This cracked me up:
agreed about the number of times thing. uh one come equals one come.
Exactly. You can't start...stop....start...stop...and then call that a few times. # times of sex is equal to the number of times the dude came.
The ONLY time it can be bypassed is if you're already on like round 4 and you know the dude is tapped dry and he's been pounding away for an hour.
Dang i needed a good laugh today. That hit the spot.
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Monday, January 23, 2006
10 Things
Yes yes i know i was a biotch to my mom, I apologized...i don't want everyone to rip me a new one...
From Esquire, 10 Things You Don't Know About Women (by Sanaa Lathan):
1. Guys, stop dousing yourselves with fragrance. If a man is swimming in cologne, chances are he's drowing out all of his better qualities.
2. Men who wear sunglasses at night don't look cool, rich, or sexy. They look as they should be holding a cane or following a dog.
SOOO true. I don't care if it's day or night. I can't STAND it when guys wear sunglasses indoors. What, fluorescent lighting is too much for you? Give me a frickin' break.
3. I know it's 2006, and believe me when I say that a woman can more than stando n her own. Nevertheless, we still love it when, every so often, yout ake control. Without stepping on our toes.
Once again, SOOOO true. Maybe I'm old skool. I don't know. It's just fantastic when a guy takes charge of things...whether it's the bills or figuring out what 's going on for dinner. Make a decision, and let's go for it. End of discussion.
4. Don't go runningi n fear or in search of the fire extinguisher every time we start crying. Sometimes tears are a good thing. Stick around for the end result.
So, so true...everyone thinks out loud, sometimes when we do that we end up crying...it's not a BAD thing...it's just we gotta let stuff out in the form of liquid from our eyes....but it's all good after that.
5. We do have a sixth sense. Women, like Santa Claus, know when you've been bad or good. So you know what to do...for goodness' sake.
Like i've said before....regardless if there's evidence...if you get that butterfly nauseous feeling in your stomach....go with it. Because you're probably right.
6. Women can stomach more than you think. We've seen Scarface and all 3 Godfathers just as many times as you have. And our Tony Montana impressionjust might be better than yours, even if we don't do it as often.
Well actually I don't know about that. It's not that they're not great movies...they're just...old. And for the most part, odds are, i'm gonna watch one of my rentals from netflix. And yeah i LOVE Clueless and Running Man, but those are obscure and I woudln't expect anyone else to see them.
Here's the thing with the Godfather movies...
I've seen the INTRO to all of them...but...last time I had a chance to see them my ex bf wanted to do a marathon Godfather session...well i promptly fell asleep after the beginning of the first one...and only woke up when he'd get up to change the DVD (VHS at the time? Probably)...and then I'd fall right back asleep. I'm a disgrace to womankind.
7. Our favorite foreplay technique? Mental stimulation. The kind where we're mentally tickled to the point of laughter.
Uh yeah I don't know about that last one, but kinda...yeah. Basically....make us "dig" you mentally...whether by humor or otherwise....through the grey matter...and we'll be putty in the hand.
8. Contrary to popular belief, longer in bed is not necessarily better. I'm not talking about size here fellas (more on that later); i'm talking about duration. Let's just say that if you're pushing an hour (no pun intended) we'll be likely to be stifling a yawn.
OH SO TRUE! Every chick will agree....10 mins of mind blowing action is better than an hour of random pumping...and for the most part, after an hour, it's hard to make it mind blowing so don't flatter yourself into thinking that you're THAT good if you're going for hours...
9. Size doesn't matter that much. Big can be less pleasurable than average. But no pinkies. (Think about the fingers on your hands).
true dat....
10. When doubt has crept in and we're driving you to insanity, remember this: According to the Bible, "Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing"
What if you find someone ELSE'S wife?
From Esquire, 10 Things You Don't Know About Women (by Sanaa Lathan):
1. Guys, stop dousing yourselves with fragrance. If a man is swimming in cologne, chances are he's drowing out all of his better qualities.
2. Men who wear sunglasses at night don't look cool, rich, or sexy. They look as they should be holding a cane or following a dog.
SOOO true. I don't care if it's day or night. I can't STAND it when guys wear sunglasses indoors. What, fluorescent lighting is too much for you? Give me a frickin' break.
3. I know it's 2006, and believe me when I say that a woman can more than stando n her own. Nevertheless, we still love it when, every so often, yout ake control. Without stepping on our toes.
