Birthday Pics

Pics from last night, Nicole D's 2nd annual 30th birthday shindig...
Shutterfly Link Here

I feel the need to point out that at the START of the night, my hair looked awesome, totally straight with a hint of wave. This rarely ever works, so damn right i'm going to make a big deal when my hair looks decent (unlike my Comic Con pics, where the humidity made my hair go nuts!)

Comic Con pics

OKAY...finally...
Here's the pics from Comic Con 2008

I'm DONE. You hear me? I'm DONE. I'm so over going. My goal this year was to photograph just random nerdness. Kraig went almost every day, I just went on Saturday (Sunday gave my tix to Tim and Mark, after we filmed Mark's band's music video snippets).

A few things to note...

Felicia and I are noting the bromance brewing between Kraig and John


Summer Glau is every nerd's wet dream. She's not hot enough to be a regular actress, but put her in 4400, Terminator, Firefly, Serenity...and nerds everywhere are ready to shoot their loads.


This kid was the freakiest person I've ever met. I think he was there alone, which is a warning sign #1. When Kraig took his picture, he freaked out asking whether he got his STINGER in the picture. And then he ranted about how cool his stinger was (warning #2)! He was almost getting aggressive, like kid, chill the eff out!


This guy was from Stargate or Battlestar Galactica (i think i mislabeled the images in Shutterfly)...I don't know who he is, but he was GORGEOUS. I mean, honestly, I don't know why every nerd woman there didn't rape him. I felt like when I walked by it suddenly got all slow-mo and "I just died in your arms tonight" played in the air...he was supa dupa fly.


Nathan Fillion is such a douchebag. His shows all tank (minus Desperate Housewives), he can't act his way out of a paperbag, and he's not even remotely attractive. I don't see how this tool has a job.


I used to work with this guy. What's scary is that everyone was in awe of him when he was wandering around, and my reaction was "OMG...i worked with that guy!"...What are the odds?



So that's it, I'm DONE with Comic Con, i'm done with posting pictures, I'm over it!

Note that it was so humid in San Diego, I was rockin' some crazy wavy curly hair...grrrrrrrrrrr....nothing says sexy like crazy frizzy wavy hair, a Disney tshirt, and running shoes. Yeah!

Another year older. Definitely not wiser.

Some pics from one of my birthday shindigs this past week...got to see most of my girls, whom I adore, they're fabulous and as always make getting older a little less painful! Just a few pics View quickly before someone complains about their face plastered on the web :P

My eyes are hurting

Okay i'm pretty pissed because I wrote up this blog entry already, but then the computer froze up and I lost my stuff. Grrr.

Here's my rant for today, or really, the past while...

I have incredibly high standards I think for people I see on tv. Everyone's dying to be on tv, so the very least TV producers can do is pick from the most aesthetically-pleasing of the bunch. I had to stop watching Living Lohan because neither Lindsay Lohan's mom or sister's personalities (oh you new jersey people you!) make up for their ugliness. Lindsay is attractive. Ali? Not so much.

I'm obsessed with this eHarmony commercial: link to youtube because eharmony made them disable the embedded link. I just don't think Lee is good-looking enough to be in a commercial. Now if it were a commercial for weight loss, then yes, he's attractive enough. However this is for something that's based on love and chemistry, which requires some level of aesthetic qualities. Which he lacks.

Then I wonder, would I find him hot in real life? Would I want to date him? But that's not what matters...even in an online dating commercial. No, his face is on MY tv, during MY airtime, during MY free time...I say what should be on, and what I want is an e-harmony commercial featuring Ryan Reynolds. Note that Ann Marie is super cute, so I won't knock her. In fact, she must be incredibly psycho to still have been single 'cause she can do better than that Lee guy. He would have been better looking if he had stayed OFF the tv, without my judging eyes viewing him through a glass panel.

Consider that in the 70s and 80s, producers didn't seem to understand how attractiveness matters. Sure, they had Charlie's Angels...but what about the original American Gladiators? Did they not think that chicks could be tough, strong, AND hot? Compare the original cast vs the cast now...don't tell me they didn't have buff hot chicks in the 80s!


