You laughed with? probably my coworkers
Who broke your heart? Can your heart be broken by someone you're still with? It can be broken and fixed right?
OTHER:
Do you write in cursive or print?: a mix of both.
Are you a lefty or a righty?: righty
What piercings do you have?: my ears (done 3 times), my belly button (the piercing is out but i want to put soemthing else in it)
Any tattoos? oh hell no.
Do you have glasses or contacts?: both
Did you like this survey? not really
PHYSICAL APPEARANCES:
Do you look like any celebrities? NO NOT EVA LONGORIA...think Sophia Coppolla
Do you wear a watch?: sometimes. "A watch doesn't really go with this outfit daddy"
How many coats and jackets do you own? a ton
Favorite pants/skirt? Dress pants: my black ones from CM....jeans: just a casual pair from Old Navy....skirt: my black one from Jacob
Most expensive item of clothing: my wedding gown. After that...my ski jacket. After that...some dresses. After that....other random coats. After that...I think my XOXO skirt that I've worn maybe ONCE in my life.
What kind of shoes do you wear?: anything and everthing. I'm a shoe whore.
Really smiled: Can't remember. Probably sometime this morning at some of my emails.
Cried: You don't wanna know.
Danced: Lol Sat night at Nicole's work party
Watched your favorite movie: about a month ago...gasp i'm due to watch it again.
Had a nightmare: The past week...I think it was the one where Ryan had a party and there was green slime.
Last thing you had to drink: Water...I just came back from teh gym.
Last time you showered: This morning, but i'm going agian in 2 mins.
Last thing you ate: toast with margerine
NORMAL STUFF:
Name: Duhhh...
Do you like it?: Nope
Nicknames: UGH...Bean...beanbag...beaner...bina...
Sign: Leo but no, i'm not a strong willed individual.
Location: OC
Status: uh...alive?
Natural hair color: dark brown
Current hair color: even darker brown
Eye color: brown, but a guy once told me that my eyes weren't "dark enough"...as in, i didn't have pretty eyes. Thanks jackass.
Height: short. 5'2.5
Birthplace: Winnipeg
shoe size: 5.5
FAVORITES:
Number: 44
Color: ugh it varies...blood red...violet...baby pink...baby blue...lately I'm on a black kick.
Day: Friday around 11am.
Month: wtf I don't know...May i guess.
Song: too many to list. Lady Hear Me Tonight probably.
Movie: Clueless...Desperado...Joy Luck Club...T2...yadda yadda the list goes on
Season: Summer
Class: anything biology or chemistry...i like knowing how crap works.
Teacher: Mr. Macartney, my hot biology teacher in highschool.
Drink: Diet pepsi, no ice. Diggin' the Scooby Snacks now though.
Veggie: wtf kind of retarded question is that. Does a mushroom count?
Radio Station: I'm thinking of going to Sirius. I need Howard.
Store: Target...Express...when i'm jonesin' for a top to wear for just one night, Forever21...
Animal: cats all the way! Although i'm beginning to finally grow fond of dogs.
Flower: Calla Lillies and blue irises
State: I don't like ANY of them. So cali if i had to choose.
LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS:
Do you have a gf/bf? I'm married mother effer.
Do you have a crush? That kind of goes with the territory.
How long have you liked him/her? A long long time.
Who was your first love? That jackass that i want to beat with a crowbar if i ever saw him again. That's what you get when you give 3 years of your life to a dude who lost his virginity to his sister...who beat up a kid in a wheelchair...who sold drugs to pay the bills (the tip off was when his MOM kept saying "you put your weed in it!")....who had a half-circumsized penis...who tried to convince me that his gay roommate molested him (the dude worked at Club Monaco and gave me his discount. I'll take the roommate's word over his)...the one who thanks to his OTHER girlfriend, i got a black eye on my 18th birthday...the one who I had to resort to getting my bodybuilder friends to get my money back....um yeah that one.
PAST:
What is the one thing you would change about your past?: Without knowing waht I know now (otherwise i would have invested my cash in stuff that obviously went big!)....I wouldn't have moved to the US.
Last thing you heard: The sound of my computer's fan.
Last thing you saw: Kraig coming hom at midnight from work
Last thing you said: "Yes" (in response to "did the cats get fed?")
Who is the last person you hugged? Henry, yesterday.
Who is the last person you fought with? Who do you think....
Who is the last person you were on the phone with: a DJ for our holiday party
What is the last TV show you saw?: Sex and the City...it was on the TV at the gym
What is the last song you heard? Groovy Kind Of Love on the radio
FUTURE:
What day is it tomorrow? Tuesday
What are you going to do after this? Shower. Then do some work.
Who are you going to talk to? Kraig and the cats
What is one of your dreams? lol NOT something I'm going to put in a blog
Where will you be in 25 years? Hopefully at the plastic surgeon getting tweaked
WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON:
You instant messaged: probably my mom
You laughed with? probably my coworkers
Who broke your heart? Can your heart be broken by someone you're still with? It can be broken and fixed right?
OTHER:
Do you write in cursive or print?: a mix of both.
Are you a lefty or a righty?: righty
What piercings do you have?: my ears (done 3 times), my belly button (the piercing is out but i want to put soemthing else in it)
Any tattoos? oh hell no.
Do you have glasses or contacts?: both
Did you like this survey? not really
PHYSICAL APPEARANCES:
Do you look like any celebrities? NO NOT EVA LONGORIA...think Sophia Coppolla
Do you wear a watch?: sometimes. "A watch doesn't really go with this outfit daddy"
How many coats and jackets do you own? a ton
Favorite pants/skirt? Dress pants: my black ones from CM....jeans: just a casual pair from Old Navy....skirt: my black one from Jacob
Most expensive item of clothing: my wedding gown. After that...my ski jacket. After that...some dresses. After that....other random coats. After that...I think my XOXO skirt that I've worn maybe ONCE in my life.
What kind of shoes do you wear?: anything and everthing. I'm a shoe whore.
The working man's blog
Grumble.
I'm SO over this whole "have a job, earn money, pay bills, do this till you die" thing.
I get it. You need to get a job. You have to make money to survive. You have to climb that corporate ladder. Yadda yadda. I GET IT. I learned the moral of the story.
The novelty has long since worn off. I'm almost 30. I've been working since I was 13. The longest break of unemployment I've ever had was one semester in university becuase I was taking SEVEN mother effing courses (so not exactly a "break", more like "no time to eat sleep breathe work think").
I get the point. I GET IT. Work = money = no homeless Sabina. I get it. Can I stop now?! Can I finally just sleep in? Can I finally stop spending the majority of my waking life at work?
I mean, don't get me wrong. I dig my job...I have the best coworkers...blah blah. But...hmmm getting up in the morning to go to work vs. sleeping in....watching soaps....playing with my cats...giving myself a pedicure....reading all the books I keep saying I'll read but never get a chance to....heck, even go back to school....
Yeah I'll take the latter option. I got the lesson of life. Is there a test? Did I pass? Am I done yet?
Being a grownup effing blows goats.
On another note, it seems that Nic D was correct....whole life insurance (as opposed to term) is the way to go, so that when you're old if you don't give a crap about your life insurance anymore you can withdraw from it...sounds good to me. I need something to look forward to when i'm old and decrepit. Now I just gotta squeeze some more juice out of my bank account to PAY for life insurance. Um yeah I guess that's where "see above comments on having a JOB" comes into play.
You need to get over LIFE
Yeah that sounds pretty good right about now. Teen angst rears it's ugly head and yet, sometimes it just makes sense.
I'm SO over this whole "have a job, earn money, pay bills, do this till you die" thing.
I get it. You need to get a job. You have to make money to survive. You have to climb that corporate ladder. Yadda yadda. I GET IT. I learned the moral of the story.
The novelty has long since worn off. I'm almost 30. I've been working since I was 13. The longest break of unemployment I've ever had was one semester in university becuase I was taking SEVEN mother effing courses (so not exactly a "break", more like "no time to eat sleep breathe work think").
I get the point. I GET IT. Work = money = no homeless Sabina. I get it. Can I stop now?! Can I finally just sleep in? Can I finally stop spending the majority of my waking life at work?
I mean, don't get me wrong. I dig my job...I have the best coworkers...blah blah. But...hmmm getting up in the morning to go to work vs. sleeping in....watching soaps....playing with my cats...giving myself a pedicure....reading all the books I keep saying I'll read but never get a chance to....heck, even go back to school....
Yeah I'll take the latter option. I got the lesson of life. Is there a test? Did I pass? Am I done yet?
Being a grownup effing blows goats.
On another note, it seems that Nic D was correct....whole life insurance (as opposed to term) is the way to go, so that when you're old if you don't give a crap about your life insurance anymore you can withdraw from it...sounds good to me. I need something to look forward to when i'm old and decrepit. Now I just gotta squeeze some more juice out of my bank account to PAY for life insurance. Um yeah I guess that's where "see above comments on having a JOB" comes into play.
You need to get over LIFE
Yeah that sounds pretty good right about now. Teen angst rears it's ugly head and yet, sometimes it just makes sense.
My blog does the splits
YES
YES
YES
Just bought advanced tix to see Cirque du Soleil in march...yessss....so far i've seen almost all the shows (well ever since i saw my first once, Varekai, i've seen every single one since), my goal is to see all the ones in Vegas too and then i'll be good to go.
Sweet.
It's Quidam in case anyone cares.
