Friday, June 01, 2007
You are a running queen, young and sweet, only seventeen....
Good luck to Carrie who's got her crazy ass long marathon this weekend.
Go Sens...no really...c'mon Sens! GO DAMMIT!
I've spent the past 7 years getting ripped on for being Canadian, and every week I hear some retarded comment coming from someone like it was the first time I've heard their moronic wisecrack.
Dear Americans: I've heard EVERYTHING already. All it does is annoy me NOT because of the comment, but because it's boring me to tears hearing all the wisecracks.
In other news, mutha effing Senators, i NEED you to win. You don't understand. The last barrage of wisecracks come from coworkers and rather than go on about how they can shove the Ducks up their ass, I'd rather bring my Sens towel to work with pride and say "yeah...you may own alotta things...but Canadians live eat breathe hockey!"....
From "best of" craigslist (I'd give credit to the poster, but there was obviously no name or email addy to give credit to) for this:
Dear Anaheim resident who posted on Ottawa.craigslist in Rants and Raves,
Re: your posting entitled "hockey?"
Thank you soooo much for your lovely posting about the upcoming Ducks/Sens finals. Your instincts are spot on, of course, for Canadians love to be belittled by Americans not only with respect to our national pastime but on the grounds of our mere existence as well!
It was so considerate of you to get up on your Southern California soapbox in an attempt to inform your poor, deprived, igloo-dwelling neighbours to the North about things we’ve never known. In particular I think we really appreciated learning that hockey has never even been on your radar because of the “…plethora of choices regarding how to fill free time…there are sports, such as baseball, or basketball.” Well, whaddya know! For a few decades there I think we really believed that hockey was itself a sport; we can’t thank you enough for pointing out the error of our ways. I mean, ninety years of professional-level competition in North America, people for whom the game is a full-time job, a standard set of rules by which one must play, a nine-month NHL playing season in which there are televised matches every week, multi-million-dollar contracts for boys in men’s bodies, organized leagues for kids, adults and seniors – male and female – across Canada, the US and Europe… oh yes, and the men’s and women’s teams at the winter Olympics, the mother of all sporting competitions. Clearly nothing about hockey qualifies it as a sport, and it’s simply that we Canadians have been mistaken these past 150-odd years. Thanks to you, Anaheimer, we will all start watching real sports from now on. I’m sure you’ll have a list of stellar recommendations like NASCAR and WWE.
Of course, with the abundance of outdoor things to do in sunny SoCal, such as “…mountains to hike or ride a bicycle in [and] the gorgeous pacific ocean to swim in or sun ourselves beside.” Well – Canada certainly has no mountains. I mean, the Rockies definitely don’t extend into Alberta or British Columbia, and the Appalachians haven’t dominated the northern Québec landscape for the past umpteen millennia. There’s certainly no thought of hiking or biking through these nonexistent mountains. We wouldn’t dream of going hiking in our snowshoes, and we’ve never even heard of this bicycle you mentioned – does it work like a dogsled team, but with the dogs pulling a two-wheeled sled? And swimming? Forget swimming, I’m sure no one in Canada has ever even thought about this ocean of which you speak, especially not any of the 3 million people living in the greater Vancouver and greater Victoria metro areas. Now granted Ottawa isn’t even remotely near the Pacific, but even still, there’s no way you’d catch anyone from this city swimming in or taking the sun by the Ottawa River, the St. Lawrence, Lake Ontario, or any of the hundreds of other body of water in a hundred-kilometre radius. I mean, what would we be thinking – swimming, in the outdoors, in late May, in Canada? Nonsense, we’re still in our parkas!
But what has really impressed us, Anaheimer, is actually not the way in which you so joyfully condescend towards us about sports and leisure. Although we’re eternally grateful for all that your posting has taught us about the great outdoors, that’s not what impresses us most. Nor did our jaws drop at your unequivocal prediction about two teams and a game you self-professedly “…don’t know shit about.” Rather, we are fully in awe over your ability to honestly and unapologetically be forthcoming about your own ignorance:
“[A]lso, since we're being open and honest here, until about 12 hours ago i'd never even heard of ottowa [sic].”
Wow, Anaheimer – we can only imagine how much courage and strength of character that kind of declaration required. How admirable! I mean, to tell the world that you’d never even heard of Ottawa! That takes guts. Of course, I’m sure in your case the ignorance you profess is forgivable. After all, there’s certainly no reason for Ottawa to appear on your radar. As Canada’s fourth-largest city, host of a half-dozen of internationally-acclaimed festivals such as Winterlude and BluesFest, and the seat of the Canadian federal government and the Supreme Court, not to mention its location just 95km north of a U.S. border and its job as this year’s host to the FIFA U-20 World Cup (oh wait, maybe football, or soccer as you call it, isn’t a sport either?), there’s simply no reason you should ever have heard of Ottawa. I can understand completely how Ottawa could fail to catch your attention in the recent past. I mean, really, our annual murder rate of under 40 victims in a city of 1.5 million is too low to draw attention to the city. And it’s not like anything controversial ever happens here – the permissive marijuana laws we enjoy, our legalization of gay marriage, our outspoken disapproval of the invasion of Iraq, and the extremely antagonistic relationship between your quick-witted, upstanding, brilliant president and our human-rights supporting, left-leaning, multilingual former Prime Minister Chrétien, all of which came out of Ottawa, certainly did not garner the attention of fair and unbiased American news sources such as FoxNews or CNN. Oh and by the way, your consistent misspelling Ottawa in your post is a brilliantly effective way of driving your point home. Excellent tactic.
So thank you, Anaheimer, for reminding those of us in Ottawa, and Canadians in general, of how insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things. Now that we know that Southern California’s offerings in terms of the great outdoors are vastly superior to the paltry oceans, forests, lakes, mountains, ski hills, hiking trails, white water rapids, national parks, waterfalls and wildlife reserves that are within a short distance of Ottawa, we’ve realized the errors of our ways. Perhaps if we were to model ourselves after you by doing such things as swimming when it’s warm, cycling (whatever that means) to get to work, playing sports or “laying out” (translation for Canadians: this is American-speak for what is grammatically correctly referred to as "taking the sun," "tanning," or "voluntarily inducing skin cancer") the average Joe could really learn to appreciate, treasure and preserve all of the pleasures of the outdoors. And you know, we could learn a thing or two from people like you about how to acknowledge, respect and learn from people of other nations and cultures. Although it would mean that we would have to forget everything we’ve ever learned about current affairs and geography, unquestioningly assume that if it didn’t originate in America it’s not worth our time, proclaim our superior certainty on subjects we’re certain only that we know nothing about, and unabashedly profess our ignorance of basic general knowledge for the whole world to hear, well then tabarnac les amies et amis, we’d certainly be better off doing so if it meant we could be more like you.
I mean, after all, what Canadian wouldn’t want everyone else on the planet to think we’re a bunch of self-righteous, ignorant fucks?
Yours truly,
Woman from Montréal who Doesn’t Give a Shit About Hockey
Now the point that i'm trying to make isn't that Ottawa is fabulous. To be honest, I really do understand why Californians haven't heard of it. There's just too much stuff going on here to warrant any news on the REST of the US, let alone a whole other country. So unless Canada gets bombed, odds are we're not going to hear about it 'cause we've got plenty of random stuff to make the news here.
I think my point is really that us Canadians are bitter people. Bittterrrr. We're sick of being ripped on.
But really Canada...you should take PRIDE in your anonymity. California is a fantastic place to live, and I dig the OC...but what with this whole illegal immigration issue one thing is clear: once word gets out that a place is awesome, then EVERYONE wants to go there.
So...Enjoy being obscure. Canada's got some pretty awesome stuff (as listed in the post) but the whole world doesn't need to know. Really. Just appreciate what you've got and leave it at that. Maybe one day i'll be able to move back home, and I don't want to have it all go to hell.
At least the Craigslister didn't point out that Alex Trebek and William Shatner are Canadian...that's just grasping at straws.
Dear Americans: I've heard EVERYTHING already. All it does is annoy me NOT because of the comment, but because it's boring me to tears hearing all the wisecracks.
In other news, mutha effing Senators, i NEED you to win. You don't understand. The last barrage of wisecracks come from coworkers and rather than go on about how they can shove the Ducks up their ass, I'd rather bring my Sens towel to work with pride and say "yeah...you may own alotta things...but Canadians live eat breathe hockey!"....
From "best of" craigslist (I'd give credit to the poster, but there was obviously no name or email addy to give credit to) for this:
Dear Anaheim resident who posted on Ottawa.craigslist in Rants and Raves,
Re: your posting entitled "hockey?"
Thank you soooo much for your lovely posting about the upcoming Ducks/Sens finals. Your instincts are spot on, of course, for Canadians love to be belittled by Americans not only with respect to our national pastime but on the grounds of our mere existence as well!
It was so considerate of you to get up on your Southern California soapbox in an attempt to inform your poor, deprived, igloo-dwelling neighbours to the North about things we’ve never known. In particular I think we really appreciated learning that hockey has never even been on your radar because of the “…plethora of choices regarding how to fill free time…there are sports, such as baseball, or basketball.” Well, whaddya know! For a few decades there I think we really believed that hockey was itself a sport; we can’t thank you enough for pointing out the error of our ways. I mean, ninety years of professional-level competition in North America, people for whom the game is a full-time job, a standard set of rules by which one must play, a nine-month NHL playing season in which there are televised matches every week, multi-million-dollar contracts for boys in men’s bodies, organized leagues for kids, adults and seniors – male and female – across Canada, the US and Europe… oh yes, and the men’s and women’s teams at the winter Olympics, the mother of all sporting competitions. Clearly nothing about hockey qualifies it as a sport, and it’s simply that we Canadians have been mistaken these past 150-odd years. Thanks to you, Anaheimer, we will all start watching real sports from now on. I’m sure you’ll have a list of stellar recommendations like NASCAR and WWE.
Of course, with the abundance of outdoor things to do in sunny SoCal, such as “…mountains to hike or ride a bicycle in [and] the gorgeous pacific ocean to swim in or sun ourselves beside.” Well – Canada certainly has no mountains. I mean, the Rockies definitely don’t extend into Alberta or British Columbia, and the Appalachians haven’t dominated the northern Québec landscape for the past umpteen millennia. There’s certainly no thought of hiking or biking through these nonexistent mountains. We wouldn’t dream of going hiking in our snowshoes, and we’ve never even heard of this bicycle you mentioned – does it work like a dogsled team, but with the dogs pulling a two-wheeled sled? And swimming? Forget swimming, I’m sure no one in Canada has ever even thought about this ocean of which you speak, especially not any of the 3 million people living in the greater Vancouver and greater Victoria metro areas. Now granted Ottawa isn’t even remotely near the Pacific, but even still, there’s no way you’d catch anyone from this city swimming in or taking the sun by the Ottawa River, the St. Lawrence, Lake Ontario, or any of the hundreds of other body of water in a hundred-kilometre radius. I mean, what would we be thinking – swimming, in the outdoors, in late May, in Canada? Nonsense, we’re still in our parkas!
But what has really impressed us, Anaheimer, is actually not the way in which you so joyfully condescend towards us about sports and leisure. Although we’re eternally grateful for all that your posting has taught us about the great outdoors, that’s not what impresses us most. Nor did our jaws drop at your unequivocal prediction about two teams and a game you self-professedly “…don’t know shit about.” Rather, we are fully in awe over your ability to honestly and unapologetically be forthcoming about your own ignorance:
“[A]lso, since we're being open and honest here, until about 12 hours ago i'd never even heard of ottowa [sic].”
Wow, Anaheimer – we can only imagine how much courage and strength of character that kind of declaration required. How admirable! I mean, to tell the world that you’d never even heard of Ottawa! That takes guts. Of course, I’m sure in your case the ignorance you profess is forgivable. After all, there’s certainly no reason for Ottawa to appear on your radar. As Canada’s fourth-largest city, host of a half-dozen of internationally-acclaimed festivals such as Winterlude and BluesFest, and the seat of the Canadian federal government and the Supreme Court, not to mention its location just 95km north of a U.S. border and its job as this year’s host to the FIFA U-20 World Cup (oh wait, maybe football, or soccer as you call it, isn’t a sport either?), there’s simply no reason you should ever have heard of Ottawa. I can understand completely how Ottawa could fail to catch your attention in the recent past. I mean, really, our annual murder rate of under 40 victims in a city of 1.5 million is too low to draw attention to the city. And it’s not like anything controversial ever happens here – the permissive marijuana laws we enjoy, our legalization of gay marriage, our outspoken disapproval of the invasion of Iraq, and the extremely antagonistic relationship between your quick-witted, upstanding, brilliant president and our human-rights supporting, left-leaning, multilingual former Prime Minister Chrétien, all of which came out of Ottawa, certainly did not garner the attention of fair and unbiased American news sources such as FoxNews or CNN. Oh and by the way, your consistent misspelling Ottawa in your post is a brilliantly effective way of driving your point home. Excellent tactic.
So thank you, Anaheimer, for reminding those of us in Ottawa, and Canadians in general, of how insignificant we are in the grand scheme of things. Now that we know that Southern California’s offerings in terms of the great outdoors are vastly superior to the paltry oceans, forests, lakes, mountains, ski hills, hiking trails, white water rapids, national parks, waterfalls and wildlife reserves that are within a short distance of Ottawa, we’ve realized the errors of our ways. Perhaps if we were to model ourselves after you by doing such things as swimming when it’s warm, cycling (whatever that means) to get to work, playing sports or “laying out” (translation for Canadians: this is American-speak for what is grammatically correctly referred to as "taking the sun," "tanning," or "voluntarily inducing skin cancer") the average Joe could really learn to appreciate, treasure and preserve all of the pleasures of the outdoors. And you know, we could learn a thing or two from people like you about how to acknowledge, respect and learn from people of other nations and cultures. Although it would mean that we would have to forget everything we’ve ever learned about current affairs and geography, unquestioningly assume that if it didn’t originate in America it’s not worth our time, proclaim our superior certainty on subjects we’re certain only that we know nothing about, and unabashedly profess our ignorance of basic general knowledge for the whole world to hear, well then tabarnac les amies et amis, we’d certainly be better off doing so if it meant we could be more like you.