Once again, SOOOO true. Maybe I'm old skool. I don't know. It's just fantastic when a guy takes charge of things...whether it's the bills or figuring out what 's going on for dinner. Make a decision, and let's go for it. End of discussion.
4. Don't go runningi n fear or in search of the fire extinguisher every time we start crying. Sometimes tears are a good thing. Stick around for the end result.
So, so true...everyone thinks out loud, sometimes when we do that we end up crying...it's not a BAD thing...it's just we gotta let stuff out in the form of liquid from our eyes....but it's all good after that.
5. We do have a sixth sense. Women, like Santa Claus, know when you've been bad or good. So you know what to do...for goodness' sake.
Like i've said before....regardless if there's evidence...if you get that butterfly nauseous feeling in your stomach....go with it. Because you're probably right.
6. Women can stomach more than you think. We've seen Scarface and all 3 Godfathers just as many times as you have. And our Tony Montana impressionjust might be better than yours, even if we don't do it as often.
Well actually I don't know about that. It's not that they're not great movies...they're just...old. And for the most part, odds are, i'm gonna watch one of my rentals from netflix. And yeah i LOVE Clueless and Running Man, but those are obscure and I woudln't expect anyone else to see them.
Here's the thing with the Godfather movies...
I've seen the INTRO to all of them...but...last time I had a chance to see them my ex bf wanted to do a marathon Godfather session...well i promptly fell asleep after the beginning of the first one...and only woke up when he'd get up to change the DVD (VHS at the time? Probably)...and then I'd fall right back asleep. I'm a disgrace to womankind.
7. Our favorite foreplay technique? Mental stimulation. The kind where we're mentally tickled to the point of laughter.
Uh yeah I don't know about that last one, but kinda...yeah. Basically....make us "dig" you mentally...whether by humor or otherwise....through the grey matter...and we'll be putty in the hand.
8. Contrary to popular belief, longer in bed is not necessarily better. I'm not talking about size here fellas (more on that later); i'm talking about duration. Let's just say that if you're pushing an hour (no pun intended) we'll be likely to be stifling a yawn.
OH SO TRUE! Every chick will agree....10 mins of mind blowing action is better than an hour of random pumping...and for the most part, after an hour, it's hard to make it mind blowing so don't flatter yourself into thinking that you're THAT good if you're going for hours...
9. Size doesn't matter that much. Big can be less pleasurable than average. But no pinkies. (Think about the fingers on your hands).
true dat....
10. When doubt has crept in and we're driving you to insanity, remember this: According to the Bible, "Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing"
What if you find someone ELSE'S wife?
Sunday, January 22, 2006
Yes yes I know....
Yes
I know
I was a biotch to my mom
I'll apologize to her...I was just having a MASSIVE bad week last week and I wasn't in the mood to deal with the thought of visiting my sister in law and having her dismiss me yet again like she did last time, have her flat out insult my parents like that, and see my parents get upset...they have too much faith that things will get better.
On another note, don't think that I've forgotten about that gorgeous GORGEOUS gorgeous bracelet. I'm supposed to come into some money in November...I can't post the reason why on the blog but between now and November is going to be pure hell. And I was going to put that money towards property taxes (if I don't have it all saved up by then), however now I'm thinking I frickin' should splurge and take half of it and get the bracelet. It's STUNNING. My wrist isn't even worthy of it.
Okay so we all know that I would never do something as "fun" as take a huge chunk of cash and buy something as frivolous as jewelry...but a girl can dream, right?
The song of the day is No Diggity by Blackstreet
I like the way you work it
Trumped tight, all day, every day
You're blowing my mind, maybe in time
Baby, I can get you in my ride
One guy I dated loooved that song and said that was "our" song...umm yeah not my first choice for an "our" song considering it's by Blackstreet and he was an uber white french catholic kid who drove his mom's Tercel....
One last thought...
I'm sure the picture links are eventually gonna not work, so if there's no image...well...suck it. I'm too lazy to find ones from sites that can handle lots of bandwidth or linking.
You know when people tell you that you remind them of a celebrity...In my life I've been told that I remind people of:
Sophia Coppola
Blossom chick
Eva Longoria
Only because of how my hair looked once Henry cut it last year
And now add to the list:
That Pussycat Dolls Chick
Well at least the references aren't getting uglier and uglier...