I LOVE ACROBATS WHO DO CRAZY SH*T WITH THEIR BODIES.
Unfortunately since I'm poor as dirt, i had to get the crappies cheap seats, but they're still way low down (I took the Sunday afternoon one...better than say a Fri or Sat night show) and more in the center so I think we'll be okay.
YES
YES
Just bought advanced tix to see Cirque du Soleil in march...yessss....so far i've seen almost all the shows (well ever since i saw my first once, Varekai, i've seen every single one since), my goal is to see all the ones in Vegas too and then i'll be good to go.
Sweet.
It's Quidam in case anyone cares.
I LOVE ACROBATS WHO DO CRAZY SH*T WITH THEIR BODIES.
Unfortunately since I'm poor as dirt, i had to get the crappies cheap seats, but they're still way low down (I took the Sunday afternoon one...better than say a Fri or Sat night show) and more in the center so I think we'll be okay.
To tell your future, let me look in my crystal blog
So this was a "request blog"....
On Sunday me, the NIcoles, our gay hairdressor Henri and his friend Gina went to Long Beach to see the psychic.
Mother.
Effer.
Don't even get me started on waht should have been an AM thing ended up getting us all home after 5pm....
Or how I accidentally left my Anal Beads (which I bought to prove a point to some coworkers) at the psychic....that effing sucks.
But the REAL blog is how Henry insists that every guy loves a golden shower. Guys REALLY like it. And he insists it's not just gay guys.
Now first off, this is Henry/Henri...you gotta take 99% of what he says with a grain of salt. That being said, he REALLY went into detail of waht it was like, and how you have this feeling of power, and how men love it because they feel all this warmth and...eww well you get the point.
I have never, EVER, ever had a guy request that of me. I probably would have projectile vomitted.
So i'm like "but....it's a bit MESSY don't you think?" and he said that you just put alot of garbage bags everywhere. Well first off, I used to have my cat's litterbox on a plastic garbage bag 'cause when she had diabetes, she would sometimes pee outside the box...um yeah liquid on a plastic bag is NOT easy to clean up, it spills and slips everywhere. And humans pee a boatload more than cats! So wtf!
Henry then said the bathroom...and I"m like "okay the only place that would make sense would be the bathtub. And then someone's gotta SCRUB the bathtub after. That's just not worth it!"....
I guess logistically i'm not sure how that works out. I asked my husband about this (I mean, who am I to deny my man pleasure if that's what he wants?) and he was like "uhh...no" and was clearly disapproving of me spending too much time with my flamboyantly gay hairdressor. He also pointed out taht some men like poop smeared all over them, but don't expect ALL guys to like that. I don't know why I'm even writing that last line, but I thought it was funny and he was also super annoyed with the ideas that were put in my head.
On another note, yes I'll do the Listerine test....although I really think Wintergreen mints are the tried-and-true standby. But....if Henry insists Listerine is better, then I'll do the test and find out.
DANG i'm peeved about those anal beads! Plus i had a coupon for Quizno's in the bag. Double dammit. And lol, NO i was not going to use those beads (as far as i'm concerned, that's an exit zone), it was to prove a point to some people.
One last note on the psychic....geezus....we were DYING of allergies. I barely HAVE allergies and my eyes were going to pop out of my head. We had to wait outside while each girl got her reading, because the incense, candles, and nonstop cigarette smoke was killing us. There were like 5 cats in the place and i'm sure they're going to be effed up from all that smoke. On cat had a dislocated jaw and just kept walking around drooling with it's tongue hung out. Two other cats slept in the window, and the male cat kept trying to mount the female...and she was gonna have none of that...but the poor guy just kept trying and trying to hump her...
I was so wiped after the whole day that I didn't go to the gym, instead I sat downa nd wrote 99% of all the holiday cards I had to write. I can't believe DH wasn't on, wtf.
The song of the day is Funky Cold Medina by Tone Loc (it was playing on the radio)
So I took her to my crib, and everything went well as planned But when she got undressed, it was a big old mess, Sheena was a man So I threw him out, I don't fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener You must be sure that the girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina
On Sunday me, the NIcoles, our gay hairdressor Henri and his friend Gina went to Long Beach to see the psychic.
Mother.
Effer.
Don't even get me started on waht should have been an AM thing ended up getting us all home after 5pm....
Or how I accidentally left my Anal Beads (which I bought to prove a point to some coworkers) at the psychic....that effing sucks.
But the REAL blog is how Henry insists that every guy loves a golden shower. Guys REALLY like it. And he insists it's not just gay guys.
Now first off, this is Henry/Henri...you gotta take 99% of what he says with a grain of salt. That being said, he REALLY went into detail of waht it was like, and how you have this feeling of power, and how men love it because they feel all this warmth and...eww well you get the point.
I have never, EVER, ever had a guy request that of me. I probably would have projectile vomitted.
So i'm like "but....it's a bit MESSY don't you think?" and he said that you just put alot of garbage bags everywhere. Well first off, I used to have my cat's litterbox on a plastic garbage bag 'cause when she had diabetes, she would sometimes pee outside the box...um yeah liquid on a plastic bag is NOT easy to clean up, it spills and slips everywhere. And humans pee a boatload more than cats! So wtf!
Henry then said the bathroom...and I"m like "okay the only place that would make sense would be the bathtub. And then someone's gotta SCRUB the bathtub after. That's just not worth it!"....
I guess logistically i'm not sure how that works out. I asked my husband about this (I mean, who am I to deny my man pleasure if that's what he wants?) and he was like "uhh...no" and was clearly disapproving of me spending too much time with my flamboyantly gay hairdressor. He also pointed out taht some men like poop smeared all over them, but don't expect ALL guys to like that. I don't know why I'm even writing that last line, but I thought it was funny and he was also super annoyed with the ideas that were put in my head.
On another note, yes I'll do the Listerine test....although I really think Wintergreen mints are the tried-and-true standby. But....if Henry insists Listerine is better, then I'll do the test and find out.
DANG i'm peeved about those anal beads! Plus i had a coupon for Quizno's in the bag. Double dammit. And lol, NO i was not going to use those beads (as far as i'm concerned, that's an exit zone), it was to prove a point to some people.
One last note on the psychic....geezus....we were DYING of allergies. I barely HAVE allergies and my eyes were going to pop out of my head. We had to wait outside while each girl got her reading, because the incense, candles, and nonstop cigarette smoke was killing us. There were like 5 cats in the place and i'm sure they're going to be effed up from all that smoke. On cat had a dislocated jaw and just kept walking around drooling with it's tongue hung out. Two other cats slept in the window, and the male cat kept trying to mount the female...and she was gonna have none of that...but the poor guy just kept trying and trying to hump her...
I was so wiped after the whole day that I didn't go to the gym, instead I sat downa nd wrote 99% of all the holiday cards I had to write. I can't believe DH wasn't on, wtf.
The song of the day is Funky Cold Medina by Tone Loc (it was playing on the radio)
So I took her to my crib, and everything went well as planned But when she got undressed, it was a big old mess, Sheena was a man So I threw him out, I don't fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener You must be sure that the girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina
Sunday, December 11, 2005
First, Sub-zero...now, BLOG-zero!
It's 1:00am and I want credit for going to the gym after Nicole's work party! (Of which, thanks to the wonderful world of roulette...we got enough tix to win Nicole $100!! We kicked ass tonight).
Boatloads of stuff I have to remember to blog about later when I don't have to effing shower and then wrap Kraig's gifts while he's playing D&D downstairs....
At the gym I read Cosmo, Stuff, and Budget Living...they had a mention of the video game version of Fear Factor (it was in their "oh hell no" category)...ummm yeah Kraig's company was/is making that game, and even the people MAKING it think it's retarded and will never get out the door. I find it surprising that it even got enough buzz to be mentioned in Stuff.
The song of the day is Brown Eyed Girl, 'cause I was dancing with Nicole and her coworker Erin at the tables tonight.
Props to Anna...the uber-bitchy-but-super-cool table dealer person...he was a nazi with the table but dang, she liked her style. She told a joke and when I wisecracked that it was maybe a true story, she screamed in her thick accent "OF COURSE NOT! I'M GREAT IN BED!"....Happy Birthday Anna. Hope you enjoy your champagne and men tomorrow night.
American roulette wheels have two "0's", zero and double-zero, which increases the house advantage to 5.4%. In European roulette there is only one zero, giving the house an advantage of 2.7%.
(Wikipedia)
Boatloads of stuff I have to remember to blog about later when I don't have to effing shower and then wrap Kraig's gifts while he's playing D&D downstairs....
At the gym I read Cosmo, Stuff, and Budget Living...they had a mention of the video game version of Fear Factor (it was in their "oh hell no" category)...ummm yeah Kraig's company was/is making that game, and even the people MAKING it think it's retarded and will never get out the door. I find it surprising that it even got enough buzz to be mentioned in Stuff.
The song of the day is Brown Eyed Girl, 'cause I was dancing with Nicole and her coworker Erin at the tables tonight.
Props to Anna...the uber-bitchy-but-super-cool table dealer person...he was a nazi with the table but dang, she liked her style. She told a joke and when I wisecracked that it was maybe a true story, she screamed in her thick accent "OF COURSE NOT! I'M GREAT IN BED!"....Happy Birthday Anna. Hope you enjoy your champagne and men tomorrow night.