I mean, after all, what Canadian wouldn’t want everyone else on the planet to think we’re a bunch of self-righteous, ignorant fucks?
Yours truly,
Woman from Montréal who Doesn’t Give a Shit About Hockey
Now the point that i'm trying to make isn't that Ottawa is fabulous. To be honest, I really do understand why Californians haven't heard of it. There's just too much stuff going on here to warrant any news on the REST of the US, let alone a whole other country. So unless Canada gets bombed, odds are we're not going to hear about it 'cause we've got plenty of random stuff to make the news here.
I think my point is really that us Canadians are bitter people. Bittterrrr. We're sick of being ripped on.
But really Canada...you should take PRIDE in your anonymity. California is a fantastic place to live, and I dig the OC...but what with this whole illegal immigration issue one thing is clear: once word gets out that a place is awesome, then EVERYONE wants to go there.
So...Enjoy being obscure. Canada's got some pretty awesome stuff (as listed in the post) but the whole world doesn't need to know. Really. Just appreciate what you've got and leave it at that. Maybe one day i'll be able to move back home, and I don't want to have it all go to hell.
At least the Craigslister didn't point out that Alex Trebek and William Shatner are Canadian...that's just grasping at straws.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Wicked
So for our anniversary Kraig and I saw Wicked at the Pantages Theater.
Now here's my disclaimer: I never actually saw Wizard of Oz in full. I know the gist of it, but not all the details. My mother did however take me to see Return to Oz in 1985, but that doesn't make a diff.
So Wicked takes us back to the wee days when the Wicked Witch of the West (named Elphaba) is born as a result of her mom whoring herself to some dude who liked to drink green goo. Green sperm = green baby and mommy's husband hates Elphaba from the start.
Fast forward to the Saved By The Bell: The Witchy Years edition, and Elphaba is stuck going to some fancy shmancy boarding school as a caretaker for her younger sister Nessa, who's confined to a wheelchair. Daddy is apparently a governer. He gives Nessa a pair of silver sparkly slippers as "good luck in college" gift, and Elphaba gets a "don't f*ck this up, watch your little sister".
Naturally everyone's freaked out by Elphaba's green skin, so she gets the typical Molly Ringwald "freak" label. She's stuck rooming with Galinda ("That's Galinda with a Gah"), the popular blond who wants to be a witch but is more interested in the hot rebel Fiyero. The school headmistress realizes Elphaba's got special powers and makes it her pet project to encourage Elphaba's freakish talents so that one day she can meet The Wizard.
Turns out that in Oz, there's crazy racism...against animals. In Oz, animals can talk...but the hillbilly people for the most part are edging out talking animals. The last Teacher Animal (a goat) gets the boot (so much for unions) and in they bring some Nazi type dude who's all for teaching how to ensure animals never talk: by keeping them in cages.
So...you like some goat-on-green-girl action?
Elphaba's a wannabe PETA chick so she gets all pissed off, everything gets all sketchy, she and Fiyero catnap the Nazi dude's lion cub so they can bring him to safety. Naturally the lion cub is freaked out (...cowardly much?), Elphaba falls for Fiyero, Fiyero falls for Elphaba even though Galinda wants a piece of his man meat.
Yadda yadda, everyone hates Elphaba, they tease her, they think she'll melt if she gets wet, Galinda gives her the ugly pointed hat that her aunt sent her...but when they all skip out to go clubbing, Galinda ends up sticking up for Elphaba when everyone laughs at her for trying to shake her groove thang.
That night, Elphaba and Galinda (who eventually changes her name to "Glinda...the GAH is silent" to support the Goat Teacher who could never pronounce her name right) do some girl bonding by means of a makeover. Glinda confesses that she's going to marry Fiyero (he just doesn't know it yet) and Elphaba confesses that her sister is in a wheelchair because her dad was so disgusted by her green skin, he made her mom eat milkflowers during her pregnancy which of course jacked up the baby. They realize they're the best of friends.
Yay, time for a makeover! Then we can play Girltalk and use those zit stickers
Finally Elphaba gets a chance to meet the Wizard and Glinda wonders wtf is going on with Fiyero so she decides to hitch a ride with Elphaba to the Emerald City. And since everything is green in the Emerald City, Elphaba looks pretty normal. Don't know if they make green foundation, but its a start.
Does this color make me look fat?
When they go to meet the Wizard, he cons Elphaba into reading a passage in the Grimmerie, a sorcery book. Turns out, the Wizard is a two-bit hack and the college Headmistress lady is along for his evil plans. After Elphaba inadvertently gives monkeys wings, she realized the Wizard is an a-hole who is the cause for the Animals Shouldn't Talk movement. The Wizard spins everything by making it look like Elphaba is an evil witch....she gets crazy pissed off, steals the Grimmerie, creates herself a flying broom, and attempts to get Glinda to run off with her.
Glinda gets her panties in a bunch too scared to go so she says "i'll catcha later...no seriously....really...". Note that any spell can't be undone. Elphaba sneaks over to her sister's place...at this point her dad has died and Nessa is now the Governor. Governator. Whatever. Nessa's guilt tripped an old schoolmate Bac into staying by her side, even though Bac has always been in love with Glinda. Days of our Lives much? yep.
Nessa's pissed at Elphaba for not hooking up with some working legs, and Elphaba says there isn't a spell for everything BUT she can make those silver slippers make her walk...after Bac clues in, he's all "you don't need me, so catch ya on the west siiyed", Nessa gets pissed and attempt to read a spell from the Grimmerie. Bac's heart gets all jacked up, so Elphaba turns him into a Tin Man so that he'll never need that heart. Nessa blames Elphaba for this whole thing.
So basically Oz loves Glinda who's their little cheerleader, the school headmistress is now the Wizard's PR person, and the Wizard is a dick who likes to cage flying monkeys. The town's all pissed off at Elphaba 'cause they think she's an evil witch, a lion is all pissed off 'cause he says Elphaba is the reason he's cowardly, Bac blames her for being a tin man...oh the humanity.
Fiyero is the head of the army, but it comes out that he's still in love with Elphaba. Glinda gets all pissed off and tells the headmistress that to get to Elphaba, they have to get to Nessa. The headmistress starts up a storm, the house falls on Nessa, a "little girl and her dog" swipe Nessa's shoes, and Elphaba gets PISSED 'cause she wants her sister's shoes back. The rest of hte army takes Fiyero and gets ready to torture him on a Jesus-style cross...so Elphaba turns him into a scarecrow so that he'll never feel pain and he'll never die.
Or maybe she likes to get her freak on with men made of straw.
Glinda realizes that Elphaba's her best friend and who cares if Fiyero loves her instead. Elphaba just wants to off herself...she gives the Grimmerie book to Glinda and tells Glinda to NOT make excuses for her or try to redeem her after her death. The "little girl and her dog" splash water on Elphaba, and she melts....
Glinda puts the smackdown on the Wizard and the headmistress by banishing them, after realizing that the Wizard is the green goo drinker...and he's the a-hole who made everyone hate his own daughter.
Glinda then becomes the Good Witch, while we see that Elphaba never died...she and Fiyero ran off to live happily ever after.
If you have the chance to see it, I HIGHLY recommend it!
Now here's my disclaimer: I never actually saw Wizard of Oz in full. I know the gist of it, but not all the details. My mother did however take me to see Return to Oz in 1985, but that doesn't make a diff.
So Wicked takes us back to the wee days when the Wicked Witch of the West (named Elphaba) is born as a result of her mom whoring herself to some dude who liked to drink green goo. Green sperm = green baby and mommy's husband hates Elphaba from the start.
Fast forward to the Saved By The Bell: The Witchy Years edition, and Elphaba is stuck going to some fancy shmancy boarding school as a caretaker for her younger sister Nessa, who's confined to a wheelchair. Daddy is apparently a governer. He gives Nessa a pair of silver sparkly slippers as "good luck in college" gift, and Elphaba gets a "don't f*ck this up, watch your little sister".
Naturally everyone's freaked out by Elphaba's green skin, so she gets the typical Molly Ringwald "freak" label. She's stuck rooming with Galinda ("That's Galinda with a Gah"), the popular blond who wants to be a witch but is more interested in the hot rebel Fiyero. The school headmistress realizes Elphaba's got special powers and makes it her pet project to encourage Elphaba's freakish talents so that one day she can meet The Wizard.
Turns out that in Oz, there's crazy racism...against animals. In Oz, animals can talk...but the hillbilly people for the most part are edging out talking animals. The last Teacher Animal (a goat) gets the boot (so much for unions) and in they bring some Nazi type dude who's all for teaching how to ensure animals never talk: by keeping them in cages.
So...you like some goat-on-green-girl action?
Elphaba's a wannabe PETA chick so she gets all pissed off, everything gets all sketchy, she and Fiyero catnap the Nazi dude's lion cub so they can bring him to safety. Naturally the lion cub is freaked out (...cowardly much?), Elphaba falls for Fiyero, Fiyero falls for Elphaba even though Galinda wants a piece of his man meat.
Yadda yadda, everyone hates Elphaba, they tease her, they think she'll melt if she gets wet, Galinda gives her the ugly pointed hat that her aunt sent her...but when they all skip out to go clubbing, Galinda ends up sticking up for Elphaba when everyone laughs at her for trying to shake her groove thang.
That night, Elphaba and Galinda (who eventually changes her name to "Glinda...the GAH is silent" to support the Goat Teacher who could never pronounce her name right) do some girl bonding by means of a makeover. Glinda confesses that she's going to marry Fiyero (he just doesn't know it yet) and Elphaba confesses that her sister is in a wheelchair because her dad was so disgusted by her green skin, he made her mom eat milkflowers during her pregnancy which of course jacked up the baby. They realize they're the best of friends.
Yay, time for a makeover! Then we can play Girltalk and use those zit stickers
Finally Elphaba gets a chance to meet the Wizard and Glinda wonders wtf is going on with Fiyero so she decides to hitch a ride with Elphaba to the Emerald City. And since everything is green in the Emerald City, Elphaba looks pretty normal. Don't know if they make green foundation, but its a start.
Does this color make me look fat?
When they go to meet the Wizard, he cons Elphaba into reading a passage in the Grimmerie, a sorcery book. Turns out, the Wizard is a two-bit hack and the college Headmistress lady is along for his evil plans. After Elphaba inadvertently gives monkeys wings, she realized the Wizard is an a-hole who is the cause for the Animals Shouldn't Talk movement. The Wizard spins everything by making it look like Elphaba is an evil witch....she gets crazy pissed off, steals the Grimmerie, creates herself a flying broom, and attempts to get Glinda to run off with her.
Glinda gets her panties in a bunch too scared to go so she says "i'll catcha later...no seriously....really...". Note that any spell can't be undone. Elphaba sneaks over to her sister's place...at this point her dad has died and Nessa is now the Governor. Governator. Whatever. Nessa's guilt tripped an old schoolmate Bac into staying by her side, even though Bac has always been in love with Glinda. Days of our Lives much? yep.
Nessa's pissed at Elphaba for not hooking up with some working legs, and Elphaba says there isn't a spell for everything BUT she can make those silver slippers make her walk...after Bac clues in, he's all "you don't need me, so catch ya on the west siiyed", Nessa gets pissed and attempt to read a spell from the Grimmerie. Bac's heart gets all jacked up, so Elphaba turns him into a Tin Man so that he'll never need that heart. Nessa blames Elphaba for this whole thing.
So basically Oz loves Glinda who's their little cheerleader, the school headmistress is now the Wizard's PR person, and the Wizard is a dick who likes to cage flying monkeys. The town's all pissed off at Elphaba 'cause they think she's an evil witch, a lion is all pissed off 'cause he says Elphaba is the reason he's cowardly, Bac blames her for being a tin man...oh the humanity.
Fiyero is the head of the army, but it comes out that he's still in love with Elphaba. Glinda gets all pissed off and tells the headmistress that to get to Elphaba, they have to get to Nessa. The headmistress starts up a storm, the house falls on Nessa, a "little girl and her dog" swipe Nessa's shoes, and Elphaba gets PISSED 'cause she wants her sister's shoes back. The rest of hte army takes Fiyero and gets ready to torture him on a Jesus-style cross...so Elphaba turns him into a scarecrow so that he'll never feel pain and he'll never die.
Or maybe she likes to get her freak on with men made of straw.
Glinda realizes that Elphaba's her best friend and who cares if Fiyero loves her instead. Elphaba just wants to off herself...she gives the Grimmerie book to Glinda and tells Glinda to NOT make excuses for her or try to redeem her after her death. The "little girl and her dog" splash water on Elphaba, and she melts....
Glinda puts the smackdown on the Wizard and the headmistress by banishing them, after realizing that the Wizard is the green goo drinker...and he's the a-hole who made everyone hate his own daughter.
Glinda then becomes the Good Witch, while we see that Elphaba never died...she and Fiyero ran off to live happily ever after.
If you have the chance to see it, I HIGHLY recommend it!
Latest developments...
To summarize the past few weeks...
We almost moved back to the Bay Area but didn't...
Stashy poo has an eye infection (that's more of a note to myself to give him eye drops after this)
Memorial Day Weekend is coming up and i'm jonesin' to spend it all sleeping even though somehow i've got plans
I bit the bullet and hired someone to install the shower door (took the dude almost 3 hours) and install a new chandelier in the entryway (yay the gold is gone, the gold is gone)
Got Ryan to show me how to install new faucets, so the big task is whether I can actually get off my butt and do it myself now
The botox has kicked in full force...my eyebrows look like they have a crazy wicked arch
Working on the flight plan back to Canada.
/life_summary
We almost moved back to the Bay Area but didn't...
Stashy poo has an eye infection (that's more of a note to myself to give him eye drops after this)
Memorial Day Weekend is coming up and i'm jonesin' to spend it all sleeping even though somehow i've got plans
I bit the bullet and hired someone to install the shower door (took the dude almost 3 hours) and install a new chandelier in the entryway (yay the gold is gone, the gold is gone)
Got Ryan to show me how to install new faucets, so the big task is whether I can actually get off my butt and do it myself now
The botox has kicked in full force...my eyebrows look like they have a crazy wicked arch
Working on the flight plan back to Canada.