Like really? that's the hottest you could find?! Forget the hair, getting past the trendiness of their appearance, these chicks were fug!

Now that being said, I have the reverse attitude about newscasters. I don't want people that happen to be pretty who learned world news. I want people who were passionate about journalism, didn't have time to date around in highschool and didn't care about their looks to tell me the news. Heck, i don't even trust pretty weather girls. News seems more credible when the person reading the teleprompter is unattractive.

Does this rule apply to sportscasters? That's a tough call. Probably because I don't watch sports. I would watch hockey, but living in SoCal, I'm stuck watching the f*cking Ducks and they can suck it for all I care. GO SENS!! It came to my attention a few weeks ago that Dana Jacobsen from ESPN has super big arms.

Which you'd think, what's the big deal? Well apparently to men watching her on ESPN, this is a big deal. Like really big. I don't think guys have the same feeling as I have for the level of credibility of my news/information versus the attractiveness of the person delivering the info. It seems that she is so crazy big, they are incapable of focusing on whatever sports-related information she has to deliver. But would a thin, big-boobed chick be any less distracting than her alleged upper arm area?

So to see if maybe the guys I received this information were just a little harsh, I did some web searches. And this is what came up on the web (all typos are theirs, not mine)...

The Good:
- On top of all that she is an incredibly gorgeous and sexy woman
- Besides all that,she's beautiful......I think i'm in love
- Dana Jacobson is gorgeous woman. She has an amazing body that she hides well.Beneath all that clothing i know there is a very hott body! Besides that shes into sports as well.
- Even though Dana might be a tad bit on the thick side, I think it kind of makes the attraction to her a little stronger. She's absolutely gorgeous and has an amazing body with great curves. I know I'm not the only one that would rather see her wearing something other than suits most of the time.

The Bad:
- i love her big hands and i'm sure that she has beautiful big feet as well.
- I tolerated her because she had the "big sister" thing going and because I thought she was brave to go on TV looking like she does (bad hair, wardrobe and figure).
- It must be her knowledge of sports cause shes no Kim Kardashian. Shes bigger than most of the male co-host.
- I find it hard to believe so many people would give her a review for being pretty? I mean come on, seriously. She must have family and friends on here giving her those because she is one big hefer.
- If you're going to hire somebody who doesn't have a clue, at least make sure she is attractive
- Dana is a joke...She will be fired soon enough. And she isn't sexy.....Scarlett Johanson is sexy......Dana Jacobson...not so much

The Ugly:
- Some reviews called her Sexy? Sexy? By the looks of that bod, she needs to put down the chocalate bar and actually participate in a sport rather than masquerading as someone credible.
- She needs to be FIRED!! Not to mention she is HUGE!!
- She is fat and unattractive, only knows michigan football.
- moooooooooooooooo....what a cow

I feel like I gotta defend this poor girl...I mean, seriously, she's not THAT bad on the eyes. And I'm very, very protective of not only my eyes, but the images that come through my tv screen. It needs to be decided...do Sportscasters need to be attractive like entertainment show hosts (Maria Menounos level), or do we want them to be unattractive in order to gain credibility?

Weekend randomness and Oprah's Sensual Years

Scenes from a mall...

Seen on Sunday: Sean Hayes (Jack from Will & Grace and Victor Garber (the dude from Titanic who was also in Legally Blond). Sort of an odd couple:



Shopping together at American Eagle. Or J Crew. Crap I don't remember which one. I know for sure I wasn't in Abercrombie. I think they were debating on a top for Sean Hayes to buy. Or they were having a passionate discussion while leaning over folded polo shirts. Either way, I've never seen any dude(s) so passionate while trying on a shirt. Maybe they were discussing politics. Or they were discussing whether Sean should get the yellow one. It was just bizarre. Plus Victor Garber is surprisingly much smaller than I would have thought, i think neither of them could have had more than 20lbs on me.