American roulette wheels have two "0's", zero and double-zero, which increases the house advantage to 5.4%. In European roulette there is only one zero, giving the house an advantage of 2.7%.
(Wikipedia)
Friday, December 09, 2005
IM with my mom
MY_MOM: hi there
MY_MOM: here is ((Childhood friend, but she was the daughter of my dad's friend)) phone nr.: xxx-xxx-xxx
MY_MOM: guess u are busy again, see u
ME: why would i call her
ME: I dont' call people.
MY_MOM: hi there
MY_MOM: well in case u are in san fran and might want to meet her
ME: okay
MY_MOM: like it doesnt do any harm to keep the number in your phonebook
ME: ok
MY_MOM: 76 us$ per person for quarbani, dad wanted to know whether u are going to send a cheque?
ME: sure. who do i make it out to?
MY_MOM: either to me, or dad.... we put the money in our account and then forward it to a person in cornwall who telegraphs it to some madrassa in india. they give the entire amount to the poor, no administration fees, everyone does it for free
ME: ok i'll send it
MY_MOM: ((my mom's full name)).... or.... ((my dad's full name))
ME: um yeah i know your name
MY_MOM: we got a joint account
MY_MOM: ((smiley face))
MY_MOM: cute smiley
MY_MOM: like here all those big so called charities deduct 20 % at least for administration
ME: ok
MY_MOM: over here its more like a business
ME: ok
MY_MOM: the president of united ways earned in the 70s already $ 100 000
ME: ok
MY_MOM: then they have to pay employees, advertising costs a fortune, then they have some big celebrity as a spokesperson, they dont do that for free either
ME: ok
MY_MOM: that way people are inspired and say.... look at that she'he does it for free.... not so, there was a thing the other day about it on tv... making people think that way
ME: ok
MY_MOM: thats how princess diana made millions, she was the spokesperson of countless charity organizations, yet everyone thought she was such an angel
ME: ok
MY_MOM: people adored her and were willing to give freely
MY_MOM: i thought so too, that they all lending their name for free until then
MY_MOM: they have so much money, i think they should do it for free
ME: ok
MY_MOM: not just expect the ordinary working people to give what ever little they can
ME: ok
MY_MOM: lol
MY_MOM: u are busy?
ME: no
MY_MOM: ok
MY_MOM: good, was a bit worried i might bother u, since u just write ok all the time
MY_MOM: but then what is there to say to that
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
MY_MOM: love that devil
MY_MOM: snowing a lot today, what are u doing this weekend?
ME: going to a friend's work party
MY_MOM: nice, have fun
ME: i plan on it
MY_MOM: sure hope u dont let others talk u into drinking booz
MY_MOM: is kraig coming too?
ME: no you can only bring one person to a company party. it's not a free for all.
MY_MOM: k
MY_MOM: just thought a partner can come along maybe
MY_MOM: is it a christmas party?
ME: well if i'm going with my friend, and i'm the partner, why would the partner get to bring a partner?!
ME: yes it's a holiday party
MY_MOM: k
MY_MOM: oh i didnt read it right, i thought it had something to do with your work
ME: no it's a friend's work
MY_MOM: i got it hehe
MY_MOM: how is my marmalade?
ME: she's fine
MY_MOM: stashi pooh still so cute?
ME: yup
MY_MOM: marmalade is so cute, wish she wouldnt have that problem, she still would be here, even dad liked her
ME: ok
MY_MOM: but if i go down to visit u people and i'm away for a while, if she would have pee'd on the sofa or anywhere else, dad wouldnt have had the patience to clean it up, he would have been mad
ME: ok
MY_MOM: he likes smokey now too, alway's worry's about him when he is outside
MY_MOM: i'm surprised how good he actually is with smokey
MY_MOM: like he wasnt that patient before
ME: ok
MY_MOM: kids are having lunch break and playing outside
MY_MOM: seems eons have passed since u went there
ME: it's been almost 20 years
MY_MOM: man oh man
MY_MOM: 20 years younger, what i wouldnt give for that
MY_MOM: i hate getting old
ME: yup
MY_MOM: yup?
ME: yup getting old is bad
MY_MOM: u dont have anything to worry yet, wish i was your age only
MY_MOM: i would kill for that
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
ME: ok
MY_MOM: man i feel evil today
MY_MOM: snow stopped, sun just came out, -3, perfect ski weather today
ME: you don't ski
MY_MOM: for those that do
ME: those that do probably have to work today
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
MY_MOM: hehe good
MY_MOM: anyway, i let u go, say hi to kraig, hug those babies of yours for me, especially a big one for marmalade
MY_MOM: have a nice weekend
ME: ok
MY_MOM: here is ((Childhood friend, but she was the daughter of my dad's friend)) phone nr.: xxx-xxx-xxx
MY_MOM: guess u are busy again, see u
ME: why would i call her
ME: I dont' call people.
MY_MOM: hi there
MY_MOM: well in case u are in san fran and might want to meet her
ME: okay
MY_MOM: like it doesnt do any harm to keep the number in your phonebook
ME: ok
MY_MOM: 76 us$ per person for quarbani, dad wanted to know whether u are going to send a cheque?
ME: sure. who do i make it out to?
MY_MOM: either to me, or dad.... we put the money in our account and then forward it to a person in cornwall who telegraphs it to some madrassa in india. they give the entire amount to the poor, no administration fees, everyone does it for free
ME: ok i'll send it
MY_MOM: ((my mom's full name)).... or.... ((my dad's full name))
ME: um yeah i know your name
MY_MOM: we got a joint account
MY_MOM: ((smiley face))
MY_MOM: cute smiley
MY_MOM: like here all those big so called charities deduct 20 % at least for administration
ME: ok
MY_MOM: over here its more like a business
ME: ok
MY_MOM: the president of united ways earned in the 70s already $ 100 000
ME: ok
MY_MOM: then they have to pay employees, advertising costs a fortune, then they have some big celebrity as a spokesperson, they dont do that for free either
ME: ok
MY_MOM: that way people are inspired and say.... look at that she'he does it for free.... not so, there was a thing the other day about it on tv... making people think that way
ME: ok
MY_MOM: thats how princess diana made millions, she was the spokesperson of countless charity organizations, yet everyone thought she was such an angel
ME: ok
MY_MOM: people adored her and were willing to give freely
MY_MOM: i thought so too, that they all lending their name for free until then
MY_MOM: they have so much money, i think they should do it for free
ME: ok
MY_MOM: not just expect the ordinary working people to give what ever little they can
ME: ok
MY_MOM: lol
MY_MOM: u are busy?
ME: no
MY_MOM: ok
MY_MOM: good, was a bit worried i might bother u, since u just write ok all the time
MY_MOM: but then what is there to say to that
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
MY_MOM: love that devil
MY_MOM: snowing a lot today, what are u doing this weekend?
ME: going to a friend's work party
MY_MOM: nice, have fun
ME: i plan on it
MY_MOM: sure hope u dont let others talk u into drinking booz
MY_MOM: is kraig coming too?
ME: no you can only bring one person to a company party. it's not a free for all.
MY_MOM: k
MY_MOM: just thought a partner can come along maybe
MY_MOM: is it a christmas party?
ME: well if i'm going with my friend, and i'm the partner, why would the partner get to bring a partner?!
ME: yes it's a holiday party
MY_MOM: k
MY_MOM: oh i didnt read it right, i thought it had something to do with your work
ME: no it's a friend's work
MY_MOM: i got it hehe
MY_MOM: how is my marmalade?
ME: she's fine
MY_MOM: stashi pooh still so cute?
ME: yup
MY_MOM: marmalade is so cute, wish she wouldnt have that problem, she still would be here, even dad liked her
ME: ok
MY_MOM: but if i go down to visit u people and i'm away for a while, if she would have pee'd on the sofa or anywhere else, dad wouldnt have had the patience to clean it up, he would have been mad
ME: ok
MY_MOM: he likes smokey now too, alway's worry's about him when he is outside
MY_MOM: i'm surprised how good he actually is with smokey
MY_MOM: like he wasnt that patient before
ME: ok
MY_MOM: kids are having lunch break and playing outside
MY_MOM: seems eons have passed since u went there
ME: it's been almost 20 years
MY_MOM: man oh man
MY_MOM: 20 years younger, what i wouldnt give for that
MY_MOM: i hate getting old
ME: yup
MY_MOM: yup?
ME: yup getting old is bad
MY_MOM: u dont have anything to worry yet, wish i was your age only
MY_MOM: i would kill for that
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
ME: ok
MY_MOM: man i feel evil today
MY_MOM: snow stopped, sun just came out, -3, perfect ski weather today
ME: you don't ski
MY_MOM: for those that do
ME: those that do probably have to work today
MY_MOM: ((devil face on yahoo IM))
MY_MOM: hehe good
MY_MOM: anyway, i let u go, say hi to kraig, hug those babies of yours for me, especially a big one for marmalade
MY_MOM: have a nice weekend
ME: ok
my blog hates myspace
I swear I rarely check my myspace page because honestly, other than reconnecting with people who I haven't from in ages there's really no point to it (It's not like i'm hooking up or anything). That being said, i do get a fair amount of people emailing me for whatever reasons and i really do reply.
That being said, i thought this was interesting, because i can't figure out if this was a typical "copy and paste and send to every chick on Myspace" or if this is actually somewhat personalized. I swear i hate myspace:
Sabina,
I just read your profile and wanted to thank you. Even if you can't get back to me (you love your husband, think he is hot and my name is not Brad) I wanted you to know:
A) you have an engaging smile
B) you filled out a great profile
C) I think I can help
Help how? By coming up with a headline for you. You deserve one. If I do so and you use it I am going to need you to get back to me and be charming. That's our deal. More on that later.