/life_summary
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Another reason why Target kicks ass
You can actually buy Wedding gowns! from Target! And they're actually very pretty! That's crazy mind blowing! And you can buy bridesmaids dresses there!
Dayam...just when I thought Target couldn't kick any more ass, they prove me wrong. WHY aren't they building one in Ladera Ranch?! There's so much roooom there...and we NEED a Target...if they built one there, I swear I'll apply for a job there...
In other news, I'm watching this thing on Punishment on the History channel...who knew that the guillotine was invented because after people complained that it was unfair for aristocrats to get special death treatment (beheading vs. hanging), the executioners complained that their swords got too blunt and there's weren't enough swords to meet the needs.
And in final news, yay for my husband and i for celebrating our 4 year anniversary...dang, nothing makes you learn more about life than marriage. We're going to see Wicked at the Pantages theater to celebrate. Kah toe mahhhh tayyy!
Dayam...just when I thought Target couldn't kick any more ass, they prove me wrong. WHY aren't they building one in Ladera Ranch?! There's so much roooom there...and we NEED a Target...if they built one there, I swear I'll apply for a job there...
In other news, I'm watching this thing on Punishment on the History channel...who knew that the guillotine was invented because after people complained that it was unfair for aristocrats to get special death treatment (beheading vs. hanging), the executioners complained that their swords got too blunt and there's weren't enough swords to meet the needs.
And in final news, yay for my husband and i for celebrating our 4 year anniversary...dang, nothing makes you learn more about life than marriage. We're going to see Wicked at the Pantages theater to celebrate. Kah toe mahhhh tayyy!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Gotta love Harvey...Celebrity Fit Club
This is so beautiful, I don't know where to begin...watching Harvey's vein pop out of his head or watching someone actually flip out on retarded Screech:
An American's guide to us Canadians!
Since I'm pretty homesick and there's a chance I won't be able to go back home this summer, I found a fabulous website (an American's guide to Canada) that explains stuff to Americans about Canadians. Here's some of the best (everything non-italicized is courtesy of Emily Way emily_@_americansguide.ca):
What Every Canadian Knows
Thrills gum
A purple gum that looks like Chiclets. "Tastes like soap." I've never tried it -- I have some sitting in the cupboard downstairs, but I loathe gum -- but everyone says "tastes like soap!" whenever it's mentioned.
To be honest, i"ve seen it...i don't know anyone that's ever tried it. Doesnt' look appealing. In fact, I never even knew what it was called.
Canadian Tire money
Canadian Tire, a nationwide chain of great big automotive and hardware stores (many with attached gas stations), offers discounts in the form of Canadian Tire coupons to customers who pay cash. The coupons look like currency and can be spent at Canadian Tire just like cash. I don't think I've met a Canadian who doesn't have a stash of Canadian Tire money. There's even a Canadian Tire Coupon Collectors' Club.
HELL YEAH! My mom probably is a zillionaire when it comes to Canadian Tire money. It's so weird...you buy stuff, they give you canadian tire money. You go to buy more stuff with your canadian tire money, and they give you more money in return. Over time you're basically just exchanging monopoly money.
Why everyone wears poppies in early November
November 11, known as Veterans' Day in the US, is called Remembrance Day in Canada. In 1915, Lt. Col. John McCrae wrote a beautiful and moving poem called "In Flanders Fields":
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
This poem became very famous, and people began to associate war dead and veterans with poppies. The Web site for the Ministry of Veterans' Affairs has more about John McCrae and the symbolism of the poppy.
Now, the Canadian Legion sells poppy pins every year, starting around the end of October, and everyone wears them on their jackets.
This was actually a pretty big shock for me to realize that in the US, they don't know about Flanders Fields and all that. It's sorta sad, 'cause I dig getting poppies in November. Whenever we had school assemblies we'd make wreaths and cover them with homemade poppies which is really just taking a chunk of red tissue paper, putting it on the end of a pencil, dipping it in glue, and then sticking it to something (obviously the pencil doesn't stick, it's just to create the shape). Funny, I thought kids in the US did that too.
Language
anglophone
A Canadian whose first language is English.
francophone
A Canadian whose first language is French.
brown bread
In most of Canada, whole wheat bread. If you are at a diner for breakfast and you ask for whole wheat toast, they'll understand you, but "brown toast" is a lot more Canadian. Down east, "brown bread" refers to a sweetened, molasses bread.
Seriously. SERIOUSLY. It didn't even cross my mind that here in the US it's not called brown bread. Have I been saying wheat this entire time? It's all about the brown bread! yeah!
butter tart
A very small (single-serving) pie. They taste like pecan pies without the pecans. This is a fairly typical recipe. They're yummy.
Once again...i truly thought that was the word everyone uses. Kraig was like "wtf is that?"
donair
A pita containing spiced meat and a sauce made from sugar, vinegar, milk, and garlic.
I don't think I've ever had a donair, but they're everywhere...kinda like here in the US you'll see ghetto liquor stores that say "Liquor, cigarettes, deli"...well in Canada it's the donair.
Glosettes
Brand name for chocolate-covered raisins.
I really miss these. There's also Glosettes peanuts, but everyone just buys peanut M&Ms when they want chocolate-covered peanuts. I haven't found anything similar to Glosette raisins here though.
homo milk
Homogenized milk. Known in the States as whole milk. Nobody here thinks twice about what images milk cartons with the word "HOMO" in big letters on the side conjure up in the minds of Americans. A friend notes: "The term whole milk is actually used in Canada too, but refers to something different. Homo milk is homogenized milk with a butterfat content of 3.25%. Whole milk is not homogenized (it will separate if left standing for any period of time; this is the milk our parents drank). Almost all milk today is homogenized, although whole milk can still be found if one looks."
Yeah learned the hard way not to call it homo milk. Plus I say "skim milk" and people are like "WHAT?!"...the proper term in the US is "fat free milk"...
icing sugar
powdered sugar
Seriously, do they not call it that here?!!
Kraft Dinner, or KD
Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. No difference between what's in the boxes, just what's on them. Canadians eat a lot of KD.
Bring on the KD! Although my mom wouldn't letu s have that stuff in our house, I grew up going to friends' homes and whipping that stuff up after school. I saw a South Park Episode ("Not without my anus") last night and all they did was say "Let's have some Kraft Dinner"...to be exact, you would just say "KD".
Nanaimo bar
A confection, named for the town of Nanaimo on Vancouver Island in British Columbia, that resembles a brownie but is topped with a layer of white butter cream icing and another of solid chocolate. The brownie part usually has coconut.
I've made Nanaimo Bars for people herei n the US and there isn't a single person who doesn't think it's pure heaven. If heaven were made of butter and fat.SOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOD!
poutine (pron. poo-TEEN)
Quebecois specialty. French fries covered in cheese curds and gravy.
Single handedly the number food item I miss most. I seriously fantasize about poutine. It gets me into a frenzy just thinking about it. I'm salivating as I type.
Rockets
Small, chalky candies packaged in rolls wrapped in clear plastic.
Okay this is where it gets complicated. What Canadians call Rockets are what Americans call Smarties. But what Canadian call Smarties are like super sugary versions of chocolate M&Ms.
Smarties
Not the ones you're used to seeing in the US. In Canada, Smarties are a candy resembling M&Ms. They do melt in your hand, and they're a lot sweeter. Smarties conoisseurs eat the red ones last.
True dat on the last sentence.
Timbits
Do(ugh)nut holes from Tim Horton's.
Mmm mmm mmm. Tim Horton's has doughnuts like Dunkin' Donuts. However since I live in Southern California, it's all about the Krispy Kremes. Which are nasty airy sugar coated pieces of garbage. Mmmmm timbits.
Beer Store
Where you buy beer in Ontario.
Every Canadian is in shock that they can buy liquor int he US anywhere. In Ontario (I can't speak for other provinces that much) you can only buy beer at the Beer Store, and liquore at the LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario). And they dont' stay open late, so if you need to do another beer run you gotta do it by like 8pm.
flat
A two-four.
I've NEVER heard of a "flat" before. But in case anyone cares, a two-four (aka TWO-FER) is a 24 case of beer. No one says "pick up a case"...they say, "get a two-fer".
LCBO
The Liquor Control Board of Ontario. Generally refers to the government-run chain of liquor stores.
See Beer Store...
mickey
A measurement of alcohol (13 ounces: it's a flat, curved bottle, supposed to fit in your pocket, but it doesn't, really).
I can't believe people here don't use the word mickey for that!
loonie
A dollar. The Canadian $1 coin has a loon (the bird) on the back.
No one really says "give me a dollar"...you would typically say "gimme a loonie" or "a buck". I think the dollar coin was introduced when I was in elementary school, so it's still a relatively new concept.
toonie, doubloon
The $2 coin. Gold in the middle, with a silver ring around the outside. The Queen is one one side, and a polar bear is on the other. (Several people have written to remind me of the painful little joke that the coin could be called a "moonie" because it's "the Queen with a bear behind." Har har.) When the coins were introduced in the winter of 1995-1996, Canada was overcome by a frenzy to pop out the middles of the coins. This was especially popular on the Prairies, where there's not much to do in the winter. (Would you go outside any more than you had to when it's -40 for days on end?) The most successful method for destroying this new piece of currency seems to be to put it in the freezer for a while and then hit it with a hammer. Throwing it off tall buildings was popular, too. The craze passed pretty quickly, though.
Yep, totally true. I was in high school at the time, and everyone was concerned over what they'd call it. For the record, Canadians have always been all about the $2 bill...it's a little odd to me to not have anything between a dollar and a $5 in my wallet. And yes, Canadian wallets get pretty heavy.
Holidays
Boxing Day
The day after Christmas. So named because of the British tradition of giving gift boxes to people such as mail carriers, milkmen, etc., on December 26. In Canada, Boxing Day is the date for many huge annual sales.
True dat.
Canada Day
Canada's birthday. July 1, the anniversary of the Confederation of Canada in 1867. The day is marked by parties and fireworks.
And ridiculous amount of drinking. Not so much about BBQing like July 4th is in the US.
The May Two-Four
See "Victoria Day"
Remembrance Day
November 11, known in the US as "Veterans' Day." Canadians were important and valiant fighters in the two world wars, and are still known and respected as military peacekeepers. See "Why everyone wears poppies in early November."
Thanksgiving
Celebrated on the second Monday of October, to reflect that Canada's harvest comes earlier than the American one. Very similar to the American Thanksgiving -- family get-togethers, big turkey dinner with potatoes, gravy, etc. -- but not as big a deal here, and there's no mention at all of Pilgrims.
Victoria Day
Queen Victoria's birthday, May 24th. It's celebrated the Monday before Memorial Day. Beer is the official beverage of the Victoria Day weekend, because it's more or less the first weekend of the summer, when everyone goes to their cottages or cabins and opens them up for the first time since fall.
If you're American, be aware that Canadians don't celebrate Independence Day (duh), Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Columbus Day, Memorial Day, or Presidents' Day.
Yeah people have asked me that actually. And yes, Canadians celebrate Hallowe'en.
runners
sneakers, running shoes
Oh come ON...don't tell me Americans don't call them runners either!!
toque
Rhymes with "kook." A kind of hat, ubiquitous in wintertime.
A toque is one of those knit hats that have a pom-pom thingy on the top.
corner store
A small variety store, usually on a corner in a residential neighbourhood of a city. Similar to the American "convenience store."
Please, people use corner store here...right?
dépanneur
A corner store or convenience store in Quebec.
And the only reason people care is because you can buy liquor there, and people elsewhere in canada think it's such a novelty to buy liquor at a convenience store.
eavestrough
A gutter, the sort that is attached to houses and funnels rain water down a pipe.
Okay that has GOT to be used here. I'm sure I saw that word in Family Handyman.
elastic
rubber band
Really, seriously, that word I had to get used to not saying at work..."elastic? A what? OHHH you mean a rubber band"...
Gravol
dramamine
Now you'd think this wouldn't be a big deal to learn, right? Shortly after I dated Kraig we took a cruise to the Bahamas. And he would talk about dramamine, and I'd be like "WTF? You mean Gravol?" and he'd be all "What language are you speaking you foreigner!"
GST
The dreaded Goods and Services Tax, 7% that goes on top of just about every purchase (in addition to the provincial sales taxes). The current Prime Minister, Jean Chrétien, got elected partly because he promised to get rid of this tax (also called the "Grab and Steal Tax" or the "Gouge and Screw Tax), and then promptly didn't. If you're visiting Canada and spend enough money, you can get your GST back by mail after you've gone home. Ask about this at the border.
Whoa, i didn't know i could get that back. Mother effer!
Joe job
A job passed down to the person lowest on the totem pole, as in "Let Joe do it."
Hmmm, I never thought about that. I guess we do use that term.
keener
Someone very eager and enthusiastic. Sometimes derogatory, in the sense of brown-noser, suckup, bootlicker. Someone obviously trying to get into someone else's good books.
Now this one I STILL use to this day, and every time people are like "a WHAT?!". I usually say "look at you being an eager keener". So if i say that, now you know what it means.
Pogo
A brand name for a corn dog (hot dog dipped in batter and then deep fried).
This is the word that prompted me to search the web and eventually find this site. I was talking to Kraig and Nicole about my friend Christine craving a Pogo after she got her wisdom teeth out, and they were like "uhh...corn dog?"...no one says corn dog in Canada. In fact, that sounds rather hillbilly.
reserve, or "rez"
A parcel of land allotted for Native Canadians, aboriginals, or Indians.
I'm pretty sure they say that here in the US too.
serviette
French for "napkin." This term is used by anglophones as well as francophones. One visitor noted that younger people don't seem to use this term.
I actually laughed when I saw this. Regardless if you're English or French, you do say serviette. Serviette implies a paper towel type, whereas napkin implies the fabric fancy shmancy kind.
The States
The USA. Canadians hate referring to the US as "America," because Canadians are just as much North Americans as Americans are.