Other random thoughts:

- I'm very pro-plastic surgery (if you can afford it), but the thought of a dude getting triceps implants freaks me out. Gives me the same skin crawling feeling that i get when I think of spiders.
a girl can never make too many wardrobe changes. Men however should just stick with one thing a day. Especially if i'm the one who's doing the laundry.

- I am a horrible driver when i'm nervous. Some people can focus. I however, can not. You know who makes me nervous? The Garmin GPS lady. She reminds me of a mean schoolteacher. Repeating over and over that in “point two miles, exit ramp”. Yes ma'am!

- it's amazing how one weekend of not sleeping in your own bed can make your body feel like someone took a baseball bat to it....I woke up today seriously feeling like I'd been mauled all weekend. Maybe I need to pull a Carrie and bring my pillow around with me, that Guess pillow was $16, I bought it at Sears when i was in college, and it's the best pillow EVER.

- what is the appropriate ratio for a chick's arms? In particular, a sportscaster on ESPN? More importantly, if the camera adds X pounds, can it add it onto just one area?

Yesterday I caught a bit of Oprah, and it was all about sex. Or specifically, Sex In Your Sensual Years. Which I think is just Oprah's way of saying, sex when you're old. They yammered onto about how sex when you're older is better than sex in your 20s.

This would have be a hard sell for me, because when I was 20 I was fully AWARE that not only was I twenty, I also fully remember thinking that my metabolism was going to start going downhill so enjoy poutine and calzones as much as possible. Now i should hope that I'm not in my “sensual years” (otherwise i'll be forced to stab myself), but i'm definitely more self conscious about my body than I was in my early 20s, even though I'm the same weight as I was back then. If I continue on this path, I'll be wearing mumus by the time i'm 40. (Oh geezus, are my 40s my “sensual years”? Note to self: shoot self upon 40th birthday. Alternatively, bitch-slap self on 40th birthday). Gone are the years of the uber short skirts and tummy-bearing tops. Oh granted tummy-bearing tops haven't been in style for ages (Are you listening Mariah Carey?!), but you get the point, I would never even CONSIDER wearing that now even if it was in style.

Did everyone get the “oh you'll have better self esteem and self image as you get older” gene except me? Before my goal was to just get a tummy tuck after having kids...now my laundry list of things that I want done in the next 15 years will require taking out a 3rd mortgage. Hmmm, I guess I justify it that the available procedures back when I had my original 1-item wish list was much smaller than all the crazy things you can do now. Watch out Cat-Lady, i'll be giving you a run for your money. Meow.


Ewwwww, I suddenly thought of Oprah thinking about her “sensual years” and getting it on with Stedman. AND Gayle. At the same time. With lots of lube.

Oh the humanity.

Update to the bus guy

Props to Tim for finding this:
Greyhound Guy's Facebook Page

He looks like a total skid...people like that always get their heads lopped off on buses! He had it coming!

And why can't I stop laughing at this whole story?! Makes me miss Canada even more.

That's some f*cked up ishh right there

Wow. Wow wow. And this happened in the same city/province where i was born.
Sleeping man beheaded on Greyhound bus

WINNIPEG, Manitoba - A passenger sleeping on a Greyhound bus was killed and decapitated by his seatmate on Wednesday night as the vehicle rolled across the Canadian prairies, witnesses said.

What's more effed up: that some dude lost his head on a bus, or that I laughed my ass off reading this?

Can't wait movie omg omg

Seth Green. Amish. What more do you need in life. Very rarely does a preview make me giggle as much as this one did:

Absolutely stunning

My life is incomplete without this skirt in my closet:


It's a promo pic for Macy's anniversary. If i get hit by a bus tomorrow, please sell my entire closet, shoes, purses, accessories, car and buy that skirt to bury me in it.

Comic Con recap coming soon

Until then, this cracked me up (found on the Oh No They Didn't celeb gossip site):

Simpsons Rock

After a billion years, The Simpsons still got it...
I can't stop laughing:

So, so stoked!