Personally, I thought I always looked like Seinfeld's ex gf, Shoshanna Lonstein (just umm...without those MASSIVE boobs)...'cause we both have big noses...
I know
I was a biotch to my mom
I'll apologize to her...I was just having a MASSIVE bad week last week and I wasn't in the mood to deal with the thought of visiting my sister in law and having her dismiss me yet again like she did last time, have her flat out insult my parents like that, and see my parents get upset...they have too much faith that things will get better.
On another note, don't think that I've forgotten about that gorgeous GORGEOUS gorgeous bracelet. I'm supposed to come into some money in November...I can't post the reason why on the blog but between now and November is going to be pure hell. And I was going to put that money towards property taxes (if I don't have it all saved up by then), however now I'm thinking I frickin' should splurge and take half of it and get the bracelet. It's STUNNING. My wrist isn't even worthy of it.
Okay so we all know that I would never do something as "fun" as take a huge chunk of cash and buy something as frivolous as jewelry...but a girl can dream, right?
The song of the day is No Diggity by Blackstreet
I like the way you work it
Trumped tight, all day, every day
You're blowing my mind, maybe in time
Baby, I can get you in my ride
One guy I dated loooved that song and said that was "our" song...umm yeah not my first choice for an "our" song considering it's by Blackstreet and he was an uber white french catholic kid who drove his mom's Tercel....
One last thought...
I'm sure the picture links are eventually gonna not work, so if there's no image...well...suck it. I'm too lazy to find ones from sites that can handle lots of bandwidth or linking.
You know when people tell you that you remind them of a celebrity...In my life I've been told that I remind people of:
Sophia Coppola
Blossom chick
Eva Longoria
Only because of how my hair looked once Henry cut it last year
And now add to the list:
That Pussycat Dolls Chick
Well at least the references aren't getting uglier and uglier...
Personally, I thought I always looked like Seinfeld's ex gf, Shoshanna Lonstein (just umm...without those MASSIVE boobs)...'cause we both have big noses...
Saturday, January 21, 2006
DVD Review: The Notebook
Title: The Notebook
Starring: Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams
Subtitle: That movie that made every teenage girl cry in hopes of true love and made every teenage boyfriend want to beat himself with a pitchfork.
Review:
This movie...
is...
JACKED UP.
Don't get me started on the bad editing.
The ending is just effed up. I mean, seriously...jacked up.
And what is up with Rachel McAdams having a southern accent one minute, a California (okay, she's Canadian, same diff) accent the next?
Guys, if you're forced to watch this movie with your woman, skip all the DVD extras except for the "alternative lovemaking scene"...the scene that made it into the movie was short and sweet. The scene they cut out? Total soft porn.
Which leads me to think that if I had the right editing software, I could put together a FABULOUS montage of all the girl reaching orgasm scenes...starting with When Harry Met Sally, plus The Notebook, plus the part where that dude goes down on Tara Reid in American Pie...someone's gotta do something proactive for womankind.
Starring: Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams
Subtitle: That movie that made every teenage girl cry in hopes of true love and made every teenage boyfriend want to beat himself with a pitchfork.
Review:
This movie...
is...
JACKED UP.
Don't get me started on the bad editing.
The ending is just effed up. I mean, seriously...jacked up.
And what is up with Rachel McAdams having a southern accent one minute, a California (okay, she's Canadian, same diff) accent the next?
Guys, if you're forced to watch this movie with your woman, skip all the DVD extras except for the "alternative lovemaking scene"...the scene that made it into the movie was short and sweet. The scene they cut out? Total soft porn.
Which leads me to think that if I had the right editing software, I could put together a FABULOUS montage of all the girl reaching orgasm scenes...starting with When Harry Met Sally, plus The Notebook, plus the part where that dude goes down on Tara Reid in American Pie...someone's gotta do something proactive for womankind.
Friday, January 20, 2006
IM with my mom....
I was in a bad, bad frickin' mood this week...
My_mom: r u there knock knock?
ME: i'm here
My_mom: whats up
My_mom: +18 in l.a. nice
My_mom: are u wearing a jacket these days?
ME: sometimes
My_mom: how is marma doing these days?
My_mom: stashy pooh still a bad boy? r they still fighting?
ME: they're doing fine
My_mom: any booboo by marma again?
My_mom: miss her, wish i could hug her
ME: no she's been good
My_mom: whats new
My_mom: how is kraig doing?