True dat.
klick
Kilometer, or kilometer per hour. "Better slow down, Vern, the limit's 90 klicks here. Hand me the bottle."
Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa. Yep.
Joe Louis
Cake treat similar to a Twinkie, with chocolate cake and a white icing interior. Available in Ontario and Quebec. No actual natural or redeeming ingredients.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM I love Joe Louis! Funny it never crossed my mind you can't get Joe Louis or those moon pie thingies here...replaced by Little Debbit cakes.
canteen
can refer to a cafeteria or snack counter
This was new to me. Checked with Kraig. He told me the obvious answer that it's what soldiers use to hold water. Yeah we use that too, but canteen is also the snack bar at like a high school sporting event.
Jargon
Although the American and Canadian educational systems are similar in many respects, there are notable differences that can confuse people pretty thoroughly. Here's a list of Canadian educational terms, followed by their American equivalents:
Grade x ("She's in grade three")
xth grade
Once again, another thing I had to get used to. Along with Freshman, Sophmore, Junior, Senior...
Write a test
Take a test
Marks
Grades. In Canada, teachers mark students' work instead of grading it, and take "marks off" if the students give wrong answers.
We use grades too. But i never thought of the difference...but yeah, we say "what's your mark?" instead of "what's your grade?"
Supply teacher
Substitute teacher
Ha hahaaaaaaaaaaa....i think we all know in Canada that Supply Teacher isn't the proper term, but that's just what you say.
College
Community college or technical school
Now this is huge. Getting used to the educational system. If you went to UCI, you'd probably say you went to College. In Canada, college is like....Saddleback.
University
Four-year, degree-granting college or university
If you went to university, you would NEVER say that you went to college.
Residence ("He lives in residence")
Dormitory ("He lives in the dorms")
True dat. Dorms are so...american.
OAC, grade 13
An extra year of high school after grade 12, intended for students going on to university (not college). Only in Ontario, and they're phasing it out.
And that's why I did 5 years of high school. It's kinda like a pre-university year. You only truly need 6 OAC classes (I took 9 'cause you still gottaknow your stuff for university). Like let's say you wanted to pursue a B.Sc. in biology at university. Then you absolutely had to have: OAC English, OAC Calculus, OAC Algebra/Geometry, OAC Biology, OAC Chemistry, OAC Physics. Or something like that.
CEGEP (pronounced SAY-zhep)
In Québec, a post-high school college offering two-year pre-university programs and three-year professional development programs. CEGEP stands for Collège d'enseignement général et professionel. There are a few English-language CEGEPs and many French-language ones.
This one's for Nicole 'cause she asked me about it once.
Coles Notes
Analogous to Cliff Notes; Coles is a national chain of bookstores. A friend tells me that Coles Notes celebrated their 50th anniversary in 1998, and the press coverage noted that the original Cliff Notes were licenced versions of Coles Notes.
skipping out
cutting class
No one says "skipping out"...you just say "I skipped class" or "I'm gonna skip all afternoon". No one says "cut class".
minor niner
Ontario term for person in grade 9. In Ontario, high schools currently range from grades 9 to 13. Someone in grade 9 is indeed a minor niner.
Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Yep.
Canadians don't use the terms "freshman," "sophomore," "junior," or "senior," for high school or college students. What Americans would call "juniors in high school" are "grade elevens." University students are referred to according to what year they're in: an American junior would be a third-year in Canada.
What Every Canadian Knows
Thrills gum
A purple gum that looks like Chiclets. "Tastes like soap." I've never tried it -- I have some sitting in the cupboard downstairs, but I loathe gum -- but everyone says "tastes like soap!" whenever it's mentioned.
To be honest, i"ve seen it...i don't know anyone that's ever tried it. Doesnt' look appealing. In fact, I never even knew what it was called.
Canadian Tire money
Canadian Tire, a nationwide chain of great big automotive and hardware stores (many with attached gas stations), offers discounts in the form of Canadian Tire coupons to customers who pay cash. The coupons look like currency and can be spent at Canadian Tire just like cash. I don't think I've met a Canadian who doesn't have a stash of Canadian Tire money. There's even a Canadian Tire Coupon Collectors' Club.
HELL YEAH! My mom probably is a zillionaire when it comes to Canadian Tire money. It's so weird...you buy stuff, they give you canadian tire money. You go to buy more stuff with your canadian tire money, and they give you more money in return. Over time you're basically just exchanging monopoly money.
Why everyone wears poppies in early November
November 11, known as Veterans' Day in the US, is called Remembrance Day in Canada. In 1915, Lt. Col. John McCrae wrote a beautiful and moving poem called "In Flanders Fields":
In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.
Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
This poem became very famous, and people began to associate war dead and veterans with poppies. The Web site for the Ministry of Veterans' Affairs has more about John McCrae and the symbolism of the poppy.
Now, the Canadian Legion sells poppy pins every year, starting around the end of October, and everyone wears them on their jackets.
This was actually a pretty big shock for me to realize that in the US, they don't know about Flanders Fields and all that. It's sorta sad, 'cause I dig getting poppies in November. Whenever we had school assemblies we'd make wreaths and cover them with homemade poppies which is really just taking a chunk of red tissue paper, putting it on the end of a pencil, dipping it in glue, and then sticking it to something (obviously the pencil doesn't stick, it's just to create the shape). Funny, I thought kids in the US did that too.
Language
anglophone
A Canadian whose first language is English.
francophone
A Canadian whose first language is French.
brown bread
In most of Canada, whole wheat bread. If you are at a diner for breakfast and you ask for whole wheat toast, they'll understand you, but "brown toast" is a lot more Canadian. Down east, "brown bread" refers to a sweetened, molasses bread.
Seriously. SERIOUSLY. It didn't even cross my mind that here in the US it's not called brown bread. Have I been saying wheat this entire time? It's all about the brown bread! yeah!
butter tart
A very small (single-serving) pie. They taste like pecan pies without the pecans. This is a fairly typical recipe. They're yummy.
Once again...i truly thought that was the word everyone uses. Kraig was like "wtf is that?"
donair
A pita containing spiced meat and a sauce made from sugar, vinegar, milk, and garlic.
I don't think I've ever had a donair, but they're everywhere...kinda like here in the US you'll see ghetto liquor stores that say "Liquor, cigarettes, deli"...well in Canada it's the donair.
Glosettes
Brand name for chocolate-covered raisins.
I really miss these. There's also Glosettes peanuts, but everyone just buys peanut M&Ms when they want chocolate-covered peanuts. I haven't found anything similar to Glosette raisins here though.
homo milk
Homogenized milk. Known in the States as whole milk. Nobody here thinks twice about what images milk cartons with the word "HOMO" in big letters on the side conjure up in the minds of Americans. A friend notes: "The term whole milk is actually used in Canada too, but refers to something different. Homo milk is homogenized milk with a butterfat content of 3.25%. Whole milk is not homogenized (it will separate if left standing for any period of time; this is the milk our parents drank). Almost all milk today is homogenized, although whole milk can still be found if one looks."
Yeah learned the hard way not to call it homo milk. Plus I say "skim milk" and people are like "WHAT?!"...the proper term in the US is "fat free milk"...
icing sugar
powdered sugar
Seriously, do they not call it that here?!!
Kraft Dinner, or KD
Kraft Macaroni and Cheese. No difference between what's in the boxes, just what's on them. Canadians eat a lot of KD.
Bring on the KD! Although my mom wouldn't letu s have that stuff in our house, I grew up going to friends' homes and whipping that stuff up after school. I saw a South Park Episode ("Not without my anus") last night and all they did was say "Let's have some Kraft Dinner"...to be exact, you would just say "KD".
Nanaimo bar
A confection, named for the town of Nanaimo on Vancouver Island in British Columbia, that resembles a brownie but is topped with a layer of white butter cream icing and another of solid chocolate. The brownie part usually has coconut.
I've made Nanaimo Bars for people herei n the US and there isn't a single person who doesn't think it's pure heaven. If heaven were made of butter and fat.SOOOOO GOOOOOOOOOD!
poutine (pron. poo-TEEN)
Quebecois specialty. French fries covered in cheese curds and gravy.
Single handedly the number food item I miss most. I seriously fantasize about poutine. It gets me into a frenzy just thinking about it. I'm salivating as I type.
Rockets
Small, chalky candies packaged in rolls wrapped in clear plastic.
Okay this is where it gets complicated. What Canadians call Rockets are what Americans call Smarties. But what Canadian call Smarties are like super sugary versions of chocolate M&Ms.
Smarties
Not the ones you're used to seeing in the US. In Canada, Smarties are a candy resembling M&Ms. They do melt in your hand, and they're a lot sweeter. Smarties conoisseurs eat the red ones last.
True dat on the last sentence.
Timbits
Do(ugh)nut holes from Tim Horton's.
Mmm mmm mmm. Tim Horton's has doughnuts like Dunkin' Donuts. However since I live in Southern California, it's all about the Krispy Kremes. Which are nasty airy sugar coated pieces of garbage. Mmmmm timbits.
Beer Store
Where you buy beer in Ontario.
Every Canadian is in shock that they can buy liquor int he US anywhere. In Ontario (I can't speak for other provinces that much) you can only buy beer at the Beer Store, and liquore at the LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario). And they dont' stay open late, so if you need to do another beer run you gotta do it by like 8pm.
flat
A two-four.
I've NEVER heard of a "flat" before. But in case anyone cares, a two-four (aka TWO-FER) is a 24 case of beer. No one says "pick up a case"...they say, "get a two-fer".
LCBO
The Liquor Control Board of Ontario. Generally refers to the government-run chain of liquor stores.
See Beer Store...
mickey
A measurement of alcohol (13 ounces: it's a flat, curved bottle, supposed to fit in your pocket, but it doesn't, really).
I can't believe people here don't use the word mickey for that!
loonie
A dollar. The Canadian $1 coin has a loon (the bird) on the back.
No one really says "give me a dollar"...you would typically say "gimme a loonie" or "a buck". I think the dollar coin was introduced when I was in elementary school, so it's still a relatively new concept.
toonie, doubloon
The $2 coin. Gold in the middle, with a silver ring around the outside. The Queen is one one side, and a polar bear is on the other. (Several people have written to remind me of the painful little joke that the coin could be called a "moonie" because it's "the Queen with a bear behind." Har har.) When the coins were introduced in the winter of 1995-1996, Canada was overcome by a frenzy to pop out the middles of the coins. This was especially popular on the Prairies, where there's not much to do in the winter. (Would you go outside any more than you had to when it's -40 for days on end?) The most successful method for destroying this new piece of currency seems to be to put it in the freezer for a while and then hit it with a hammer. Throwing it off tall buildings was popular, too. The craze passed pretty quickly, though.
Yep, totally true. I was in high school at the time, and everyone was concerned over what they'd call it. For the record, Canadians have always been all about the $2 bill...it's a little odd to me to not have anything between a dollar and a $5 in my wallet. And yes, Canadian wallets get pretty heavy.
Holidays
Boxing Day
The day after Christmas. So named because of the British tradition of giving gift boxes to people such as mail carriers, milkmen, etc., on December 26. In Canada, Boxing Day is the date for many huge annual sales.
True dat.
Canada Day
Canada's birthday. July 1, the anniversary of the Confederation of Canada in 1867. The day is marked by parties and fireworks.
And ridiculous amount of drinking. Not so much about BBQing like July 4th is in the US.
The May Two-Four
See "Victoria Day"
Remembrance Day
November 11, known in the US as "Veterans' Day." Canadians were important and valiant fighters in the two world wars, and are still known and respected as military peacekeepers. See "Why everyone wears poppies in early November."
Thanksgiving
Celebrated on the second Monday of October, to reflect that Canada's harvest comes earlier than the American one. Very similar to the American Thanksgiving -- family get-togethers, big turkey dinner with potatoes, gravy, etc. -- but not as big a deal here, and there's no mention at all of Pilgrims.
Victoria Day
Queen Victoria's birthday, May 24th. It's celebrated the Monday before Memorial Day. Beer is the official beverage of the Victoria Day weekend, because it's more or less the first weekend of the summer, when everyone goes to their cottages or cabins and opens them up for the first time since fall.
If you're American, be aware that Canadians don't celebrate Independence Day (duh), Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Columbus Day, Memorial Day, or Presidents' Day.
Yeah people have asked me that actually. And yes, Canadians celebrate Hallowe'en.
runners
sneakers, running shoes
Oh come ON...don't tell me Americans don't call them runners either!!
toque
Rhymes with "kook." A kind of hat, ubiquitous in wintertime.
A toque is one of those knit hats that have a pom-pom thingy on the top.
corner store
A small variety store, usually on a corner in a residential neighbourhood of a city. Similar to the American "convenience store."
Please, people use corner store here...right?
dépanneur
A corner store or convenience store in Quebec.
And the only reason people care is because you can buy liquor there, and people elsewhere in canada think it's such a novelty to buy liquor at a convenience store.
eavestrough
A gutter, the sort that is attached to houses and funnels rain water down a pipe.
Okay that has GOT to be used here. I'm sure I saw that word in Family Handyman.
elastic
rubber band
Really, seriously, that word I had to get used to not saying at work..."elastic? A what? OHHH you mean a rubber band"...
Gravol
dramamine
Now you'd think this wouldn't be a big deal to learn, right? Shortly after I dated Kraig we took a cruise to the Bahamas. And he would talk about dramamine, and I'd be like "WTF? You mean Gravol?" and he'd be all "What language are you speaking you foreigner!"
GST
The dreaded Goods and Services Tax, 7% that goes on top of just about every purchase (in addition to the provincial sales taxes). The current Prime Minister, Jean Chrétien, got elected partly because he promised to get rid of this tax (also called the "Grab and Steal Tax" or the "Gouge and Screw Tax), and then promptly didn't. If you're visiting Canada and spend enough money, you can get your GST back by mail after you've gone home. Ask about this at the border.
Whoa, i didn't know i could get that back. Mother effer!
Joe job
A job passed down to the person lowest on the totem pole, as in "Let Joe do it."