For 10 years, I've been wanting this hat from a guy I went to University with. I knew it was from surf shop, and I always thought he got it from San Diego.

Every time I go to Comic Con or wherever, I always try to go into surf shops to see if I can find the hat. I didn't know the name or anything, I just knew I'd recognize the logo when I saw it.

Seriously, it was an awesome effing hat.

Anyway, I finally thought to just ASK Eric where he got it from, and he's like "the Ron Jon hat?"...YES YES! And best of all, there's a Ron Jon Surf Shop right in Orange! Swwwwwwwwwwwweeeeet!

This is the hat I want (in cream, not navy):


Hmm maybe I'll just get Kraig to get it for me for my birthday and be done with it.

Let me backtrack a bit here...baseball hats are REALLY hard for me to find. The best one I have is my highschool one, which I adore but you know, it's been years since highschool and I rarely wear it because I don't want to wear it out. It's got a snap button strap on the back, which is perfect: I can put a ponytail through it, but it's already perfectly adjusted for my head.

I can't find anything like it anymore. Either you get hats that are fully covered in the back (not ideal for chicks with ponytails), or they velcro straps or something retarded like that...i don't want to keep adjusting. And they never fit right. Or they're those plastic snap doodads, which also are kinda weird.

The Ron Jon one i think is the plastic snap doodad kind, but considering how effing awesome that had is...I'll make an exception. Maybe I should just order it online, considering the $7 shipping is probably the same cost of gas for me anyway.

Today is a good day.

No, i am NOT a nerd

Unlike some people (who aren't nameless, just ask me and i'll tell you her name), I don't "brag" about being a nerd. I have the right to be called a nerd (did you program your Vic20 when you were 6 years old? Do you know the 3 Laws of Robotics? Did you spend your Saturday nights watching the old skool Dr. Who? Do you think the TI-85 is the best calculator ever? Exactly.), I just don't think that's a noble thing to call yourself. I'm almost 31, but I'd still like to avoid being beat up.

That being said...sigh...I'm willing to admit that on Saturday morning I will be up EARLY to get in line for this:
12:45-1:45 Exclusive Q&A with the writers of The Office— Meet the writers of the EmmyAward–winning comedy The Office and hear them talk about their favorite episodes, characters, and fun behind-the-scenes stories. Moderated by cast member Rainn Wilson (Dwight Schrute), panelists include executive producer/showrunner Greg Daniels (The Simpsons) and writers Jennifer Celotta (Andy Richter Controls the Universe), Michael Schur (Saturday Night Live), B.J. Novak, Lester Lewis (The Larry Sanders Show), Gene Stupnitsky (Year One), Lee Eisenberg (Year One), Mindy Kaling (Matt and Ben), Justin Spitzer (Scrubs), Ryan Koh (various commercials), and Anthony Ferrell (The Audacity)

That's not overly nerdy...it's just at the ultimate uber nerd-fest ever. Don't blame me for the location.

Rumor has it that it's actually very easy, with Professional badges, to just go in through the back. Kraig doesn't think so, but maybe this is the year I actually hootch myself up and give it a whirl. Who am I kidding...you either gotta be a Playboy bunny (which there are plenty of at comic con) OR a relatively thin chick with a super expensive costume to pull off the hootch factor. Maybe I can get Kraig to just stand in line while I attempt to use my shmooze skillz to get in the back.

Rainn Wilson and BJ Novak are no Steve Carrell, but I'll lick their feet anyway. I LOVE THE OFFICE!!!

Letter to the editor

Re: that Gigi sex toy
Well the reason it is marketed to women is because it helps with the fact you can use it together if you want.

It takes care of the um BJ situation. If after you get married you don't want to do them as much....maybe
hehehhe.
You don't have to um swallow or have too much in your mouth....
ok now that I've said too much on Sabina's Blog.

I don't know what i laughed more at, this comment or the picture I posted from Creepshow 2 (seriously, seriously, that pic kicks ass).

All I can say regarding whether you enjoy giving BJs after marriage is...