I am sitting here at work a little bored and slightly hung over, contemplating either hitting the steam room or actually working out, browsing through my new favorite toy - myspace profiles and lo and behold I see a familiar, smiling face. I open the profile and am reminded that you seem to be an interesting woman! This, of course, guarantees I will not get a response from you because that is the karma we call myspace. So if you choose not to respond and leave me with coal at Christmas, then understand I enjoyed your profile the most today.
If you do decide to respond I have a few questions:
1) How did a saeemingly down-to-earth girl like you end up in the social whirlwind of South OC?
2) No plastic surgery? Are they going to kick you out of your "community"?
3) Tanning booth, Spray on or actual sun?
4) Are thongs and g strings the same thing?
5) What do you think will go out of style first, long wife beaters or lowrise jeans?
6) Annoying cat person and annoying canadian? Good thing you are attractive.
Ok. After reading your profile and looking at the headlines of your blog have some up with......
"Great White North Meets South Orange County"
or....
"My guilty pleasures are (somewhat) innocent"
Just trying to keep it interesting, superstar. Hit me back and I might solve the mystery of me.
I gotta give the person credit...it's pretty well written (compared to the average myspace user who clearly knows JACK on how to write an email). Snaps to you "Cash".
That being said, i thought this was interesting, because i can't figure out if this was a typical "copy and paste and send to every chick on Myspace" or if this is actually somewhat personalized. I swear i hate myspace:
Sabina,
I just read your profile and wanted to thank you. Even if you can't get back to me (you love your husband, think he is hot and my name is not Brad) I wanted you to know:
A) you have an engaging smile
B) you filled out a great profile
C) I think I can help
Help how? By coming up with a headline for you. You deserve one. If I do so and you use it I am going to need you to get back to me and be charming. That's our deal. More on that later.
I am sitting here at work a little bored and slightly hung over, contemplating either hitting the steam room or actually working out, browsing through my new favorite toy - myspace profiles and lo and behold I see a familiar, smiling face. I open the profile and am reminded that you seem to be an interesting woman! This, of course, guarantees I will not get a response from you because that is the karma we call myspace. So if you choose not to respond and leave me with coal at Christmas, then understand I enjoyed your profile the most today.
If you do decide to respond I have a few questions:
1) How did a saeemingly down-to-earth girl like you end up in the social whirlwind of South OC?
2) No plastic surgery? Are they going to kick you out of your "community"?
3) Tanning booth, Spray on or actual sun?
4) Are thongs and g strings the same thing?
5) What do you think will go out of style first, long wife beaters or lowrise jeans?
6) Annoying cat person and annoying canadian? Good thing you are attractive.
Ok. After reading your profile and looking at the headlines of your blog have some up with......
"Great White North Meets South Orange County"
or....
"My guilty pleasures are (somewhat) innocent"
Just trying to keep it interesting, superstar. Hit me back and I might solve the mystery of me.
I gotta give the person credit...it's pretty well written (compared to the average myspace user who clearly knows JACK on how to write an email). Snaps to you "Cash".
My blog's five chicks he'd do....
Well I know my husband well. When i asked him to tell me his five for his laminated card a la Friends, he wrote:
Jessica Alba
Eva Longoria
Are the only two people that really jump out at me as I don’t really think about this sort of thing so I don’t try to keep mental notes on a list that is silly and would never actually use.
I take great offense to that. And he'll regret it when Jessica ALba turns him down and then say Charlize Theron attempts to seduce him.
Jessica Alba
Eva Longoria
Are the only two people that really jump out at me as I don’t really think about this sort of thing so I don’t try to keep mental notes on a list that is silly and would never actually use.
I take great offense to that. And he'll regret it when Jessica ALba turns him down and then say Charlize Theron attempts to seduce him.
Tyra, Heidi, and my Blog
I'm going to be a traitor to my gender and say that I love this commercial, and I think it's effective:
Thrill me
Surprise me
Dazzle me
Delight me
Please me
Tease me
Give me days I'll always remember
and nights I'll never forget
Give me everything I want
and nothing that I need
Give me you
you
you
It almost makes me want to roll around in bed with perfectly coiffed hair wearing Victoria's Secret. ALMOST.
Thrill me
Surprise me
Dazzle me
Delight me
Please me
Tease me
Give me days I'll always remember
and nights I'll never forget
Give me everything I want
and nothing that I need
Give me you
you
you
It almost makes me want to roll around in bed with perfectly coiffed hair wearing Victoria's Secret. ALMOST.
Oh my God! They killed my blog!
So apparently the masses are quite upset that I think Ryan Reynolds is hot. I don't see where the confusion lies....why does everyone keep saying "Ryan Reynolds?! What?!" to me?!!! The dude is super hot, he's got great hair, and he's always playing a witty-yet-sarcastic type...i dig that. Did I mention his hair?
What-eva! I do what i want!
Something to point out from Entertainment Weekly online's recap of the OC:
Dream on, dude. Matt still really bugs me. There's something about his face I don't like. It could just be his face.
YES YES YES. I knew it. He is NOT good looking. He's bizarre. He's like a messed up version of Christian Bale. He's making Ryan look hot. Actually, I'm starting to think Ryan's not that bad looking. He's no Seth....but...he's growing on me. Maybe it's because he's either around that ugly Matt guy or that skinny Johnny guy.
Maybe there should be another rule for men (speaking of Johnny)....I don't care if you got hit by a car. Stop acting like a flippin' p*ssy when you're pouring yourself water. In fact, poor people don't use glass pitchers. I know. I'm poor. I use Rubbermaid. Or my pitcher i got from the Dollar Store. So that whole "oh whoa is me i slipped and broke glass Marissa can you help me" thing is BS. Ryan's got nothing to worry about...Johnny crashed his way into the Friend Bucket on his own.
Six days and counting until Chrismukkah. I'm declaring Thursday Wear Your Yarmaclaus to Work Day. Dress appropriately.
I need me a yarmaclaus.
Don't think I forgot about that gorgeous, GORGEOUS bracelet...I think about it almost every day...I got a coupon from the jewelry store that sells it, but it's only $60 off...um yeah that won't help me when that bracelet is a few grand. OH MY GOD it was gorgeous. SIgh.
What-eva! I do what i want!
Something to point out from Entertainment Weekly online's recap of the OC:
Dream on, dude. Matt still really bugs me. There's something about his face I don't like. It could just be his face.
YES YES YES. I knew it. He is NOT good looking. He's bizarre. He's like a messed up version of Christian Bale. He's making Ryan look hot. Actually, I'm starting to think Ryan's not that bad looking. He's no Seth....but...he's growing on me. Maybe it's because he's either around that ugly Matt guy or that skinny Johnny guy.
Maybe there should be another rule for men (speaking of Johnny)....I don't care if you got hit by a car. Stop acting like a flippin' p*ssy when you're pouring yourself water. In fact, poor people don't use glass pitchers. I know. I'm poor. I use Rubbermaid. Or my pitcher i got from the Dollar Store. So that whole "oh whoa is me i slipped and broke glass Marissa can you help me" thing is BS. Ryan's got nothing to worry about...Johnny crashed his way into the Friend Bucket on his own.
Six days and counting until Chrismukkah. I'm declaring Thursday Wear Your Yarmaclaus to Work Day. Dress appropriately.
I need me a yarmaclaus.
Don't think I forgot about that gorgeous, GORGEOUS bracelet...I think about it almost every day...I got a coupon from the jewelry store that sells it, but it's only $60 off...um yeah that won't help me when that bracelet is a few grand. OH MY GOD it was gorgeous. SIgh.
Thursday, December 08, 2005
Jingle blog, jingle blog, jingle blog rock
Two more things that need to be added my list from yesterday's blog:
Bath Poofs..I don't care if a guy uses soap, body wash, whatever (as long as he uses something of course!)...but bath poofs are for GIRLS. And yes, I knew a guy who used a bath poof. And it was disgusting because he never replaced it, he figured the anti-bacterial body wash negated the bacteria in the poof. Um yeah....no. And bath poofs are for GIRLS.
"Cute"...the only time a guy can call something cute is when he's talking about a girl. Or something on a girl (like her top). That's IT. Case in point: last night i finally caught up on Dr. 90210 and that stupid dude married to Dr. Lee said his OWN shorts were "cute". WHAT THE F*CK. I know the point was that he got a matching pair for the baby, but he said his OWN were cute. AND nothing on a baby boy should be described as cute by a man. Ever. Unless you're gay. Then you can also say "snap!" and "trash!" all you want.
That aside, onto the tv watching for the night....
Dr. 90210: yeah i finally saw the premiere. STefanie, you're right: Dr Rey's hair looks SOOOOOO much better with the highlights. And mother effer, his wife lost a BOATLOAD of weight after losing that kid...she used to be healthy-thin, now she's "send World Vision to her door"-thin...no wonder she doens't want a kid. And no wonder she's TIRED all the time...it's not from your birth control, it's 'cause you need a burger!