Hmmm, I never thought about that. I guess we do use that term.
keener
Someone very eager and enthusiastic. Sometimes derogatory, in the sense of brown-noser, suckup, bootlicker. Someone obviously trying to get into someone else's good books.
Now this one I STILL use to this day, and every time people are like "a WHAT?!". I usually say "look at you being an eager keener". So if i say that, now you know what it means.
Pogo
A brand name for a corn dog (hot dog dipped in batter and then deep fried).
This is the word that prompted me to search the web and eventually find this site. I was talking to Kraig and Nicole about my friend Christine craving a Pogo after she got her wisdom teeth out, and they were like "uhh...corn dog?"...no one says corn dog in Canada. In fact, that sounds rather hillbilly.
reserve, or "rez"
A parcel of land allotted for Native Canadians, aboriginals, or Indians.
I'm pretty sure they say that here in the US too.
serviette
French for "napkin." This term is used by anglophones as well as francophones. One visitor noted that younger people don't seem to use this term.
I actually laughed when I saw this. Regardless if you're English or French, you do say serviette. Serviette implies a paper towel type, whereas napkin implies the fabric fancy shmancy kind.
The States
The USA. Canadians hate referring to the US as "America," because Canadians are just as much North Americans as Americans are.
True dat.
klick
Kilometer, or kilometer per hour. "Better slow down, Vern, the limit's 90 klicks here. Hand me the bottle."
Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa. Yep.
Joe Louis
Cake treat similar to a Twinkie, with chocolate cake and a white icing interior. Available in Ontario and Quebec. No actual natural or redeeming ingredients.
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM I love Joe Louis! Funny it never crossed my mind you can't get Joe Louis or those moon pie thingies here...replaced by Little Debbit cakes.
canteen
can refer to a cafeteria or snack counter
This was new to me. Checked with Kraig. He told me the obvious answer that it's what soldiers use to hold water. Yeah we use that too, but canteen is also the snack bar at like a high school sporting event.
Jargon
Although the American and Canadian educational systems are similar in many respects, there are notable differences that can confuse people pretty thoroughly. Here's a list of Canadian educational terms, followed by their American equivalents:
Grade x ("She's in grade three")
xth grade
Once again, another thing I had to get used to. Along with Freshman, Sophmore, Junior, Senior...
Write a test
Take a test
Marks
Grades. In Canada, teachers mark students' work instead of grading it, and take "marks off" if the students give wrong answers.
We use grades too. But i never thought of the difference...but yeah, we say "what's your mark?" instead of "what's your grade?"
Supply teacher
Substitute teacher
Ha hahaaaaaaaaaaa....i think we all know in Canada that Supply Teacher isn't the proper term, but that's just what you say.
College
Community college or technical school
Now this is huge. Getting used to the educational system. If you went to UCI, you'd probably say you went to College. In Canada, college is like....Saddleback.
University
Four-year, degree-granting college or university
If you went to university, you would NEVER say that you went to college.
Residence ("He lives in residence")
Dormitory ("He lives in the dorms")
True dat. Dorms are so...american.
OAC, grade 13
An extra year of high school after grade 12, intended for students going on to university (not college). Only in Ontario, and they're phasing it out.
And that's why I did 5 years of high school. It's kinda like a pre-university year. You only truly need 6 OAC classes (I took 9 'cause you still gottaknow your stuff for university). Like let's say you wanted to pursue a B.Sc. in biology at university. Then you absolutely had to have: OAC English, OAC Calculus, OAC Algebra/Geometry, OAC Biology, OAC Chemistry, OAC Physics. Or something like that.
CEGEP (pronounced SAY-zhep)
In Québec, a post-high school college offering two-year pre-university programs and three-year professional development programs. CEGEP stands for Collège d'enseignement général et professionel. There are a few English-language CEGEPs and many French-language ones.
This one's for Nicole 'cause she asked me about it once.
Coles Notes
Analogous to Cliff Notes; Coles is a national chain of bookstores. A friend tells me that Coles Notes celebrated their 50th anniversary in 1998, and the press coverage noted that the original Cliff Notes were licenced versions of Coles Notes.
skipping out
cutting class
No one says "skipping out"...you just say "I skipped class" or "I'm gonna skip all afternoon". No one says "cut class".
minor niner
Ontario term for person in grade 9. In Ontario, high schools currently range from grades 9 to 13. Someone in grade 9 is indeed a minor niner.
Ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Yep.
Canadians don't use the terms "freshman," "sophomore," "junior," or "senior," for high school or college students. What Americans would call "juniors in high school" are "grade elevens." University students are referred to according to what year they're in: an American junior would be a third-year in Canada.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Rules for the 30+
As my descent into madness continues (I got botox on Saturday...i'll post the before/after pics wheni get off my ass and upload them somewhere)...iv'e decided its time to create the general list of rules to abide by in my 30s. Because once i'm IN my 30s, it'll be too late.
My inspiration is a list I got from Cosmopolitan:
Moves that look lame past 30
Here's my "rules" for life in my 30s:
1. No more staying out past midnight on new year's eve. Wherever I am at midnight is where I'm sleeping.
2. No more clubbing past 11pm unless I'm with my husband OR i'm seeing a friend i havent' seen in ages. After 11, if you're not single, its kinda boring.
3. Seriously need to put the smackdown on the use of "and I'm all like, whatever, and she's all...". LIKE is not a word for SAID. ALL is not a word for SAID.
4. I will not feel bad declining events if I'm just in a grouchy mood or tired or whatever. Obligation is a thing of the 20s...in my 30s, I don't need to justify the use of my time. Suck it.
5. I will be diligent about taking vitamins.
6. I will be diligent about proper posture.
7. If I should ever be single again (aliens abduct Kraig, i don't know!), I refuse to embrace the cougar lifestyle. I will remember that any activity that a 21-year-old mocks is never a good thing.
8. I will never buy beaded glasses-holders.
9. I will go through my old makeup and chuck anything that seemed okay when I was a crazy drunk party girl but just not okay now. Do I really need ten different shades of aqua, purple, and other "only looks good in black light" makeup?
10. I will wear sunblock even if i'm NOT going out in the sun.
More to come as I think of them....
My inspiration is a list I got from Cosmopolitan:
Moves that look lame past 30
- Going the backpacker/hostel/couch-surf route every vacation.
- Dressing like a sexy cat, sexy devil, sexy cheerleader, or sexy hooker for Hallowe'en. oh thank the LORD...the pressure to be sexy at Hallowe'en is a bitch.
- Hitting last call and making out with a new guy each weekend. Too bad for all the Cougars out there..apparently they're all "lame".
- Screaming at your mom on the phone where people can hear. When is that EVER okay?
- Habitually skimping on your share when the check comes. Once again...was that okay to do in your 20s?!
- Ceasing communication with friends the minute you meet a guy. This also applies to a guy you've dated forEVER. He'll be there tomorrow. Chill. ANd if he's not there tomorrow, why the eff is he getting your free time and not your friends?!
- Buying drinks with "sexy" names that aren't clever, just plain dirty. WTF drink has that bad of a title?
- Prefacing every bite of junk food with "OMG, i'm soooo bad!!!"
- Using multiple emotions or LOLs within any email, text, or IM Okay i'm guilty for that. I use LOL alot and ":P" alot. Time to get that habit in check.
Here's my "rules" for life in my 30s:
1. No more staying out past midnight on new year's eve. Wherever I am at midnight is where I'm sleeping.
2. No more clubbing past 11pm unless I'm with my husband OR i'm seeing a friend i havent' seen in ages. After 11, if you're not single, its kinda boring.
3. Seriously need to put the smackdown on the use of "and I'm all like, whatever, and she's all...". LIKE is not a word for SAID. ALL is not a word for SAID.
4. I will not feel bad declining events if I'm just in a grouchy mood or tired or whatever. Obligation is a thing of the 20s...in my 30s, I don't need to justify the use of my time. Suck it.
5. I will be diligent about taking vitamins.
6. I will be diligent about proper posture.
7. If I should ever be single again (aliens abduct Kraig, i don't know!), I refuse to embrace the cougar lifestyle. I will remember that any activity that a 21-year-old mocks is never a good thing.
8. I will never buy beaded glasses-holders.
9. I will go through my old makeup and chuck anything that seemed okay when I was a crazy drunk party girl but just not okay now. Do I really need ten different shades of aqua, purple, and other "only looks good in black light" makeup?
10. I will wear sunblock even if i'm NOT going out in the sun.
More to come as I think of them....
Movie Review: THE QUEEN
Movie Review: THE QUEEN
Odds are, you haven't heard of this movie. Or Helen Mirren. In case you care, she won the Oscar for her role as Queen Elizabeth II.
If you don't give a crap about the British Monarchy, then this movie is NOT for you. It's pretty slow, and in fact there's not really an ending...all it does is tell the story from the Queen's side during the time that Tony Blair got elected and Princess Diana's subsequent death. That's it. There's no resolution, and we all pretty much know what happened (the monarchy was accused of being cold and Elton John sang at the funeral).
"Is my refrigerator running? Why I believe it is....you want me to run after it? How rude!"
That being said, I adore the monarchy so I actually really enjoyed this movie. I can't justify WHY i like the monarchy...they're pretty useless. But since it's not my tax money that goes towards their elaborate lifestyles, I'm free to enjoy this somewhat archaic institution. I dig that they represent a particular class, that they have to always behave and look a certain way, that they're basically the country's mascots. I love that in an era before Paris Hilton and a pantyless-Britney Spears, they were what everyone wanted to be: rich, regal, eloquent, refined, and fabulous wardrobes.
They represent fairy tales.
Helen Mirren looks absolutely identical to the Queen, which sort of freaks you out after awhile. And she nailed the Queen's bow-legged walk.The other characters are a bit hard to distinguish becuase they weren't aiming for physical similarities.
The movie does a fabulous job of showing us the mentality from the inside. Apparently the week that Diana died, they stayed in Scotland and only came back upon pressure from Tony Blair for the funeral. As far as they were concerned, they thought "well...she's not a part of our family. It's up to the Spencers to decide how they want to handle it. We're not going to make a public statement because this is a family matter and the main concern right now is the boys. "
Their problem was that they underestimated the hold that Diana had on the people. You can't blame the Queen...why should she break centuries-old tradition for a chick who not only divorced from her family, who isn't an HRH anymore, but also pretty much spent the rest of her life publicly humiliating the monarchy? (I love Diana, but the girl really did know how to manipulate the press).
The flag is only flown to indicate when the royal family is in town...it has never, ever flown at half-mast before. So naturally the Queen was like "wtf, when my dad the KING died we didn't put the flag at half mast, why are we doing it for what is basically a regular civilian?". To be fair, there was some level of hysteria...if the monarchy were to cave every time people went psycho then...well they'd be really bad monarchy.
On the other hand, they really should have stayed in tune with how huge Diana was all around the world. In an era with the internet and all that, it would have been wise to address the death with a random statement saying "we're upset, the boys are grieving, now leave us the eff alone".
One thing I didn't know was that Elizabeth II had been a mechanic during the war. This isn't some hoity-toity princess-like chick...this woman is strong and has learned to fend for herself. Much like any female figurehead, she has to be stern and void of public feeling.
Anyway, alot of that is played out in the movie. Overall, VERY well done. Entertaining? Nope. Shocking? Nope. Interesting? Only to those of us who dig the monarchy.
As a side note, I think in my lifetime the death of Diana is the equivalent of the death of JFK. I remember exactly where I was (in Toronto visiting family), I remember all of us crowding around the tv, I remember all of us telling each other to shut up...I remember getting pretty emotional 'cause I grew up loving hte monarchy...my parents were married in England and i remember staying up watching Fergie and Andrew's wedding with her (too young to remember Diana's wedding). Plus the consipiracy theories will probably never go away. I can't believe it's been 10 years since she died...and thanks to her, Posh and Beckham are the new paparazzi favorites.
Odds are, you haven't heard of this movie. Or Helen Mirren. In case you care, she won the Oscar for her role as Queen Elizabeth II.
If you don't give a crap about the British Monarchy, then this movie is NOT for you. It's pretty slow, and in fact there's not really an ending...all it does is tell the story from the Queen's side during the time that Tony Blair got elected and Princess Diana's subsequent death. That's it. There's no resolution, and we all pretty much know what happened (the monarchy was accused of being cold and Elton John sang at the funeral).
"Is my refrigerator running? Why I believe it is....you want me to run after it? How rude!"
That being said, I adore the monarchy so I actually really enjoyed this movie. I can't justify WHY i like the monarchy...they're pretty useless. But since it's not my tax money that goes towards their elaborate lifestyles, I'm free to enjoy this somewhat archaic institution. I dig that they represent a particular class, that they have to always behave and look a certain way, that they're basically the country's mascots. I love that in an era before Paris Hilton and a pantyless-Britney Spears, they were what everyone wanted to be: rich, regal, eloquent, refined, and fabulous wardrobes.
They represent fairy tales.
Helen Mirren looks absolutely identical to the Queen, which sort of freaks you out after awhile. And she nailed the Queen's bow-legged walk.The other characters are a bit hard to distinguish becuase they weren't aiming for physical similarities.
The movie does a fabulous job of showing us the mentality from the inside. Apparently the week that Diana died, they stayed in Scotland and only came back upon pressure from Tony Blair for the funeral. As far as they were concerned, they thought "well...she's not a part of our family. It's up to the Spencers to decide how they want to handle it. We're not going to make a public statement because this is a family matter and the main concern right now is the boys. "
Their problem was that they underestimated the hold that Diana had on the people. You can't blame the Queen...why should she break centuries-old tradition for a chick who not only divorced from her family, who isn't an HRH anymore, but also pretty much spent the rest of her life publicly humiliating the monarchy? (I love Diana, but the girl really did know how to manipulate the press).
The flag is only flown to indicate when the royal family is in town...it has never, ever flown at half-mast before. So naturally the Queen was like "wtf, when my dad the KING died we didn't put the flag at half mast, why are we doing it for what is basically a regular civilian?". To be fair, there was some level of hysteria...if the monarchy were to cave every time people went psycho then...well they'd be really bad monarchy.