Way back in highschool a friend who shall remain nameless told me that she just decided that she's no longer giving them. Oh wait, maybe that was hand jobs. It was some "job". Anyway, I remember her telling me and I was like, "wait, what? That's an option? We don't HAVE to do __ jobs? Why did no one tell me?! Was I taken off the memo?!".

Hmmm well somehow she stopped doing whatever that "job" was, but my attitude is well...how can I word this...finding a substitute isn't going to get me out of my job lol. Whether it's my employment or my bedroom!

TEE
EMMM
EYE

Movie review: Batman The Dark Knight (no spoilers)

Since this is a big ticket movie, I won't put any spoilers here.

Last night I went to the ghetto Kaleidoscope to see the latest Batman flick, which amazingly wasn't packed at all. I actually was first in line in that little lineup thing they make you stand in before entering the theater so I was stoked. Until I realized that there was only like 30 people in there, which deprived me of my power trip.

I was spoiled by Sex And The City, the previews were max 1 minute. They jumped straight to the movie. This damn movie had at least 9 minutes of previews, which really just irritated the crap out of me.

The movie was also incredibly long, and being of the MTV generation after awhile my enjoyment factor goes downhill. I can't stand anything for 3 hours. I have a jacked up knee and I was attempting to stretch my leg out without much luck. After 3 hours, I start to feel like the directors and moviemakers are just plain arrogant to think that their movie is so damn good they don't need to edit it down because I'm going to be so in love with their work, i WANT to suffer for another half hour.

Those editors have an easy job. They don't have to cut anything out.

Heath Ledger kicked ass, he really did a brilliant job. I had to remind myself this is the likable anti-hero of Ten Things I Hate About You. Kraig made a comment about what they should have done to his character at the end of the movie, but I pointed out that given that he's DEAD and all, they probably had to factor in what would be appropriate at the end (sad, but true).

I was trying to think of why they would cast Maggie Gyllenhaal to replace Katie Holmes. She's quirky but NOT attractive, and at one point The Joker calls her "beautiful". Umm no, no she's not. But then again, The Joker is crazy so maybe that's a diss. Then I remembered that Heath did Brokeback with Jake Gyllenhaal, and maybe that's how Maggie got her "in" to this movie. I suppose when you have to simulate gay sex with a dude, you either have to buy him dinner or cast his sister in your next movie.

(shrug) Without giving away any plotlines, I'll say it's a pretty good movie. I preferred the first one, but this one is entertaining in its own right. I'd give the special effects/CG guys props, as well as the makeup artists (seriously, the last 1/3rd of the movie...you'll understand what i mean re: makeup artists). Hell, let's give the gaffer some mad love too for his efforts in making things seem...um like nighttime.

This was a very cryptic movie review. Suck it.

Friday, pics, and how to not be classy

I was going to make a post about a girl I know who has zero class, which thus would have prompted the list of How to be UnClassy.

Thanks to you mofos there on Friday night, I was able to live the tale myself.

Class is very, very important. You can't buy class. You can be super poor and be much more classy than someone with ten times your wealth.

How NOT to be classy, as seen by cough cough me cough on Friday night:

1. Don't eat anything all day except 1/2 a doughnut and a leftover salad before going drinking.
2. Accept every shot of patron offered your way.
3. Make your poor friend drive your drunk ass home.
4. Hug everyone around you. Even if you don't know them. Hugs for all!
5. Start telling people about dreams you had about them that you vowed to NEVER reveal.
6. Argue over who's got a bigger gut by showing your gut to them.
7. When your husband tries to take care of you, yell at him to stop touching you but thatyou want your jeans taken off. (I woke up at 4am, got up to get something to eat 'cause i was starving, and iw as like, "where the f*ck are my pants?!")
8. When your husband gives you a bowl "just in case", and then later tries to take it away, yell at him "It's my bucket! MY BUCKET!" and don't let him have it.

Ugh, my apologies if I offended anyone, I haven't gotten that much of a horrible drunk since Stacey's wedding 5 years ago. I'm much too old to pull drunken antics!