My_mom: busy with his new game?
ME: yup. everyone's fine
My_mom: good
My_mom: what are u doing this weekend?
My_mom: r u still going to that bagel place?
ME: sometimes
My_mom: did u manage to tidy up the spare bedroom yet?
ME: i'm working on it
My_mom: i might be coming middle of march to visit tarik, dad will come down too at some point, he still has a return ticket from san jose to ottawa, because last year his work sent him to victoria
My_mom: have u got room for us for a few days?
ME: realistically....probably not...not by March that's for sure. There's just nowhere to put all the stuff that's in the spare bedroom.
ME: i mean, i'll be more than fine paying for a hotel or something, i'm just saying that our place doesn't have room for people to stay overnight unless it's just one person on the couch
My_mom: i told u i would sort out your magazines and nicely put them into boxes for u, last year, i had so much time, all i did was sit around
My_mom: it wouldnt look good if we dont see u as well
ME: They ARE In boxes, and i did throw out a whole bunch. All my magazines are packed up.
My_mom: unless and kraig come up to tarik
My_mom: u and kraig i ment
ME: I'm not saying we won't see you, dont' you read what i write?!! I said that you just can't spend the night, i'm fine with paying for a hotel for you guys, there's just no place to SLEEP.
My_mom: i read what u said, and we can pay ourselves for a hotel
My_mom: but it looks kind of strange parents have to stay in a hotel
My_mom: can u come up to tariks?
ME: That's NOT strange, i hate to burst your bubble but PLENTY of people do it, especially when their kids live in small places with no room.
My_mom: well u do have room, just that u still have to sort yourself out
My_mom: i was hoping we could stay with u people, sit on your patio, walk around a bit there to give dad a better idea of your surrounding and your home
ME: That's what i said, i said that by march there won't be room.
My_mom: can u and kraig come up to tariks?
ME: it depends when
ME: and i don't think ((sis in law)) would like us staying there, so where would we sleep.
My_mom: with tarik of course
My_mom: would be a good start with ((sis in law)) and all of u
My_mom: thought of coming to tarik middle of march or end of march
ME: ok
My_mom: i will stay 4 weeks or so, i will come down first, dad will follow sometimes inbtw
ME: ok
My_mom: he will stay about 2 weeks
My_mom: thats when i thought to come down over the weekend, i was hoping u have sorted out your bedroom by then
ME: There's nowhere for now to put the things that i have in there.
My_mom: k
ME: but like i said, i have no problems payi ng for a hotel or something so that you guys can come visit
My_mom: where is the nearest hotel?
ME: they're everywhere
My_mom: the idea is to visit u, your home etc., i talk to dad, but maybe we scrap the idea coming down this time and u come up with kraig
My_mom: instead
My_mom: i mean tarik has room
My_mom: i guess smaller the home, the more one has to make space work for u
ME: ok
My_mom: and ((sis in law)) just has to get used to it, i want my family to come together, when we come down for a visit, its not often
ME: ok
My_mom: once a year we can all grin and bare it
ME: ok
My_mom: for now plans are just forming, but its time to start
My_mom: thinking about it
ME: ok
My_mom: pitty i cant hug marma then sigh
My_mom: how much is a hotel room?
My_mom: cheap is good enough for us, we are cheap
My_mom: hehe
ME: i dont' know, i've never had to book a hotel room near my house.
My_mom: dads laptop sucks, but how can i complain, free internet
ME: free is good
My_mom: there are no hotels in walking distance?
ME: um no, i would never buy a house that's near a hotel. is there a hotel in walking distance of yuor house?!
My_mom: no hehe
My_mom: but near other houses there is
My_mom: dont think there's a hotel in orleans
My_mom: the are all around st. laurent, montreal road
My_mom: find out about how much a room would cost
My_mom: i was hoping so much that dad could see your home
My_mom: still maybe this time to have u and kraig come up over a weekend when dad is here, would be a good idea
My_mom: anyway, c u
ME: bye
My_mom: r u there knock knock?
ME: i'm here
My_mom: whats up
My_mom: +18 in l.a. nice
My_mom: are u wearing a jacket these days?
ME: sometimes
My_mom: how is marma doing these days?
My_mom: stashy pooh still a bad boy? r they still fighting?
ME: they're doing fine
My_mom: any booboo by marma again?