On the other hand, they really should have stayed in tune with how huge Diana was all around the world. In an era with the internet and all that, it would have been wise to address the death with a random statement saying "we're upset, the boys are grieving, now leave us the eff alone".
One thing I didn't know was that Elizabeth II had been a mechanic during the war. This isn't some hoity-toity princess-like chick...this woman is strong and has learned to fend for herself. Much like any female figurehead, she has to be stern and void of public feeling.
Anyway, alot of that is played out in the movie. Overall, VERY well done. Entertaining? Nope. Shocking? Nope. Interesting? Only to those of us who dig the monarchy.
As a side note, I think in my lifetime the death of Diana is the equivalent of the death of JFK. I remember exactly where I was (in Toronto visiting family), I remember all of us crowding around the tv, I remember all of us telling each other to shut up...I remember getting pretty emotional 'cause I grew up loving hte monarchy...my parents were married in England and i remember staying up watching Fergie and Andrew's wedding with her (too young to remember Diana's wedding). Plus the consipiracy theories will probably never go away. I can't believe it's been 10 years since she died...and thanks to her, Posh and Beckham are the new paparazzi favorites.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Yeah i haven't written in awhile. Lots of stuff has been going on and I'm not really in the mood to go in detail.
Today was the first day I've ever donated blood. It's not that I never WANTED to give blood...but in the past either I had something that required brainpower (like exams), i was way under the weight limit, or I had gotten a piercing. So today I scoped it out and figured taht I could fudge my weight enough in order to meet the requirements.
First they make you read this big huge schpiel about HIV, making sure you didn't have man-on-man sex, that you didn't travel to Random Country X...since I scoped it all out online I pretty much whipped through that. The volunteer lady was trying to get the attention of the nurses who were sitting around yakking. I was like "you need to holler!" but she told me they get mad at her for that...I'm like "you're a volunteer, you can yell all you want".
This is a side note: there's a type of person and job that basically means you do the crappy stuff but you're not exactly the type who'll fare well beyond a government job. I love slacking off or whatever, but I'm all about impressions. And government-type jobs offer such a guarantee, people don't mind taking hour long smokes breaks and all that. I'm not saying all government workers are slackers...my dad is a government employee and he works his ass off...but i can also say that ALOT of people i went to high school with who were slackers somehow ended up in the government. Put it this way: your perception of job stability is drastically different when you have a government-type job. It's not like every little project is what's going to make or break the organization and cause everyone to be laid off. I've done government work, i've done private sector work, and there's a HUGE difference in attitude. If today's blood drive had been run by an organization that had stocks, competitors, etc...there's no WAY those chicks would have been sitting around while a "customer" was waiting.That's the beauty of job stability...people will ALWAYS need blood.
So finally one chick came over and brought me beyind a screen where music was blaring so no one would hear us chat. She pricked my finger (which i knew was gonna hurt like a mofo 'cause they use the same tools that diabetics use, and i've used mine before when scoping out how much pain it was for me to take blood regularly from my cat). That was to check my iron levels. Then she put this paper stick thing in my mouth...it was a disposable thermometer. Took my blood pressure...then she left me alone to fill out some info on the laptop.
The questions pretty much consisted, once again, about man-on-man sex, diseases in South America, and whether I've ever had Hepatitis. Once that's done, they brought me over to a bed that looked like it came straight out of M*A*S*H. They scoped out my veins...which is pretty easily, since my veins look like a bodybuilder's on steroids...they bulge out of my arms.
So I'm chatting with the two nurse ladies about my cell phone (I thought it was going to take like an hour so i wanted entertainment) because they thought it was cute, and i'm asking them all these questions about who's most likely to faint, cry, blah blah...i asked if i could see the bag after its done...they asked me to turn away to not see the needle and I"m like "blah blah needles dont' bug me"...
Ohhh there's a REASON they don't show you the needle. I don't even know how that thing pierced my skin. It was crazy ass huge. My initial reaction was "dayyyyam...that is a big ass needle"...but the other nurse yelled "look over here! Think happy martinis" and did this cute little dance.
Then I sat there for a few minutes squeezing a ball, being bored out of my mind, my arm started to hurt, and i got super cold. Shortly after they disconnected the bag (they let me feel it...it's all warrrrm), they somehow managed to hook up one of those plastic thingies they normally use to draw blood and then take some more samples in a tube. After that I drank some water, juice, had some cookies...
I got to stand up and cheer when I found out taht I had the record so far that day for the fastest blood-pint-filling...6 minutes! And that's from rounding up! Woo hoo! One dude was there for like 20 minutes, wtf.
When I left, I was all "thank you ladies, I'll make sure to recommend you to all my friends"...uhhh not that the blood bank works that way. Overall, a pretty good experience...the literature part is a pain and having to sit around bored (and FREEZING) is a pain, but the actual blood withdrawal was a snap. The nurses were fabulous, and that volunteer was nice to let me quiz her about life in retirement (the secret: pay off your house and your car and retirement will be a breeze).
The nurses told me that high school kids are most prone to donating (way to go kids!), and chicks more than guys. But lots of high school chicks are anemic, so they faint more. And when one girl faints it becomes mass hysteria 'cause girls get all "omg my best friend! ohhhh myyy gawwwdd!".
I'm pretty surprised, I knew the stats were pretty low for donation...but i didn't know if was 2% out of people who are ELLIGIBLE! wtf! So subtract people who travel, weigh too little, and enjoy man-on-man boning, only 2% of the leftover people donate?! WTF people I didn't even meet the requirements and I still stepped up to the plate! I'm nto saying if you know you've got HIV to donate, but geezus...
Anyway, that's my story for today. I'm done chugging water and I'm sneaking in a diet pepsi 'cause i gotta have at least ONE (which is better than my normal 6-8...and yesterday I drank tea at work...its getting better people).
In quickie tv news:
1. Lost has picked up its pace and gotten SUPER good.
2. Heroes better get back on track, lately I've been pretty bored. Someone needs to shoot both Jessica/Nicky and Micah.
3. Desperate Housewives: slowly catching up, forgot how good that show is.
4. Notes from the Underbelly: my new favorite show. LOVE IT.
This weekend's home improvement project: replacing the faucets. Let's see how much can be accomplished with the least amount of water damage.
Today was the first day I've ever donated blood. It's not that I never WANTED to give blood...but in the past either I had something that required brainpower (like exams), i was way under the weight limit, or I had gotten a piercing. So today I scoped it out and figured taht I could fudge my weight enough in order to meet the requirements.
First they make you read this big huge schpiel about HIV, making sure you didn't have man-on-man sex, that you didn't travel to Random Country X...since I scoped it all out online I pretty much whipped through that. The volunteer lady was trying to get the attention of the nurses who were sitting around yakking. I was like "you need to holler!" but she told me they get mad at her for that...I'm like "you're a volunteer, you can yell all you want".
This is a side note: there's a type of person and job that basically means you do the crappy stuff but you're not exactly the type who'll fare well beyond a government job. I love slacking off or whatever, but I'm all about impressions. And government-type jobs offer such a guarantee, people don't mind taking hour long smokes breaks and all that. I'm not saying all government workers are slackers...my dad is a government employee and he works his ass off...but i can also say that ALOT of people i went to high school with who were slackers somehow ended up in the government. Put it this way: your perception of job stability is drastically different when you have a government-type job. It's not like every little project is what's going to make or break the organization and cause everyone to be laid off. I've done government work, i've done private sector work, and there's a HUGE difference in attitude. If today's blood drive had been run by an organization that had stocks, competitors, etc...there's no WAY those chicks would have been sitting around while a "customer" was waiting.That's the beauty of job stability...people will ALWAYS need blood.
So finally one chick came over and brought me beyind a screen where music was blaring so no one would hear us chat. She pricked my finger (which i knew was gonna hurt like a mofo 'cause they use the same tools that diabetics use, and i've used mine before when scoping out how much pain it was for me to take blood regularly from my cat). That was to check my iron levels. Then she put this paper stick thing in my mouth...it was a disposable thermometer. Took my blood pressure...then she left me alone to fill out some info on the laptop.
The questions pretty much consisted, once again, about man-on-man sex, diseases in South America, and whether I've ever had Hepatitis. Once that's done, they brought me over to a bed that looked like it came straight out of M*A*S*H. They scoped out my veins...which is pretty easily, since my veins look like a bodybuilder's on steroids...they bulge out of my arms.
So I'm chatting with the two nurse ladies about my cell phone (I thought it was going to take like an hour so i wanted entertainment) because they thought it was cute, and i'm asking them all these questions about who's most likely to faint, cry, blah blah...i asked if i could see the bag after its done...they asked me to turn away to not see the needle and I"m like "blah blah needles dont' bug me"...
Ohhh there's a REASON they don't show you the needle. I don't even know how that thing pierced my skin. It was crazy ass huge. My initial reaction was "dayyyyam...that is a big ass needle"...but the other nurse yelled "look over here! Think happy martinis" and did this cute little dance.
Then I sat there for a few minutes squeezing a ball, being bored out of my mind, my arm started to hurt, and i got super cold. Shortly after they disconnected the bag (they let me feel it...it's all warrrrm), they somehow managed to hook up one of those plastic thingies they normally use to draw blood and then take some more samples in a tube. After that I drank some water, juice, had some cookies...
I got to stand up and cheer when I found out taht I had the record so far that day for the fastest blood-pint-filling...6 minutes! And that's from rounding up! Woo hoo! One dude was there for like 20 minutes, wtf.
When I left, I was all "thank you ladies, I'll make sure to recommend you to all my friends"...uhhh not that the blood bank works that way. Overall, a pretty good experience...the literature part is a pain and having to sit around bored (and FREEZING) is a pain, but the actual blood withdrawal was a snap. The nurses were fabulous, and that volunteer was nice to let me quiz her about life in retirement (the secret: pay off your house and your car and retirement will be a breeze).
The nurses told me that high school kids are most prone to donating (way to go kids!), and chicks more than guys. But lots of high school chicks are anemic, so they faint more. And when one girl faints it becomes mass hysteria 'cause girls get all "omg my best friend! ohhhh myyy gawwwdd!".
I'm pretty surprised, I knew the stats were pretty low for donation...but i didn't know if was 2% out of people who are ELLIGIBLE! wtf! So subtract people who travel, weigh too little, and enjoy man-on-man boning, only 2% of the leftover people donate?! WTF people I didn't even meet the requirements and I still stepped up to the plate! I'm nto saying if you know you've got HIV to donate, but geezus...
Anyway, that's my story for today. I'm done chugging water and I'm sneaking in a diet pepsi 'cause i gotta have at least ONE (which is better than my normal 6-8...and yesterday I drank tea at work...its getting better people).
In quickie tv news:
1. Lost has picked up its pace and gotten SUPER good.
2. Heroes better get back on track, lately I've been pretty bored. Someone needs to shoot both Jessica/Nicky and Micah.
3. Desperate Housewives: slowly catching up, forgot how good that show is.
4. Notes from the Underbelly: my new favorite show. LOVE IT.
This weekend's home improvement project: replacing the faucets. Let's see how much can be accomplished with the least amount of water damage.
Thursday, May 03, 2007
Letter to the editor...
Sears guy $80 or spend $10 and 15 hours of your time trying to get it to work.
I'd rather have the guy put it in with a warranty, and spend my 15 hours doing something more productive... like sitting on a couch watching UFC re-runs and Joe Dirt for the 20th time.
Good lord it didn't take us 15 hours, and the thermostat is right in the living room, so the TV was on anyway. I'd say...maybe 1 hour of actual installation time, and maybe a total of 2 hours research time but that doesn't count 'cause I did that with a laptop while watching tv anyway (and I like researching this stuff).
So...3 hours plus newfound electrical knowledge for $10...vs. $80...not worth it. And the warranty is only for one year, which is hardly worth it for an $80 piece of plastic.
In the past 3 years of owning a home, I've learned:
- how to replace and install a chandelier
- how to replace and install a bathroom fan
- the "proper" way to drill holes in wood to avoid splitting
- how to maintain a garbage disposal when the kitchen pipes lay flat
- how to replace bathroom showerheads (no easy feat when the pipe thingies are INSIDE the wall not outside like now...thanks 1980s for making retarded home building decisions)
- how to clean and maintain outdoor wood structures
- heck, how to use a cordless drill
- kraig learned how to change out the plugs
- and a bunch of other random stuff....
Right now i'm researching how to replace the bathroom fixtures. Yay for plumbing.
All of that seems pretty minor, but for Kraig and I that's pretty huge. When he grew up, his brother was the construction guy and took care of everything. As for me, when I moved out of my parents' house, I always rented (and my dad is an engineer fo the Coast Guard, so he took care of crap himself)...so needing anything beyond a hammer and a screwdriver was wayyyy out of my realm. Now...i actually LIKE reading home improvement books and scoping out Home Depot...
The way I figure it, there's no excuse for me to pay money if its something I can do myself. Like washing my car...is it a pain? Sure. Is it time consuming? Yep. But..wtf, there's no reason why I can't do it myself and then treat myself to a pedicure later (okay well I wouldn't treat myself to a pedicure..but..well it gives me an excuse to meet up with friends for lunch instead of staying in).
Now the odds of me being able to replace the carpet with hardwood...that's a whole other issue because the cost of the mistake is significantly higher than just hiring someone (who already has the tools and can get things at a discount)...although if I had the tools already I wouldnt' mind learning from someone else how to do it. Oh and I don't have the vacation time to take days off work for it. BUT...in theory...i really would like to learn how.
That being said, I really just want to win the lottery so that I can sit around, watch tv, get fat, get liposuction, and never have to lift a finger ever again.
I'd rather have the guy put it in with a warranty, and spend my 15 hours doing something more productive... like sitting on a couch watching UFC re-runs and Joe Dirt for the 20th time.
Good lord it didn't take us 15 hours, and the thermostat is right in the living room, so the TV was on anyway. I'd say...maybe 1 hour of actual installation time, and maybe a total of 2 hours research time but that doesn't count 'cause I did that with a laptop while watching tv anyway (and I like researching this stuff).