Pics here. At least I hand washed and waxed my SUV myself the next day while hungover to suffer for my sins! But damn i had a fun time!

Product Review: Kiwi Smiling Feet

I swear, the last picture in my last posting makes me laugh. It's great when you can crack yourself up.

Tim, to add to my point from t he last posting: i'm not saying we'll have complete human-free sexual experiences, I'm simply saying that it's amazing that we've gotten to the point where you can have a virtual sexual experience, it's not like in 1920 anyone thought that would be possible.

SERIOUSLY that blob picture has me rolling on the floor...heh heh, Google images kicks ass.

Product Review: Kiwi Smiling Feet anti-slip shoe insert doodads
Kiwi Product list

Being a mutant with small mutant feet (i barely fit into a size 5 shoe), I experience some serious crazy shoe issues over the course of a day. Typically my shoes are slightly too big, because it's next to impossible to find anything in my shoe size. Plus, even when I do, they're usually cheap shoes (think Payless) which are cute and all, but they're not exactly known for quality or comfort.

I have a gorgeous pair of Nina shoes (which, shout out to their company, they actually make size 5s that fit) which were the last pair, and I had to get a size 6. These effing shoes make my legs look AWESOME, which offsets the pain that I feel with my feet sloshing around in heels that are too big.

To avoid killing myself in a tripping accident, I went and bought some Anti-Slip inserts. The package said Smiling Feet, and although my feet don't have mouths, I think they deserve to experience some happiness finally.

I was so stoked to try these suckers. I peeled off the little sticky adhesive thing and placed them in my uber cute heels. And then...the Smiling Feet inserts fell right off. I was like, 'wtf!'. I peeled off the backing of the other insert, and discovered it has all the adhesion of a Post-It note. Instead of just writing off this $4 situation, I actually got mad. REAL MAD. Who was the engineer that decided the adhesion level to these things? Was it a guy? Because clearly usability had no been factored in.

So I went to their website and wrote their customer support form thing a little nasty message saying how disappointed I was that they didn't even consider the adhesion to the shoe because otherwise the little inserts were crazy comfortable.

Damn you Kiwi employees. Damn you all to hell.

Letter to the editor

Carrie (re: Running Man book): heck yeah I read the book, it was awesome! Very different from the movie however, but the best part is when book-version-Arnold is crawling on the floor, his guts spilling out, then his intestines loop around some dead guy's head so he has to crawl back to unhook it and shove it back inside him....In addition to my Piers Anthony/Isaac Asimov reading phases, i was all into Stephen King (Richard Bachman), but I remember seeing Creepshow 2 and IT and those scared the crap out of me so I stopped reading his books.

I don't think you're right at all about society moving towards the absence of sexual content.
Tim: You're putting words in my mouth. I don't think we're "moving" towards it, we already have. You can't possibly think we're where we were in the days of woodstock and houses where you could go specifically to bone someone else. Those things still go on, but nowhere NEAR the same levels what with the advent of AIDS and STDs...I'm not saying it'll be complete absence, at least not in our lifetimes (I mean, if in the next generation there's an STD you get just by LOOKING at gonads, then f*ck it...i'd have no problems wearing a chastity belt forever).

MARLENE YOU ROCK...yes the Gigi is what I was thinking of. Why are these things marketed towards chicks, I'll bet that Gigi thing feels way better than a frickin' blow up doll for a dude if he's a germaphobe of the future. Although what do I know, maybe these are marketed towards dudes too. Damn i can't find a pic online, there's alotta things called "gigi" on the net.

EDITED: Marcella you KICK ASS! Here's a pic:


Back to Creepshow 2...the only reason I was scared of that movie was the vignette (The Raft) of the black oil slick that would eat people on this little lake. For real, this concept scared the pulp out of me. In hindsight, not really so scary, but damn for years I just got freaked out that some big black oil slick blob was going to engulf me.