The other thing I realized is that people in general have BAD SKIN. Okay i give you props for going on Dr. 90210 and getting naked. But...i mean people have bad, bad skin. That one chick who was 32....geezus I'll shoot myself if my skin gets like that. I already use Nivea Renewal NIght Cream for my upper body at night and Nivea Reshaping treatment on my legs (of which, so far it's the best cellulite cream i've found so far)....so hopefully that'll keep things looking decent.
My plan is to finally clear out the spare bedroom over the xmas holidays, sell all my crap on ebay, and with that cash put it towards the Sabina's Botox Fund. Booyah.
America's Next Top Model: mannnnn I love that show. That being said, i can't BELIEVE Nik didn't win. I mean, you tell me who'd sell a product better:
or
I looooove Nik....I can't believe Nicole won...i'm so pissed. So i texted my coworker Caroline all night during the show, and when Nicole won I wrote:
"WTF! She steals granola bars!" and Caroline wrote: "they had to pick a white girl to be politically correct"
That made me laugh so effing hard, it almost compensated for how pissed I was that Nik didn't win.
Lost: Okay I still haven't seen last week's episode. I admit it. I'm really backlogged! It's not my fault.
My name is earl: Um yeah still backlogged on that too.
Tonight is OC NIGHT BABY! Maybe one day I'll convince Henry to let me have Mischa Barton's hair....this whole "Eva Longoria's ugly kid sister" hair isn't cutting it anymore.
And to reiterate, my top 5 guys on my laminated card:
1. Ryan Reynolds
2. The Rock
3. Nick Lachey
ugh this is where it gets sketchy....
4. Jimmy Fallon (he'd be fun.....)
4.1 Adam Brody (Okay really I just want Seth...but same diff. )
5. Matt Damon (he's hot, bite me)
5.1 Clive Owen (damn I'm a sucker for deep voice and a brit accent)
5.2 LL Cool J (those lips! That should be outlawed)
5.3 Paul Walker....this is one of those guys that you don't want to hear him speak, just shut up and look pretty
5.4 Sean William Scott ...yeah i know. Stifler. I think the boy is hot. Suck it.
And I knwo Ben Affleck has gone downhill, but i thought he was hot around Armeggedon. And Tom Cruise was WAY hot in his Cocktail years. And Antonio Banderas was UBER hot during his Desperado years. Mel Gibson way super hot during his Lethal Weapon years. Bruce Willis was hot in his Die Hard years. But...those times are gone, so they don't make the list.
I've bugged Kraig before for his list, the first time years ago he had Jennifer Conolly (sp), Halle Barry, Janet Jackson, and some playboy models. I asked him again this year and he had like Eva Longoria, Jessica Alba, and some other random chicks. In fact, i'm gonna email him now and give me his top 5 and i'll seriously put it on a laminated card for him.
Okay, nuff babbling for now. I've had alot on my mind. Suck it.
Song of the day: Stickwitu by PussyCat Dolls
Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u
Tazo count for Wednesday: 4
I'm not drinking enough this week...usually i'm average around 6.
Bath Poofs..I don't care if a guy uses soap, body wash, whatever (as long as he uses something of course!)...but bath poofs are for GIRLS. And yes, I knew a guy who used a bath poof. And it was disgusting because he never replaced it, he figured the anti-bacterial body wash negated the bacteria in the poof. Um yeah....no. And bath poofs are for GIRLS.
"Cute"...the only time a guy can call something cute is when he's talking about a girl. Or something on a girl (like her top). That's IT. Case in point: last night i finally caught up on Dr. 90210 and that stupid dude married to Dr. Lee said his OWN shorts were "cute". WHAT THE F*CK. I know the point was that he got a matching pair for the baby, but he said his OWN were cute. AND nothing on a baby boy should be described as cute by a man. Ever. Unless you're gay. Then you can also say "snap!" and "trash!" all you want.
That aside, onto the tv watching for the night....
Dr. 90210: yeah i finally saw the premiere. STefanie, you're right: Dr Rey's hair looks SOOOOOO much better with the highlights. And mother effer, his wife lost a BOATLOAD of weight after losing that kid...she used to be healthy-thin, now she's "send World Vision to her door"-thin...no wonder she doens't want a kid. And no wonder she's TIRED all the time...it's not from your birth control, it's 'cause you need a burger!
The other thing I realized is that people in general have BAD SKIN. Okay i give you props for going on Dr. 90210 and getting naked. But...i mean people have bad, bad skin. That one chick who was 32....geezus I'll shoot myself if my skin gets like that. I already use Nivea Renewal NIght Cream for my upper body at night and Nivea Reshaping treatment on my legs (of which, so far it's the best cellulite cream i've found so far)....so hopefully that'll keep things looking decent.
My plan is to finally clear out the spare bedroom over the xmas holidays, sell all my crap on ebay, and with that cash put it towards the Sabina's Botox Fund. Booyah.
America's Next Top Model: mannnnn I love that show. That being said, i can't BELIEVE Nik didn't win. I mean, you tell me who'd sell a product better:
or
I looooove Nik....I can't believe Nicole won...i'm so pissed. So i texted my coworker Caroline all night during the show, and when Nicole won I wrote:
"WTF! She steals granola bars!" and Caroline wrote: "they had to pick a white girl to be politically correct"
That made me laugh so effing hard, it almost compensated for how pissed I was that Nik didn't win.
Lost: Okay I still haven't seen last week's episode. I admit it. I'm really backlogged! It's not my fault.
My name is earl: Um yeah still backlogged on that too.
Tonight is OC NIGHT BABY! Maybe one day I'll convince Henry to let me have Mischa Barton's hair....this whole "Eva Longoria's ugly kid sister" hair isn't cutting it anymore.
And to reiterate, my top 5 guys on my laminated card:
1. Ryan Reynolds
2. The Rock
3. Nick Lachey
ugh this is where it gets sketchy....
4. Jimmy Fallon (he'd be fun.....)
4.1 Adam Brody (Okay really I just want Seth...but same diff. )
5. Matt Damon (he's hot, bite me)
5.1 Clive Owen (damn I'm a sucker for deep voice and a brit accent)
5.2 LL Cool J (those lips! That should be outlawed)
5.3 Paul Walker....this is one of those guys that you don't want to hear him speak, just shut up and look pretty
5.4 Sean William Scott ...yeah i know. Stifler. I think the boy is hot. Suck it.
And I knwo Ben Affleck has gone downhill, but i thought he was hot around Armeggedon. And Tom Cruise was WAY hot in his Cocktail years. And Antonio Banderas was UBER hot during his Desperado years. Mel Gibson way super hot during his Lethal Weapon years. Bruce Willis was hot in his Die Hard years. But...those times are gone, so they don't make the list.
I've bugged Kraig before for his list, the first time years ago he had Jennifer Conolly (sp), Halle Barry, Janet Jackson, and some playboy models. I asked him again this year and he had like Eva Longoria, Jessica Alba, and some other random chicks. In fact, i'm gonna email him now and give me his top 5 and i'll seriously put it on a laminated card for him.
Okay, nuff babbling for now. I've had alot on my mind. Suck it.
Song of the day: Stickwitu by PussyCat Dolls
Nobody gonna love me better, I must stick wit u forever
Nobody gonna take me higher, I must stick wit u
You know how to appreciate me, I must stick wit u, my baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way, I must stick wit u
Tazo count for Wednesday: 4
I'm not drinking enough this week...usually i'm average around 6.
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
To make sure your blog is manly, use the following procedure:
So apparently I'm not the only chick that has some defined "rules" when it comes to guys. I realize I'm married, but I certainly do judge guys, my friends' boyfriends/dates/manfriends/etc, because I certainly have at least the same if not higher standards for my girlfriends.
General rules:
Real Men Eat Meat. Fish doesn't count as meat. And I'm anti-pork. But real men are NOT vegetarians, and they appreciate a good hunk of meat cooked up on the grill. Goes back to caveman stuff. I want my men chopping wood and slapping a dead cow on their fire. You can't have passion if you only eat Tofurkey at thanksgiving.
No pink. EVER. Well okay at Hallowe'en, maybe. Pink is a BIG no no. I don't care if you shirt has a teenie bit of pink in it...it better have skulls on it then. Pink is for baby girls, for delicate things....heck it's the color for Breast Cancer Awareness for God's sakes....now unless you have breasts, you shouldn't wear it.
FLowered shirts This doesn't apply to Hawaiian print shirts....Magnum PI was hot for an 80s dude with a mustache. And yes we all know a certain Chino boy who likes his flowery shirts. But I'm sorry. Really, I am. But...choosing to wear FLOWERS on your torso...that's...so....bizarre....that's like voluntarily choosing to wear ribbons on your shirt. Why would you do that? It makes no sense.
P*ssy cars. Excuse my language...I really don't swear. But certain cars are unacceptable for guys to drive, such as: the Jetta, Tercel, HOnda Del Sol, Mazda Miata...you get the drift. Chick cars. VW Bugs are big time unacceptable. Well, all of these are okay for gay guys. FLAMING gay guys. Now let it be known, i do NOT require guys drive expensive cars. I couldn't care a less if all you can afford is a 1980 honda civic with each door a different color. I'll take a $500 beater car over a $30,000 chick car any day. So this doesn't make me shallow or materialistic. It just means that REAL MEN feel strongly about their choice of vehicle...just like they do meat.
And on that note, I'm okay if the rule should be applied to chicks too. I realize some chicks drive uber tough trucks. If, as a guy, you want to discriminate against a chick because her car is too dyke-ish...go right ahead. A chick driving a manly truck knows full well that she's little miss tough thang and that can scare off guys. I'm an equal-opportunity-car-discriminatory-chick.