My_mom: miss her, wish i could hug her
ME: no she's been good
My_mom: whats new
My_mom: how is kraig doing?
My_mom: busy with his new game?
ME: yup. everyone's fine
My_mom: good
My_mom: what are u doing this weekend?
My_mom: r u still going to that bagel place?
ME: sometimes
My_mom: did u manage to tidy up the spare bedroom yet?
ME: i'm working on it
My_mom: i might be coming middle of march to visit tarik, dad will come down too at some point, he still has a return ticket from san jose to ottawa, because last year his work sent him to victoria
My_mom: have u got room for us for a few days?
ME: realistically....probably not...not by March that's for sure. There's just nowhere to put all the stuff that's in the spare bedroom.
ME: i mean, i'll be more than fine paying for a hotel or something, i'm just saying that our place doesn't have room for people to stay overnight unless it's just one person on the couch
My_mom: i told u i would sort out your magazines and nicely put them into boxes for u, last year, i had so much time, all i did was sit around
My_mom: it wouldnt look good if we dont see u as well
ME: They ARE In boxes, and i did throw out a whole bunch. All my magazines are packed up.
My_mom: unless and kraig come up to tarik
My_mom: u and kraig i ment
ME: I'm not saying we won't see you, dont' you read what i write?!! I said that you just can't spend the night, i'm fine with paying for a hotel for you guys, there's just no place to SLEEP.
My_mom: i read what u said, and we can pay ourselves for a hotel
My_mom: but it looks kind of strange parents have to stay in a hotel
My_mom: can u come up to tariks?
ME: That's NOT strange, i hate to burst your bubble but PLENTY of people do it, especially when their kids live in small places with no room.
My_mom: well u do have room, just that u still have to sort yourself out
My_mom: i was hoping we could stay with u people, sit on your patio, walk around a bit there to give dad a better idea of your surrounding and your home
ME: That's what i said, i said that by march there won't be room.
My_mom: can u and kraig come up to tariks?
ME: it depends when
ME: and i don't think ((sis in law)) would like us staying there, so where would we sleep.
My_mom: with tarik of course
My_mom: would be a good start with ((sis in law)) and all of u
My_mom: thought of coming to tarik middle of march or end of march
ME: ok
My_mom: i will stay 4 weeks or so, i will come down first, dad will follow sometimes inbtw
ME: ok
My_mom: he will stay about 2 weeks
My_mom: thats when i thought to come down over the weekend, i was hoping u have sorted out your bedroom by then
ME: There's nowhere for now to put the things that i have in there.
My_mom: k
ME: but like i said, i have no problems payi ng for a hotel or something so that you guys can come visit
My_mom: where is the nearest hotel?
ME: they're everywhere
My_mom: the idea is to visit u, your home etc., i talk to dad, but maybe we scrap the idea coming down this time and u come up with kraig
My_mom: instead
My_mom: i mean tarik has room
My_mom: i guess smaller the home, the more one has to make space work for u
ME: ok
My_mom: and ((sis in law)) just has to get used to it, i want my family to come together, when we come down for a visit, its not often
ME: ok
My_mom: once a year we can all grin and bare it
ME: ok
My_mom: for now plans are just forming, but its time to start
My_mom: thinking about it
ME: ok
My_mom: pitty i cant hug marma then sigh
My_mom: how much is a hotel room?
My_mom: cheap is good enough for us, we are cheap
My_mom: hehe
ME: i dont' know, i've never had to book a hotel room near my house.
My_mom: dads laptop sucks, but how can i complain, free internet
ME: free is good
My_mom: there are no hotels in walking distance?
ME: um no, i would never buy a house that's near a hotel. is there a hotel in walking distance of yuor house?!
My_mom: no hehe
My_mom: but near other houses there is
My_mom: dont think there's a hotel in orleans
My_mom: the are all around st. laurent, montreal road
My_mom: find out about how much a room would cost
My_mom: i was hoping so much that dad could see your home
My_mom: still maybe this time to have u and kraig come up over a weekend when dad is here, would be a good idea
My_mom: anyway, c u
ME: bye
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Ugh killing time
Yeah killing time. So bored right now. Suck it.
Q: WHOSE BED DID YOU SLEEP IN LAST NIGHT?
A: Mine.
Q: WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
A: Cream-colored sweater with baby blue/black print on sleeves
Q: WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR UNDIES RIGHT NOW?