So...3 hours plus newfound electrical knowledge for $10...vs. $80...not worth it. And the warranty is only for one year, which is hardly worth it for an $80 piece of plastic.
In the past 3 years of owning a home, I've learned:
- how to replace and install a chandelier
- how to replace and install a bathroom fan
- the "proper" way to drill holes in wood to avoid splitting
- how to maintain a garbage disposal when the kitchen pipes lay flat
- how to replace bathroom showerheads (no easy feat when the pipe thingies are INSIDE the wall not outside like now...thanks 1980s for making retarded home building decisions)
- how to clean and maintain outdoor wood structures
- heck, how to use a cordless drill
- kraig learned how to change out the plugs
- and a bunch of other random stuff....
Right now i'm researching how to replace the bathroom fixtures. Yay for plumbing.
All of that seems pretty minor, but for Kraig and I that's pretty huge. When he grew up, his brother was the construction guy and took care of everything. As for me, when I moved out of my parents' house, I always rented (and my dad is an engineer fo the Coast Guard, so he took care of crap himself)...so needing anything beyond a hammer and a screwdriver was wayyyy out of my realm. Now...i actually LIKE reading home improvement books and scoping out Home Depot...
The way I figure it, there's no excuse for me to pay money if its something I can do myself. Like washing my car...is it a pain? Sure. Is it time consuming? Yep. But..wtf, there's no reason why I can't do it myself and then treat myself to a pedicure later (okay well I wouldn't treat myself to a pedicure..but..well it gives me an excuse to meet up with friends for lunch instead of staying in).
Now the odds of me being able to replace the carpet with hardwood...that's a whole other issue because the cost of the mistake is significantly higher than just hiring someone (who already has the tools and can get things at a discount)...although if I had the tools already I wouldnt' mind learning from someone else how to do it. Oh and I don't have the vacation time to take days off work for it. BUT...in theory...i really would like to learn how.
That being said, I really just want to win the lottery so that I can sit around, watch tv, get fat, get liposuction, and never have to lift a finger ever again.
Video game article...
Since so many people ask me about my husband's job (since most of all of ours is about as interesting to discuss as the merits of watching paint dry), I read this article today on MSNBC about video game making as a profession...from a wife's perspective, they nailed it:
Sure, it's a cool job. But do games pay?
Annual survey finds that industry's median salary is $73,000
By Kristin Kalning
MSNBC
Updated: 3:00 p.m. PT May 2, 2007
When I told my mother I was dating a guy who made video games, there was a long pause on the other end of the phone.
“Is that a good way to make a living?” she asked.
She needn’t have worried. That guy, who became my husband, has a great job in a booming industry. His colleagues are smart and talented. And the salaries are nothing to sneeze at. According to Game Developer Magazine’s annual salary survey, the median salary in the video game biz is $73,000.
That sounds like a lot, doesn’t it? These folks aren’t saving lives or even doing your taxes. So why would the typical game developer — whose average age is somewhere between 31 and 35 — make twice as much as the average social worker?
“Because the industry as a whole makes a lot of money,” says Matthew Tateishi, a San Francisco-based game designer with nearly 13 years of experience. “And for the most part, a lot of that gets passed on to the employees.”
Big business, big salaries
Of course you’ve read the stories about game-industry revenues topping $12.5 billion in the United States last year. Video games are big business. I know my mom read that story. It’s bragging ammo when her friends look skeptical about her son-in-law’s profession.
But if you think game-makers spend all day playing “Quake,” think again. This is a fast-paced, competitive business with inflexible ship dates and punishing hours.
Exactly. This is why I can rarely commit to anything with Kraig in terms of formal plans, because I never know down the road if he's going to be stuck at work. Heck, awhile back we had to flake on Rena's bday because Kraig was working late on a Saturday night.
“If you want to work nine to five, this is the wrong industry,” says David Riley of the NPD Group. “Deadlines are fierce.”
So are the pressures. Only about 10 percent of games released in a given year will make any real money. And every few years, the technology changes — new hardware, new software.
“Who knows how to program for the PS3 right now? Nobody.” says Marc Mencher, president of GameRecruiter.com. “It’s a limited talent pool.”
Steep learning curve
To stay cutting edge, development teams need to learn all new systems every couple of years. Artist, programmers, designers — nobody’s exempt from the steep learning curve. And the fan base can be punishing if a game doesn’t meet expectations.
It's pretty crazy...I'm in tech, but in the grand scheme the technology just improves over time. It's not like things stay the same for 2 years and then suddenly there's a brand new thing to work with. And it kind of blows for us, because for him to stay current that means he's gotta own the most current game systems...wtf we can't afford a PS3, XBox 360, PSP, and a Wii! (So we just have a Wii).
This tends to translate into some pretty long hours — called “crunch” in the game biz. The industry is rife with horror stories that sound like urban legends: Two years worth of 70-hour weeks, no weekends. Postponed weddings until ship dates. Guys phoning the office from the delivery room.
“Full-time game developers in most states are classified as exempt, meaning they're not eligible for overtime,” says Jill Duffy, managing editor of Game Developer Magazine and the principal researcher on the salary survey. “Developers do work immense amounts of overtime.”
Game Developer’s survey cuts across all disciplines in the industry: art, design, programming, business and quality assurance. And it’s a national average, pulling in salaries earned by developers in places like North Carolina as well as high-rent areas like San Francisco.
High cost of living
With a few notable exceptions, most game development hubs are in expensive areas like the Bay Area, Los Angeles and Seattle. So when you factor in cost of living, says Marc Mencher, president of gamerecruiter.com, that average salary just isn’t that high.
“That might be the average across America,” he says. “But who’s going to be able to live on $73,000 in San Francisco?”
One of the most telling metrics of the survey, says Duffy, are the home-ownership numbers. While California game-makers pull in the most money — a median of $79,000 per year — only 36 percent of those surveyed own a home.
“The outdated American standard of having a wife and a kid and a house is pretty hard in the Bay Area,” says Dan Chao, a producer and designer with PlayFirst in San Francisco.
When I first moved to the bay area someone told me this, which is very true: the bay area is meant for single guys. If you've got a wife and kids, forget it. It's not that it's impossible...obviously that's not the case. But even renting something half-decent in and around san francisco will run you over $2500 for a 1 bedroom apartment. If you think Orange County is expensive, figure this...the median home price here is like $400K, whereas in San Francisco it's $800K. That's nuts to pay for a place that probably doesn't even have a garage.
Chao, who got a degree in computer science, worked as a programmer in the “core” games industry — the one that gives you PlayStation, “World of Warcraft” and “Final Fantasy.” A few years ago, he switched gears out of programming, and then into the more relaxed casual games industry.
“People are getting paid less in casual games,” he says. “But you can really leave work at 6 or 5:30 and you’re not sitting there working until 2 in the morning.”
What's a casual game and how do I get my husband into it?!!!!
Wanted: Better quality of life
Quality of life issues are coming to the fore in game development, says Mencher. As game developers move from their 20s into their 30s, they want more stable jobs — and are even willing to trade life in the hubs for lower-cost areas.
“Five or six years ago, it was impossible to pull people from San Francisco and L.A.,” he says. “Now I call and they say ‘get me out of here.’”
Some developers “age out,” tired of the long hours, the constant pressure and the ever-present fear of the pink slip. Which is why it’s so important, says Duffy, for young people looking at games as a career to know what they’re in for — and have a backup plan. “You’re very likely to get fed up with the game industry,” she says.
True dat. I sometimes feel bad because I know Kraig's missing out on opportunities because of me. When we were engaged he had an offer for a company north of LA (don't want to give away the exact location)..but it was so pricey to live there and so when he scoped out the more affordable, commutable areas he realized it wasn't an option if he was going to be married; a place that's safe for a single guy isn't necessarily safe for a married chick and potentially children.
Such was the case with Ron Little, a senior-level programmer from Half Moon Bay, Calif., who left the business altogether in 2001.
I have no comment on that, just that I wonder if Ron Little ever got called Chicken Little when he was...well...little.
“I took a salary cut to go out of game industry, but I was tired of the volatility,” he says. “I wanted more time with family.”
But after programming tools for a civil engineering company for nearly six years, he accepted a position as a senior software engineer at Sony — back in games, with a significant salary bump.
But Little says he’s motivated to jump back into the fray for reasons other than money.
“It’s enticing to have your work be appreciated by a lot of people,” he says. “And it’s a rush to see your product on store shelves.”
Christine Miller, a Seattle-based level designer with seven years of experience, agrees. “$73,000 sounds great until you realize you've just spent 6 months or more working 80 hour weeks, your friends forgot who you are and you haven’t seen your new niece or nephew yet,” she says.
“But I can't picture doing anything else.”
© 2007 MSNBC Interactive
Sure, it's a cool job. But do games pay?
Annual survey finds that industry's median salary is $73,000
By Kristin Kalning
MSNBC
Updated: 3:00 p.m. PT May 2, 2007
When I told my mother I was dating a guy who made video games, there was a long pause on the other end of the phone.
“Is that a good way to make a living?” she asked.
She needn’t have worried. That guy, who became my husband, has a great job in a booming industry. His colleagues are smart and talented. And the salaries are nothing to sneeze at. According to Game Developer Magazine’s annual salary survey, the median salary in the video game biz is $73,000.
That sounds like a lot, doesn’t it? These folks aren’t saving lives or even doing your taxes. So why would the typical game developer — whose average age is somewhere between 31 and 35 — make twice as much as the average social worker?
“Because the industry as a whole makes a lot of money,” says Matthew Tateishi, a San Francisco-based game designer with nearly 13 years of experience. “And for the most part, a lot of that gets passed on to the employees.”
Big business, big salaries
Of course you’ve read the stories about game-industry revenues topping $12.5 billion in the United States last year. Video games are big business. I know my mom read that story. It’s bragging ammo when her friends look skeptical about her son-in-law’s profession.
But if you think game-makers spend all day playing “Quake,” think again. This is a fast-paced, competitive business with inflexible ship dates and punishing hours.
Exactly. This is why I can rarely commit to anything with Kraig in terms of formal plans, because I never know down the road if he's going to be stuck at work. Heck, awhile back we had to flake on Rena's bday because Kraig was working late on a Saturday night.
“If you want to work nine to five, this is the wrong industry,” says David Riley of the NPD Group. “Deadlines are fierce.”
So are the pressures. Only about 10 percent of games released in a given year will make any real money. And every few years, the technology changes — new hardware, new software.
“Who knows how to program for the PS3 right now? Nobody.” says Marc Mencher, president of GameRecruiter.com. “It’s a limited talent pool.”
Steep learning curve
To stay cutting edge, development teams need to learn all new systems every couple of years. Artist, programmers, designers — nobody’s exempt from the steep learning curve. And the fan base can be punishing if a game doesn’t meet expectations.
It's pretty crazy...I'm in tech, but in the grand scheme the technology just improves over time. It's not like things stay the same for 2 years and then suddenly there's a brand new thing to work with. And it kind of blows for us, because for him to stay current that means he's gotta own the most current game systems...wtf we can't afford a PS3, XBox 360, PSP, and a Wii! (So we just have a Wii).
This tends to translate into some pretty long hours — called “crunch” in the game biz. The industry is rife with horror stories that sound like urban legends: Two years worth of 70-hour weeks, no weekends. Postponed weddings until ship dates. Guys phoning the office from the delivery room.
“Full-time game developers in most states are classified as exempt, meaning they're not eligible for overtime,” says Jill Duffy, managing editor of Game Developer Magazine and the principal researcher on the salary survey. “Developers do work immense amounts of overtime.”
Game Developer’s survey cuts across all disciplines in the industry: art, design, programming, business and quality assurance. And it’s a national average, pulling in salaries earned by developers in places like North Carolina as well as high-rent areas like San Francisco.
High cost of living
With a few notable exceptions, most game development hubs are in expensive areas like the Bay Area, Los Angeles and Seattle. So when you factor in cost of living, says Marc Mencher, president of gamerecruiter.com, that average salary just isn’t that high.
“That might be the average across America,” he says. “But who’s going to be able to live on $73,000 in San Francisco?”
One of the most telling metrics of the survey, says Duffy, are the home-ownership numbers. While California game-makers pull in the most money — a median of $79,000 per year — only 36 percent of those surveyed own a home.
“The outdated American standard of having a wife and a kid and a house is pretty hard in the Bay Area,” says Dan Chao, a producer and designer with PlayFirst in San Francisco.
When I first moved to the bay area someone told me this, which is very true: the bay area is meant for single guys. If you've got a wife and kids, forget it. It's not that it's impossible...obviously that's not the case. But even renting something half-decent in and around san francisco will run you over $2500 for a 1 bedroom apartment. If you think Orange County is expensive, figure this...the median home price here is like $400K, whereas in San Francisco it's $800K. That's nuts to pay for a place that probably doesn't even have a garage.
Chao, who got a degree in computer science, worked as a programmer in the “core” games industry — the one that gives you PlayStation, “World of Warcraft” and “Final Fantasy.” A few years ago, he switched gears out of programming, and then into the more relaxed casual games industry.
“People are getting paid less in casual games,” he says. “But you can really leave work at 6 or 5:30 and you’re not sitting there working until 2 in the morning.”
What's a casual game and how do I get my husband into it?!!!!
Wanted: Better quality of life
Quality of life issues are coming to the fore in game development, says Mencher. As game developers move from their 20s into their 30s, they want more stable jobs — and are even willing to trade life in the hubs for lower-cost areas.
“Five or six years ago, it was impossible to pull people from San Francisco and L.A.,” he says. “Now I call and they say ‘get me out of here.’”
Some developers “age out,” tired of the long hours, the constant pressure and the ever-present fear of the pink slip. Which is why it’s so important, says Duffy, for young people looking at games as a career to know what they’re in for — and have a backup plan. “You’re very likely to get fed up with the game industry,” she says.
True dat. I sometimes feel bad because I know Kraig's missing out on opportunities because of me. When we were engaged he had an offer for a company north of LA (don't want to give away the exact location)..but it was so pricey to live there and so when he scoped out the more affordable, commutable areas he realized it wasn't an option if he was going to be married; a place that's safe for a single guy isn't necessarily safe for a married chick and potentially children.