Drive standard...stick, manual, standard, whatever you want to call it. I don't care if your CAR is manual...I just require that the guy knows how to drive stick. I know, not every guy can....so this one I'll let slide if the guy is fantastic. But the first time you see that sucker cry (i don't care if his dog died or if he got one of his nuts cut off)...you just remember, that pansy cries AND he can't drive stick...might as well cut off the other nut too.
Pay on the first date Yeah yeah i know. All the men of the world unite and scream at me. But before you do, remember, i'm the chick who advocates everyone be Crazy Fun Girl when your guy starts to back off and CFG gives lots of head. So...yeah before you argue with me....
The way i figure it, it's just old fashioned romance. I know we work, we want women's lib (personally, i DON'T...i'm FINE not working and living on one income, trust me, and having dinner ready every night as a result)...i mean, somehow in the end I end up paying for both me and the guy for YEARS to come...so at the very least, i just want ONE NIGHT where I can pull out my wallet and the guy says "Don't be silly, put that thing away"...since I'm paying for your sorry ass for the next N dates, you might as well just humor me with just ONE night off.
Eat more than the chick. This is SIGNIFICANT. I do NOT order salads on dates...heck, on my first date with Kraig I ordered the biggest plate of pasta. And i did that with all my dates after I became newly single and dated in the US. I think Kraig was horrified. But the point is...as a man, you have to eat more than me. You do NOT order a f*cking salad. I don't care that your company took you for all you can eat buffet at lunch. I don't care if you're going to work out later. I don't give a crap. I'm a girl, i'm half your size, eat a f*cking meal. And if you already ate...well who the ((bleep)) eats before a dinner date? That happened to Kim once...I would have ordered 5 courses (since it's the first date and he's paying anyway) and made him watch me chow through it all.
And on that note, tom lykes will be the first to tell men...if you're just gonna get laid anyway, order a salad because no chick will eat more than a guy and then you don't ahve to pay for a big huge meal. So if a dude orders a salad...order the most expensive thingo n the menu then bail out early because *yawn* you have an early morning....
NO BRIEFS...okay I've fortunately never had to be exposed to a guy who wore briefs (just boxers, or boxer briefs)...but i figured i'd throw that in for good measure.
Okay that's my list for now. Feel free to hate me. And then drive off in your Del Sol while you snack on a rice cake.
Added to say: MOTHER EFFER....Ryan Reynolds and The Rock are gonna do a buddy movie together. Those are 2 guys from my 5 list. (well the ever changing 5..but they are always on it). They better get off their asses and start filming.
General rules:
Real Men Eat Meat. Fish doesn't count as meat. And I'm anti-pork. But real men are NOT vegetarians, and they appreciate a good hunk of meat cooked up on the grill. Goes back to caveman stuff. I want my men chopping wood and slapping a dead cow on their fire. You can't have passion if you only eat Tofurkey at thanksgiving.
No pink. EVER. Well okay at Hallowe'en, maybe. Pink is a BIG no no. I don't care if you shirt has a teenie bit of pink in it...it better have skulls on it then. Pink is for baby girls, for delicate things....heck it's the color for Breast Cancer Awareness for God's sakes....now unless you have breasts, you shouldn't wear it.
FLowered shirts This doesn't apply to Hawaiian print shirts....Magnum PI was hot for an 80s dude with a mustache. And yes we all know a certain Chino boy who likes his flowery shirts. But I'm sorry. Really, I am. But...choosing to wear FLOWERS on your torso...that's...so....bizarre....that's like voluntarily choosing to wear ribbons on your shirt. Why would you do that? It makes no sense.
P*ssy cars. Excuse my language...I really don't swear. But certain cars are unacceptable for guys to drive, such as: the Jetta, Tercel, HOnda Del Sol, Mazda Miata...you get the drift. Chick cars. VW Bugs are big time unacceptable. Well, all of these are okay for gay guys. FLAMING gay guys. Now let it be known, i do NOT require guys drive expensive cars. I couldn't care a less if all you can afford is a 1980 honda civic with each door a different color. I'll take a $500 beater car over a $30,000 chick car any day. So this doesn't make me shallow or materialistic. It just means that REAL MEN feel strongly about their choice of vehicle...just like they do meat.
And on that note, I'm okay if the rule should be applied to chicks too. I realize some chicks drive uber tough trucks. If, as a guy, you want to discriminate against a chick because her car is too dyke-ish...go right ahead. A chick driving a manly truck knows full well that she's little miss tough thang and that can scare off guys. I'm an equal-opportunity-car-discriminatory-chick.
Drive standard...stick, manual, standard, whatever you want to call it. I don't care if your CAR is manual...I just require that the guy knows how to drive stick. I know, not every guy can....so this one I'll let slide if the guy is fantastic. But the first time you see that sucker cry (i don't care if his dog died or if he got one of his nuts cut off)...you just remember, that pansy cries AND he can't drive stick...might as well cut off the other nut too.
Pay on the first date Yeah yeah i know. All the men of the world unite and scream at me. But before you do, remember, i'm the chick who advocates everyone be Crazy Fun Girl when your guy starts to back off and CFG gives lots of head. So...yeah before you argue with me....
The way i figure it, it's just old fashioned romance. I know we work, we want women's lib (personally, i DON'T...i'm FINE not working and living on one income, trust me, and having dinner ready every night as a result)...i mean, somehow in the end I end up paying for both me and the guy for YEARS to come...so at the very least, i just want ONE NIGHT where I can pull out my wallet and the guy says "Don't be silly, put that thing away"...since I'm paying for your sorry ass for the next N dates, you might as well just humor me with just ONE night off.
Eat more than the chick. This is SIGNIFICANT. I do NOT order salads on dates...heck, on my first date with Kraig I ordered the biggest plate of pasta. And i did that with all my dates after I became newly single and dated in the US. I think Kraig was horrified. But the point is...as a man, you have to eat more than me. You do NOT order a f*cking salad. I don't care that your company took you for all you can eat buffet at lunch. I don't care if you're going to work out later. I don't give a crap. I'm a girl, i'm half your size, eat a f*cking meal. And if you already ate...well who the ((bleep)) eats before a dinner date? That happened to Kim once...I would have ordered 5 courses (since it's the first date and he's paying anyway) and made him watch me chow through it all.
And on that note, tom lykes will be the first to tell men...if you're just gonna get laid anyway, order a salad because no chick will eat more than a guy and then you don't ahve to pay for a big huge meal. So if a dude orders a salad...order the most expensive thingo n the menu then bail out early because *yawn* you have an early morning....
NO BRIEFS...okay I've fortunately never had to be exposed to a guy who wore briefs (just boxers, or boxer briefs)...but i figured i'd throw that in for good measure.
Okay that's my list for now. Feel free to hate me. And then drive off in your Del Sol while you snack on a rice cake.
Added to say: MOTHER EFFER....Ryan Reynolds and The Rock are gonna do a buddy movie together. Those are 2 guys from my 5 list. (well the ever changing 5..but they are always on it). They better get off their asses and start filming.
The things every blog should know
From Maximonline.com (too lazy to type the html to link it), they have 100 Things Every Guy Should Know. I condensed the ones that I think are important:
The best and worst bets in Vegas In the long run, the best game to play is blackjack—play smart and the house edge is only half a percent, i.e., the casino averages just 50¢ profit on each $100 bet. Throw in card counting and you can sometimes gain a tiny advantage over the house, at least until they smash your thumbs with a ball-peen hammer. Worst bet: slot machines. I saw on Travel Channel that Roulette is the worst and Slots are better...but um yeah doesn't matter, 'cause I only win at Roulette anyway.
The best time of day to buy shoesLate afternoon, when your feet have swollen to their largest size. Every girl knows this, guys should too.
Why girth beats length Most of the vagina’s nerve endings are in its outermost third. As long as you’re not lost in your own pubic hair, you’re probably long enough. Like a guy can change that anyway. What's the point of that knowledge for men?
The just-to-be-sure testicle check
The American Institute for Cancer Research recommends you give your balls a once-over once a month. Right after you shower:
1. Stand in front of the mirror and check for swelling on the skin of the scrotum.
2. Roll each testicle between the thumb and index finger; this shouldn’t be painful. Don’t worry if they’re slightly different sizes, but take note if one’s a significantly larger than the other. Feel for lumps.
3. Check the epididymis, the tube behind each testicle. (This ferries sperm from the testis to the outside world.)
4. If you feel pain or find lumps anywhere, see a doctor. You may just have an infection, but it could be the Big C, and getting the news early is absolutely key to keeping trouble at bay. (FYI, women are often the first to detect testicular lumps in their partners.) A guy should be healthy!
How to win more coin tosses
Always call tails. On U.S. coins, the heads side, with its big, solid portrait, weighs infinitesimally more: In the course of 10,000 tosses, the lighter tails side will come up an extra 50 or so times.So much for those Bernoulli trials...
What that weird metallic taste in your mouth when you chew on aluminum foil is Electric current. The aluminum reacts with the water and fillings in your mouth to form a tiny battery. What if you don't have metal fillings in your mouth?
How to preserve meat in the wild Slice your kill into long, thin strips; knead tons of salt into it; then cover the meat (to keep the flies off) and let it sit for four hours. Spread it out under a hot sun for a few days to dry it, or smoke it over burning green twigs for 24 hours. When dry and shriveled, the meat will last a year and can be eaten right from the jerky bag. because I require my men to drive non-p*ssy cars, save me from a burning building, and eat MEAT.