Sex, Robots, and Isaac Asimov

When i was still in elementary school I went through a massive nerd phase where I read books like crazy. Not that that's something new, but my parents actually threw out our TV (which I didn't tell anyone at the time, who's parents actually physically THROW OUT a tv? The only family tv? And then go years without one? My formative Saved by the Bell years were spent reading books instead of watching tv. Gee, wonder why I'm so addicted to television now? But i digress). So i went pretty fast from reading Babysitter's Club/Sweet Valley High to Piers Anthony and Isaac Asimov, I probably read more books during that non-tv time than I ever will for the rest of my life (and I'm in a book club even!).

Thanks mom and dad, for making me the socially retarded woman I am today.

I remember reading Robots of Dawn (in addition to many other books by Isaac Asimov, who's a mutha effin' sci fi badass...ummm as badass as you can be given the subject) and although i didn't get very much of the sexual references at the time, I do remember a key element in the book is that on whatever planet (Aurora?), humans don't actually interface with each other. They're total germophobes. You can see each other through holographic-type phone systems so it seems like you're there when you're not. And some chicks just bone their robots (Daneel i believe was one of them), since they're man-like anyway (nice! I approve). Funny that Isaac Asimov didn't think to reference Purell hand sanitizer anywhere in his books, i'm sure he thought of it before the stuff was actually invented.



I also recall the hero of the book actually getting to physically bone one of the chicks in the book, and the whole sex scene was written out like he was taking her on some sort of trip. Flying or something. I don't know, I didn't get it then, and I'm certainly not creative enough to figure it out now. If someone can make sex seem like I'm sitting on a beach in Hawaii drinking out of a coconut (without my husband losing his wedding ring in the ocean in Waikiki lol), let me know.

What I do remember is thinking how odd that any sexual contact was electronic, through holographic images or with robots. And now...that's what society is turning towards. Maybe because I still have that Vh1 “Sex the Revolution” series in my brain, but we are a society that has to fear herpes, AIDs, baby mama drama...and we also have immediate access to all things sex thanks to the web and Passion Parties (Marlene, wtf is the name of that jelly-ish thing with a hole in it that you guys got me for my bridal shower? For the life of me, i can't remember what it's called but it seems like now would be time for a good shout out to that doodad!).

Very much like in Isaac Asimov's worlds, you can have aseptic sex virtually with anyone in the world as long as you have a method of communication, some sort of camera device, and your own little robot (that runs on two AA batteries lol).

Much like how Stephen King was ahead of this time with The Running Man (link to that blog entry here, effing best movie ever! Second to Clueless), Isaac Asimov was also well ahead of his time and totally foresaw the future of sex.

Yay to nerds.

Vasectomies, scissors, and snip snip

An interesting question was raised to me today: when you get a vasectomy, what exactly happens with the sperm? I mean, we know no sperm comes OUT, but where does it go?

So I immediately scoped out HowStuffWorks.com to get the inside info...

I guess since you're snipping the vas deferens, the little doodads that connect your nuts to your tool, you're now removing the "roads" that get the sperm to where they need to go.

But what happens to the sperm? I mean, the body still produces it, right? Aren't you just asking for permanent blue balls?

One effect of a vasectomy is that the body can actually cease to recognize its own sperm and can develop antibodies to it.

That's seriously effed up. Why are guys so messed up? Even their surgeries are gross.

And speaking of the male member, if a guy gets his man meat tattooed, does he have to do it when it's erect? Wouldn't the pain alone make it shrink back up? And if you did it when it's NOT erect, wouldn't there be gaps whenever it IS erect?




Edited to add:
Spitz wrote this on my Facebook page re: this post, it's too funny to not post here:

Far as the tattooing goes, I bet they stretch the skin of a flaccid wiener while they work. I'd guess maintaining a boner for 3 hours can challengiing -- especially with the needles buzzing away and the pain exploding in your brain and balls like a pinball machine.

And far as the antisperm antibodies go, the real issue isn't so much building immunological resistance to your own little guys, or even shooting blanks, but the actual procedure itself: The anesthesia is local, so you can actually HEAR when they snip the tubes, and SMELL when they cauterize them shut.

(Wincing? Well YOU brought this up...)