Such was the case with Ron Little, a senior-level programmer from Half Moon Bay, Calif., who left the business altogether in 2001.
I have no comment on that, just that I wonder if Ron Little ever got called Chicken Little when he was...well...little.
“I took a salary cut to go out of game industry, but I was tired of the volatility,” he says. “I wanted more time with family.”
But after programming tools for a civil engineering company for nearly six years, he accepted a position as a senior software engineer at Sony — back in games, with a significant salary bump.
But Little says he’s motivated to jump back into the fray for reasons other than money.
“It’s enticing to have your work be appreciated by a lot of people,” he says. “And it’s a rush to see your product on store shelves.”
Christine Miller, a Seattle-based level designer with seven years of experience, agrees. “$73,000 sounds great until you realize you've just spent 6 months or more working 80 hour weeks, your friends forgot who you are and you haven’t seen your new niece or nephew yet,” she says.
“But I can't picture doing anything else.”
© 2007 MSNBC Interactive
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Victory is ours mooo ha ha haaaaaaaaaaa....
I am the master genius....I did mass amounts of research and figured out why there were thermostat problems...Kraig played electrician and followed my feeble attempt at leadership...and VOILA....thermostat works.
I feel ALOT better for not paying the Sears guy over $80 for the thermostat installation considering this one was one sale for less than $10 at Target.
I feel ALOT better for not paying the Sears guy over $80 for the thermostat installation considering this one was one sale for less than $10 at Target.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Mel Gibson's the Passion Fanclub....
So what you are saying is that you don't relate well to your parents generation? Therefore they deserve to get skipped? Sounds like age discrimination to me.
Didn't your mom & dad love you enough?
Ahhhh...its not age discrimination...It's discrimination against the "next in line to the throne" so to speak. If you're running for president, prime minister, next in line to being King...just do everyone a favor and let your kid take that spot.
And don't be dissin' my parents! Only *I* can make fun of my parents!!!
In other news, I was all for giving the thermostat a second attempt, however after some research online I started to get freaked out about horror stories about electrocution and not knowing if my thermostat is 24vdc...vac? Aaack see!
After realizing that I might have to admit defeat to the thermostat, I picked up Family Handyman's issue of "Essential Home Skills" (Family Handyman kicks ass for any homeowner...too bad I had a subscription when I was effing renting and I threw most of them out) so even if I can't change a thermostat at least I can learn How to keep my appliances humming as well as how to Burglar-proof your home.
Didn't your mom & dad love you enough?
Ahhhh...its not age discrimination...It's discrimination against the "next in line to the throne" so to speak. If you're running for president, prime minister, next in line to being King...just do everyone a favor and let your kid take that spot.
And don't be dissin' my parents! Only *I* can make fun of my parents!!!
In other news, I was all for giving the thermostat a second attempt, however after some research online I started to get freaked out about horror stories about electrocution and not knowing if my thermostat is 24vdc...vac? Aaack see!
After realizing that I might have to admit defeat to the thermostat, I picked up Family Handyman's issue of "Essential Home Skills" (Family Handyman kicks ass for any homeowner...too bad I had a subscription when I was effing renting and I threw most of them out) so even if I can't change a thermostat at least I can learn How to keep my appliances humming as well as how to Burglar-proof your home.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Letters to the editor...
Marlene: lol Kraig just rolls with it...
I haven't seen this movie, but I have seen pix and lil video clips of Jessica Simpson which makes me almost wanna get it. There are better movies out there right now, so I think that I'll pass.
Yep, there are WAYYYYYYYYY better movies out there. And all of those pix/videos that you've seen are pretty much 99% of what you'd want to see anyway. She's barely in the movie, and when she is (other than the stuff you've seen), she's trying to look "tough" by fixing some plumbing (and no, you don't see any cleave or a$$)...I figured at the very least watching her half naked would be good inspiration to work out, but even that infamous bikini scene (when she walks in the police station) was all of 15 seconds...so do a search on YouTube and you'll save yourself the pain of watching that horrible, HORRIBLE movie.
In other boring news about my life, Kraig and I spent 2 hours this weekend trying to replace our thermostat with a nifty new one because our old mercury one was pretty ugly...and...well needless to say we now have a big chunk of the wall with a different paint color and a thermostat that doesn't work hanging from the wall by the cords. Sure hope it doesn't get crazy cold or crazy hot anytime soon or else we're screwed. Hey Honeywell: maybe your retarded website could have information on replacing crazy old models, maybe you could surf the web and realize that every message board on thermostats also say that your site sucks for replacement info, maybe you could start printing model numbers on ink that doesn't FADE so that in the future people don't have to go blind trying to read wtf the numbers are, maybe you could tell your moron webmaster that the search engine doesn't work and keeps returning errors...
"By the power of grey skull...damn you Honeywell! Damn you and He-Man all to hell!"
I haven't seen this movie, but I have seen pix and lil video clips of Jessica Simpson which makes me almost wanna get it. There are better movies out there right now, so I think that I'll pass.
Yep, there are WAYYYYYYYYY better movies out there. And all of those pix/videos that you've seen are pretty much 99% of what you'd want to see anyway. She's barely in the movie, and when she is (other than the stuff you've seen), she's trying to look "tough" by fixing some plumbing (and no, you don't see any cleave or a$$)...I figured at the very least watching her half naked would be good inspiration to work out, but even that infamous bikini scene (when she walks in the police station) was all of 15 seconds...so do a search on YouTube and you'll save yourself the pain of watching that horrible, HORRIBLE movie.
In other boring news about my life, Kraig and I spent 2 hours this weekend trying to replace our thermostat with a nifty new one because our old mercury one was pretty ugly...and...well needless to say we now have a big chunk of the wall with a different paint color and a thermostat that doesn't work hanging from the wall by the cords. Sure hope it doesn't get crazy cold or crazy hot anytime soon or else we're screwed. Hey Honeywell: maybe your retarded website could have information on replacing crazy old models, maybe you could surf the web and realize that every message board on thermostats also say that your site sucks for replacement info, maybe you could start printing model numbers on ink that doesn't FADE so that in the future people don't have to go blind trying to read wtf the numbers are, maybe you could tell your moron webmaster that the search engine doesn't work and keeps returning errors...
"By the power of grey skull...damn you Honeywell! Damn you and He-Man all to hell!"
If your monkey arrived in the box dead....
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Monday, April 23, 2007
Movie Review: Dukes of Hazzard
Uhhh...movie review...so far, sadly, Jessica Simpson is probably the best actor in this movie. Minus the friend with no pants who blows up the safe, he plays a smart-but-hillbilly pretty well.
Only watching this 'cause I don't have anything else recorded.
I know i'm supposed to root for the Dukes even though they make illegal moonshine for a living....but I really WANT the crap beaten out of them and if that's a legit excuse for it, fine by me...At least Jessica Simpson has a job as a waitress....
Yep. I'm on the Police's side for this movie...you can't go wrong, the main police chief is the Other from Lost who boned Juliet. Don't mess with The Others. Even if they show up in Hazzard county.
Only watching this 'cause I don't have anything else recorded.
I know i'm supposed to root for the Dukes even though they make illegal moonshine for a living....but I really WANT the crap beaten out of them and if that's a legit excuse for it, fine by me...At least Jessica Simpson has a job as a waitress....
Yep. I'm on the Police's side for this movie...you can't go wrong, the main police chief is the Other from Lost who boned Juliet. Don't mess with The Others. Even if they show up in Hazzard county.
I hate neighbors. They blow goats.
One of the reasons I wanted to buy a house was 'cause I had this rationale that I didn't want to have a kid down the road and deal with neighbors above, below, and on either side of me making a ton of noise keeping my kid up. I didn't want to climb up stairs, or deal with crappy parking, and random retardedness that comes with renting.
Well...most of that was right. Except the noisy neighbor part. Thanks to the wonderfully overpriced world of Orange County, we got a condo...aka townhouse...thankfully we're an end unit so its just one shared wall....
Which you'd think wouldn't be so bad...
If I wasnt' next door to a dude who looks like a pedophile. I'm sure one day this will bite me in the ass and he'll stumble across this blog, but something tells me those odds are remote. Especially since he never remembers my name anyway.
He's super creepy. With a southern drawl. He's got this crazy loud motorcycle, a huge ass SUV, and like 10 toilets in his garage.
He's got a frickin' jungle in his little backyard...which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't connected with just a wall separating us...he's got one tree that's pretty much growing into MY backyard, and i'd hack it down if I had a ladder and a saw...and i refuse to buy a ladder and a saw just to deal with it based on principle...
He also smacked into Kraig's car, and didn't say anything until our other neighbors told him they saw that he's the one who backed into him. So now things are especially awkward (exchanging hundreds of dollars between neighbors always creates awkwardness)...
But all of that STILL wouldn't be so bad...if he just didn't work such dumbass hours so that he can stay up ALL night listening to his really, REALLY bad jazz/rock music. And what with one shared wall, needless to say, this irritates the crap out of me.
Right now, I have my tv on super loud to countereffect HIS loud tv. Sometimes he falls asleep with a DVD on loop...you know on a DVD how the main menu is like 20 seconds long and then loops around? Yeah...that's what I gotta hear when I try to go to sleep. Actually I think right now he's listening to music. I don't know. It's loud, annoying, and I don't see how I have a half million dollar house but STILL have to be subjected to thin walls and the sound of my neighbor picking up his phone.
Now...you'd think I could knock on his door and tell him to shut the eff up right? Wrong. Because he's got a middle unit, there's no actual front door. You either get in through the garage or through the back gate, but he keeps it locked. One time I tried to throw little rocks at his window to get him to look out, but that didn't help (plus I got scared that I would break a window or something).
Anyway, that's my bitching.
Well...most of that was right. Except the noisy neighbor part. Thanks to the wonderfully overpriced world of Orange County, we got a condo...aka townhouse...thankfully we're an end unit so its just one shared wall....
Which you'd think wouldn't be so bad...
If I wasnt' next door to a dude who looks like a pedophile. I'm sure one day this will bite me in the ass and he'll stumble across this blog, but something tells me those odds are remote. Especially since he never remembers my name anyway.
He's super creepy. With a southern drawl. He's got this crazy loud motorcycle, a huge ass SUV, and like 10 toilets in his garage.
He's got a frickin' jungle in his little backyard...which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't connected with just a wall separating us...he's got one tree that's pretty much growing into MY backyard, and i'd hack it down if I had a ladder and a saw...and i refuse to buy a ladder and a saw just to deal with it based on principle...
He also smacked into Kraig's car, and didn't say anything until our other neighbors told him they saw that he's the one who backed into him. So now things are especially awkward (exchanging hundreds of dollars between neighbors always creates awkwardness)...
But all of that STILL wouldn't be so bad...if he just didn't work such dumbass hours so that he can stay up ALL night listening to his really, REALLY bad jazz/rock music. And what with one shared wall, needless to say, this irritates the crap out of me.
Right now, I have my tv on super loud to countereffect HIS loud tv. Sometimes he falls asleep with a DVD on loop...you know on a DVD how the main menu is like 20 seconds long and then loops around? Yeah...that's what I gotta hear when I try to go to sleep. Actually I think right now he's listening to music. I don't know. It's loud, annoying, and I don't see how I have a half million dollar house but STILL have to be subjected to thin walls and the sound of my neighbor picking up his phone.
Now...you'd think I could knock on his door and tell him to shut the eff up right? Wrong. Because he's got a middle unit, there's no actual front door. You either get in through the garage or through the back gate, but he keeps it locked. One time I tried to throw little rocks at his window to get him to look out, but that didn't help (plus I got scared that I would break a window or something).
Anyway, that's my bitching.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Life is as interesting as a piece of lard
Okay so I haven't written jack. I've tried to think about stuff to bitch and gripe about, or comment on (come ON...I Love New York should be enough right?), but the sheer act of thinking and writing at the same time makes me tired.
In other words...my life pretty much revolves around going to work, running one errand after work (today's errand: going to target to pick up birthday decor to decorate an unsuspecting coworker's cube), then going home and sitting my ass down in front of the tv.
What's even MORE sad is that I bittorrented a bunch of south park episodes (which i can watch over and over till the cows come home) so I can watch them on my cell phone while working out, but somehow that's not even enough to drag my ass off the couch to go to the gym and...watch more tv.
Sad. Very sad.
I don't even LIKE Mythbusters but I'm too lazy to get off the couch to NOT watch. (Can you really split a boat in half if you drive super fast and smash into a pole? Apparently you gotta turn it last minute. And if you have a truck full of birds, and the birds start to fly, does that make the truck lighter?)
Sad. Very sad.
In other random boring news, I took Friday off work 'cause I gotta get fingerprinted for my US citizenship. GOod times. I also have my botox appointment, which at this point I'm thinking about putting the money towards something educational...since my ass sits in front of the tv anyway, maybe my MIND should be getting pumped, not my face.
In case anyone cares, in preliminary tests, the truck with birds doesn't change weight when the birds fly.
In other words...my life pretty much revolves around going to work, running one errand after work (today's errand: going to target to pick up birthday decor to decorate an unsuspecting coworker's cube), then going home and sitting my ass down in front of the tv.
What's even MORE sad is that I bittorrented a bunch of south park episodes (which i can watch over and over till the cows come home) so I can watch them on my cell phone while working out, but somehow that's not even enough to drag my ass off the couch to go to the gym and...watch more tv.
Sad. Very sad.
I don't even LIKE Mythbusters but I'm too lazy to get off the couch to NOT watch. (Can you really split a boat in half if you drive super fast and smash into a pole? Apparently you gotta turn it last minute. And if you have a truck full of birds, and the birds start to fly, does that make the truck lighter?)
Sad. Very sad.
In other random boring news, I took Friday off work 'cause I gotta get fingerprinted for my US citizenship. GOod times. I also have my botox appointment, which at this point I'm thinking about putting the money towards something educational...since my ass sits in front of the tv anyway, maybe my MIND should be getting pumped, not my face.
In case anyone cares, in preliminary tests, the truck with birds doesn't change weight when the birds fly.
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