To ward off diseases, wear gloves, not a face mask Handshakes transmit viruses seven times more effectively than sneezes do. I swear I should just DRINK hand sanitizer.
The fastest production car on earth The McLaren F1, a bargain at just $1 million, has a top speed something north of 235 mph. It’s also the best accelerator available: Its V-12 lets the F1 rocket to 100 mph in just 3.6 seconds. I want credit for knowing the diff between a production car and a stock car. ANyway this is just to add "oomph" to the soon-to-be written blog about guys and cars.
Five no-fail fashion rules
Match the socks to the trousers and you can’t go wrong.
If you weigh more than you’d like, stick with dark colors. Or hide behind objects even larger than you.
If you’re investing in one nice suit, you want tropical wool: It’s warm but breathable, so you can wear it all year round.
Never wear suspenders with a belt. That’s clown shit, man.
Don’t ever wear any colors named for foods. Red, yes; cranberry, no. Pink, yes; salmon, no.as per yesterday...i don't think pink should EVER be allowed. And "olive" is okay on guys.
How to find and operate the G-spot The legendary G-spot, long sought by Cortés, Henry Hudson, and Amerigo Vespucci, is a soft, cushiony area in the roof of the vagina. Insert finger, curl it back and up toward her navel, and gently stroke toward the vagina’s opening—there ya go. Some women love this and can even ejaculate a fluid from G-spot stimulation alone (well, that and a DiCaprio fantasy, though they often refuse to admit it). Others find that having this spot touched is irritating or tickles. Choose bride accordingly. Every guy should have this info plastered everywhere.
Numbers you should know
Sperm can live in a woman’s body for up to five days.
You have 100,000 or so hairs on your head; you lose between 25 and 125 a day, more if you work at a magazine.
Continental drift amounts to about two centimeters a year.
On the clearest night, under ideal conditions, you can see about 4,000 stars with the naked eye.
70 percent of all women can’t reach orgasm from intercourse alone—or won’t, anyway.
The electricity needed to power a light bulb costs about 1.3¢ an hour.
Your body contains about 23 feet of small intestine and five feet of large intestine, including the smelly part right at the end.
Ejaculate exits your wanger at 12 mph.
I'm sorry I had to post this one...I'm going to die laughing at the last one. Which makes me wonder:
1. HOw many subjects were used to get that average?
2. What's the fastest?
3. What's the slowest?
8 Things You Don’t Know
Nothing’s more fun than knowing the real scoop and using it to shoot down some misinformed bozo at the bar. In our noble effort to know something about everything, we guys have perpetuated some major misconceptions. Maxim’s here to set the record straight.
- An American, Abner Doubleday, invented baseball. This myth was purposely fabricated by the dangerously patriotic founder of the Spalding sporting goods company in the early 1900s. In reality, 250 years ago the British were playing a primitive version called both “rounders” and “base-ball”, and Jane Austen refers to baseball by name in 1798’s Northanger Abbey, 40 years before its supposed invention at Cooperstown.
- The Sphinx’s nose was shot off by Napoleon’s troops. Actually, it was busted off in the 1300s by an Islamic militant—they were trouble even then—who considered it a pagan idol and therefore blasphemous.
- A captain of a ship at sea can perform weddings. Seems logical enough, the couple being in international waters and all, but it ain’t true: In fact, U.S. Navy regulations, and those of the navies of many other countries, specifically prohibit ships’ commanders from joining people in marriage.
- Your hair and nails continue to grow after you die. Nope—but the fleshy parts of your body recede from your hair and nails, making them appear longer.
- Bumblebee flight violates the laws of aerodynamics. Nothing that flies violates the laws of aerodynamics—that’s why they’re laws.
- Humans use just 10 percent of their brains. Only true of Home Shopping Network customers. Because the brain’s highly specialized, we only use a tiny fraction of its cells at any one time—it’s closer to 5 percent—but we use virtually all of it over the course of a day.
- Cutting/shaving hair makes it grow faster. Not by the hair of your chinny-chin-chin: How fast hair grows back, like how quickly a man goes bald, is simply a matter of genetics.
- Einstein was a crappy student. You wish. He was gifted at Latin and Greek as a boy, and doing college-level physics at 11. Yes, he got expelled from high school, but only because he couldn’t master French—and as a pre-WWI German, he probably assumed France would be speaking German soon enough anyway.
Yeah that Einstein thing always bugged me. It's like when people say that Bill Gates dropped out of college. Um yeah are YOU dropping out to form your own software company? Exactly. So shut up and do your homework you weed smokin' slacker.
How to say “I love you” in 13 languages
Japanese “Ai shite imasu”
Hawaiian “Aloha wau la oe”
Irish “T‡im i ngr‡ leat”
Hebrew “Ani ohev otakh”
Swedish “Jag Šlskar dig”
German “Ich liebe dich”
Eskimo “Nagligivaget”
Chinese “Wo ai ni”
Spanish “Te amo”
French “Je t’aime”
Italian “Ti amo”
Greek “S’agapo”
American “Yobringoverthatsweetstuffbaby”
Italian and Spanish sound the best to me.....
The song of the day is Time of your life (good riddance) by Green Day
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why.
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time.
Time wake up.
The best and worst bets in Vegas In the long run, the best game to play is blackjack—play smart and the house edge is only half a percent, i.e., the casino averages just 50¢ profit on each $100 bet. Throw in card counting and you can sometimes gain a tiny advantage over the house, at least until they smash your thumbs with a ball-peen hammer. Worst bet: slot machines. I saw on Travel Channel that Roulette is the worst and Slots are better...but um yeah doesn't matter, 'cause I only win at Roulette anyway.
The best time of day to buy shoesLate afternoon, when your feet have swollen to their largest size. Every girl knows this, guys should too.
Why girth beats length Most of the vagina’s nerve endings are in its outermost third. As long as you’re not lost in your own pubic hair, you’re probably long enough. Like a guy can change that anyway. What's the point of that knowledge for men?
The just-to-be-sure testicle check
The American Institute for Cancer Research recommends you give your balls a once-over once a month. Right after you shower:
1. Stand in front of the mirror and check for swelling on the skin of the scrotum.
2. Roll each testicle between the thumb and index finger; this shouldn’t be painful. Don’t worry if they’re slightly different sizes, but take note if one’s a significantly larger than the other. Feel for lumps.
3. Check the epididymis, the tube behind each testicle. (This ferries sperm from the testis to the outside world.)
4. If you feel pain or find lumps anywhere, see a doctor. You may just have an infection, but it could be the Big C, and getting the news early is absolutely key to keeping trouble at bay. (FYI, women are often the first to detect testicular lumps in their partners.) A guy should be healthy!
How to win more coin tosses
Always call tails. On U.S. coins, the heads side, with its big, solid portrait, weighs infinitesimally more: In the course of 10,000 tosses, the lighter tails side will come up an extra 50 or so times.So much for those Bernoulli trials...
What that weird metallic taste in your mouth when you chew on aluminum foil is Electric current. The aluminum reacts with the water and fillings in your mouth to form a tiny battery. What if you don't have metal fillings in your mouth?
How to preserve meat in the wild Slice your kill into long, thin strips; knead tons of salt into it; then cover the meat (to keep the flies off) and let it sit for four hours. Spread it out under a hot sun for a few days to dry it, or smoke it over burning green twigs for 24 hours. When dry and shriveled, the meat will last a year and can be eaten right from the jerky bag. because I require my men to drive non-p*ssy cars, save me from a burning building, and eat MEAT.
To ward off diseases, wear gloves, not a face mask Handshakes transmit viruses seven times more effectively than sneezes do. I swear I should just DRINK hand sanitizer.
The fastest production car on earth The McLaren F1, a bargain at just $1 million, has a top speed something north of 235 mph. It’s also the best accelerator available: Its V-12 lets the F1 rocket to 100 mph in just 3.6 seconds. I want credit for knowing the diff between a production car and a stock car. ANyway this is just to add "oomph" to the soon-to-be written blog about guys and cars.
Five no-fail fashion rules
Match the socks to the trousers and you can’t go wrong.
If you weigh more than you’d like, stick with dark colors. Or hide behind objects even larger than you.
If you’re investing in one nice suit, you want tropical wool: It’s warm but breathable, so you can wear it all year round.
Never wear suspenders with a belt. That’s clown shit, man.
Don’t ever wear any colors named for foods. Red, yes; cranberry, no. Pink, yes; salmon, no.as per yesterday...i don't think pink should EVER be allowed. And "olive" is okay on guys.
How to find and operate the G-spot The legendary G-spot, long sought by Cortés, Henry Hudson, and Amerigo Vespucci, is a soft, cushiony area in the roof of the vagina. Insert finger, curl it back and up toward her navel, and gently stroke toward the vagina’s opening—there ya go. Some women love this and can even ejaculate a fluid from G-spot stimulation alone (well, that and a DiCaprio fantasy, though they often refuse to admit it). Others find that having this spot touched is irritating or tickles. Choose bride accordingly. Every guy should have this info plastered everywhere.
Numbers you should know
Sperm can live in a woman’s body for up to five days.
You have 100,000 or so hairs on your head; you lose between 25 and 125 a day, more if you work at a magazine.
Continental drift amounts to about two centimeters a year.
On the clearest night, under ideal conditions, you can see about 4,000 stars with the naked eye.
70 percent of all women can’t reach orgasm from intercourse alone—or won’t, anyway.
The electricity needed to power a light bulb costs about 1.3¢ an hour.
Your body contains about 23 feet of small intestine and five feet of large intestine, including the smelly part right at the end.
Ejaculate exits your wanger at 12 mph.
I'm sorry I had to post this one...I'm going to die laughing at the last one. Which makes me wonder:
1. HOw many subjects were used to get that average?
2. What's the fastest?
3. What's the slowest?
8 Things You Don’t Know
Nothing’s more fun than knowing the real scoop and using it to shoot down some misinformed bozo at the bar. In our noble effort to know something about everything, we guys have perpetuated some major misconceptions. Maxim’s here to set the record straight.
- An American, Abner Doubleday, invented baseball. This myth was purposely fabricated by the dangerously patriotic founder of the Spalding sporting goods company in the early 1900s. In reality, 250 years ago the British were playing a primitive version called both “rounders” and “base-ball”, and Jane Austen refers to baseball by name in 1798’s Northanger Abbey, 40 years before its supposed invention at Cooperstown.
- The Sphinx’s nose was shot off by Napoleon’s troops. Actually, it was busted off in the 1300s by an Islamic militant—they were trouble even then—who considered it a pagan idol and therefore blasphemous.
- A captain of a ship at sea can perform weddings. Seems logical enough, the couple being in international waters and all, but it ain’t true: In fact, U.S. Navy regulations, and those of the navies of many other countries, specifically prohibit ships’ commanders from joining people in marriage.
- Your hair and nails continue to grow after you die. Nope—but the fleshy parts of your body recede from your hair and nails, making them appear longer.
- Bumblebee flight violates the laws of aerodynamics. Nothing that flies violates the laws of aerodynamics—that’s why they’re laws.
- Humans use just 10 percent of their brains. Only true of Home Shopping Network customers. Because the brain’s highly specialized, we only use a tiny fraction of its cells at any one time—it’s closer to 5 percent—but we use virtually all of it over the course of a day.
- Cutting/shaving hair makes it grow faster. Not by the hair of your chinny-chin-chin: How fast hair grows back, like how quickly a man goes bald, is simply a matter of genetics.
- Einstein was a crappy student. You wish. He was gifted at Latin and Greek as a boy, and doing college-level physics at 11. Yes, he got expelled from high school, but only because he couldn’t master French—and as a pre-WWI German, he probably assumed France would be speaking German soon enough anyway.
Yeah that Einstein thing always bugged me. It's like when people say that Bill Gates dropped out of college. Um yeah are YOU dropping out to form your own software company? Exactly. So shut up and do your homework you weed smokin' slacker.
How to say “I love you” in 13 languages
Japanese “Ai shite imasu”
Hawaiian “Aloha wau la oe”
Irish “T‡im i ngr‡ leat”
Hebrew “Ani ohev otakh”
Swedish “Jag Šlskar dig”
German “Ich liebe dich”
Eskimo “Nagligivaget”
Chinese “Wo ai ni”
Spanish “Te amo”
French “Je t’aime”
Italian “Ti amo”
Greek “S’agapo”
American “Yobringoverthatsweetstuffbaby”
Italian and Spanish sound the best to me.....
The song of the day is Time of your life (good riddance) by Green Day
Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why.
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time.
Time wake up.
IM with my mom
I should post more of these, but really I don't even pay attention when I'm actually having the conversation....
My_Mom: hi whats up
Me: nothing
My_Mom: how are the pussycatos?
My_Mom: i think marmalade gets so anxious because she wants to go outside
My_Mom: she was after all an outdoor cat all her life
Me: maybe
My_Mom: a video came out with cats meowing xmas songs, they showed it on tv this morning, smoking watched
My_Mom: it was so cute
My_Mom: smokey I ment
My_Mom: wish i could hug her right now
My_Mom: how is stash pooh?
Me: he's good
My_Mom: still naughty?
My_Mom: not naughty, just playful and he wants to play with marmalade really
Me: yes
My_Mom: they advertised in the flyer a climbing post, with a basket on top and a hous on the side, some ball hanging from the other side for them to play
My_Mom: that would be fun for the cats, costs 176 $
Me: yup
My_Mom: should buy them one
My_Mom: bet marmalade would love to sleep in that house
My_Mom: the whole post is covered with carpet
Me: i did that remember...marmalade peed on it.
My_Mom: oops forgot
My_Mom: she is really something
My_Mom: what u need is wood floor only, no carpet at all
Me: yup
My_Mom: ((my brother))said its ok... u get the jewellery and the stamps, he gets the coins
My_Mom: works for him, so no fighting over it should i die all over sudden
Me: okay
My_Mom: also the pendants are framed coins hehe
My_Mom: typical austrian thing
My_Mom: also keep the wind up watches, they might be worth something one day
My_Mom: cant get them anymore
My_Mom: have to finish washing the floor, c u
Me: ok
My_Mom: hi whats up
Me: nothing
My_Mom: how are the pussycatos?
My_Mom: i think marmalade gets so anxious because she wants to go outside
My_Mom: she was after all an outdoor cat all her life
Me: maybe
My_Mom: a video came out with cats meowing xmas songs, they showed it on tv this morning, smoking watched
My_Mom: it was so cute
My_Mom: smokey I ment
My_Mom: wish i could hug her right now
My_Mom: how is stash pooh?
Me: he's good
My_Mom: still naughty?
My_Mom: not naughty, just playful and he wants to play with marmalade really
Me: yes
My_Mom: they advertised in the flyer a climbing post, with a basket on top and a hous on the side, some ball hanging from the other side for them to play
My_Mom: that would be fun for the cats, costs 176 $
Me: yup
My_Mom: should buy them one
My_Mom: bet marmalade would love to sleep in that house
My_Mom: the whole post is covered with carpet
Me: i did that remember...marmalade peed on it.
My_Mom: oops forgot
My_Mom: she is really something
My_Mom: what u need is wood floor only, no carpet at all
Me: yup
My_Mom: ((my brother))said its ok... u get the jewellery and the stamps, he gets the coins
My_Mom: works for him, so no fighting over it should i die all over sudden
Me: okay
My_Mom: also the pendants are framed coins hehe
My_Mom: typical austrian thing
My_Mom: also keep the wind up watches, they might be worth something one day
My_Mom: cant get them anymore
My_Mom: have to finish washing the floor, c u
Me: ok
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Edumacate your blog
Some interesting news bits to read today:
Is monogamy dead?: A 'mistake' that doesn't count?
Schwartz has likened this attitude to overeating. We say we shouldn’t, but we do it anyway. And when we do, we still claim to be monogamous, chalking up our fling (flings?) as “a mistake” that doesn’t count. We take a mulligan.You know who you are.
TrimSpa sued over Anna Nicole Smith....okay clearly the problem is that you should never, EVER have Anna Nicole at a CHARITY event...that's like inviting Michael Jackson to a nursery school and then getting upset when he plays doctor. Come on now people!
Kazaa owners work to install filters...sigh I miss my napster days! It was so therapeutic to just stare at those download bars. My email address back then was "NapsterAddict@rogers.com"....knowing what i know now, I should have bought a MASSIVE hard drive no matter the cost and downloaded everything and anything.
Microsoft sued over XBox...only 'cause we talked about the glitches so much.
Howard Stern is getting Sirius on the airwaves... I really need to get off my ass and get my Sirius finally. All week he's been doing his farewell stuff, and it's SO sad. He's one of the few GOOD things i've experienced about moving to the US (we don't have him on the airwaves in Canada), other than Circus Animal Cookies and Macaroni Grill.
The song of the day is Can I Have It Like That by Pharrell featuring Gwen
So, drop ya purse, and grab ya hips,
And act like ya tryin' to get this money right quick,
So can i have it like that?
You got it like that
Can i have it like that?
You got it like that
Will post my Tazo count in a few hours....
Is monogamy dead?: A 'mistake' that doesn't count?
Schwartz has likened this attitude to overeating. We say we shouldn’t, but we do it anyway. And when we do, we still claim to be monogamous, chalking up our fling (flings?) as “a mistake” that doesn’t count. We take a mulligan.You know who you are.
TrimSpa sued over Anna Nicole Smith....okay clearly the problem is that you should never, EVER have Anna Nicole at a CHARITY event...that's like inviting Michael Jackson to a nursery school and then getting upset when he plays doctor. Come on now people!
Kazaa owners work to install filters...sigh I miss my napster days! It was so therapeutic to just stare at those download bars. My email address back then was "NapsterAddict@rogers.com"....knowing what i know now, I should have bought a MASSIVE hard drive no matter the cost and downloaded everything and anything.
Microsoft sued over XBox...only 'cause we talked about the glitches so much.
Howard Stern is getting Sirius on the airwaves... I really need to get off my ass and get my Sirius finally. All week he's been doing his farewell stuff, and it's SO sad. He's one of the few GOOD things i've experienced about moving to the US (we don't have him on the airwaves in Canada), other than Circus Animal Cookies and Macaroni Grill.
The song of the day is Can I Have It Like That by Pharrell featuring Gwen
So, drop ya purse, and grab ya hips,
And act like ya tryin' to get this money right quick,
So can i have it like that?
You got it like that
Can i have it like that?
You got it like that
Will post my Tazo count in a few hours....
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