A: baby blue
Q: DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?
A: two cats and a husband (ha ha...okay nm)
Q: MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED?
A: effing Brokeback....
Q: NAME 3 THINGS THAT YOU HAVE WITH YOU AT ALL TIMES?
A: Lipsmackers...keys...cell phone
Q: WHAT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEETS?
A: i think the blue ones are on right now
Q: HOW MUCH CASH DO YOU HAVE ON YOU RIGHT NOW?
A: i think i've got a few bucks in my wallet
Q: WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT?
A: sleeping
Q: WHATS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF THE CHICKEN?
A: the thigh baby. the thigh.
Q: WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE TOWN/CITY?
A: i dunno...i miss downtown Ottawa in the summer...Monteal's kinda cool...no idea.
Q: HOW DID YOUR LAST RELATIONSHIP END?
A: define relationship...actual "boyfriend/girlfriend" status? it ended on the phone with both of us pretty bitter.
Q: I CAN'T WAIT TO?
A: go to Adam's house to watch the OC
Q: WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR DAD?
A: August 2005
Q: Who got you to join MySpace?
A: i have no idea...Nicole T? Marlene and Marcella were on it early on....hmm...
Q: Is Tom on your friends list?
A: No but i get his stupid updates
Q: What's the last thing you said out loud?
A: "See ya woman!"
Q: Look to your left. What's there?
A: A tube of hand lotion on my desk with ALOT of papers.
Q: What is the last thing/person you spent over $100?
A: I sent Nic some dough (back dues on my gym membership!)
Q: Who's your favorite villain?
A: Malificent
Q: Whats the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
A: Thermal underwear from Nic D for skiing along with Trish's ski jacket/pants
Q: What web site(s) do you visit the most during the day?
A: http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/
animal rescue site
Early Edition
craigslist
And then the usual news, bank accounts, etc....
Q: If you could drink anything right now what would it be?
A: Water...i'm thirsty.
Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
A: my back
Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
A: crap....i think the last time i took a cab was way back when trish had that girls' night out...that doesn't sound right though.
Q: Do you own a picture phone?
A: how very british of you....yes.
Q: What's your favorite Starbucks drink?
A: Tazo Passion Tea
Q: What were your New Years resolutions?
A: we all know what they were.
Q: Admit something about yourself.
A: No matter what i look like on the outside, my brain is always working in overdrive processing, overthinking, re-hashing, tabulating, and remembering everything and anything.
Q: WHOSE BED DID YOU SLEEP IN LAST NIGHT?
A: Mine.
Q: WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
A: Cream-colored sweater with baby blue/black print on sleeves
Q: WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR UNDIES RIGHT NOW?
A: baby blue
Q: DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?
A: two cats and a husband (ha ha...okay nm)
Q: MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED?
A: effing Brokeback....
Q: NAME 3 THINGS THAT YOU HAVE WITH YOU AT ALL TIMES?
A: Lipsmackers...keys...cell phone
Q: WHAT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEETS?
A: i think the blue ones are on right now
Q: HOW MUCH CASH DO YOU HAVE ON YOU RIGHT NOW?
A: i think i've got a few bucks in my wallet
Q: WHAT WERE YOU DOING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT?
A: sleeping
Q: WHATS YOUR FAVORITE PART OF THE CHICKEN?
A: the thigh baby. the thigh.
Q: WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE TOWN/CITY?
A: i dunno...i miss downtown Ottawa in the summer...Monteal's kinda cool...no idea.
Q: HOW DID YOUR LAST RELATIONSHIP END?
A: define relationship...actual "boyfriend/girlfriend" status? it ended on the phone with both of us pretty bitter.
Q: I CAN'T WAIT TO?
A: go to Adam's house to watch the OC
Q: WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAW YOUR DAD?
A: August 2005
Q: Who got you to join MySpace?
A: i have no idea...Nicole T? Marlene and Marcella were on it early on....hmm...
Q: Is Tom on your friends list?
A: No but i get his stupid updates
Q: What's the last thing you said out loud?
A: "See ya woman!"
Q: Look to your left. What's there?
A: A tube of hand lotion on my desk with ALOT of papers.
Q: What is the last thing/person you spent over $100?
A: I sent Nic some dough (back dues on my gym membership!)
Q: Who's your favorite villain?
A: Malificent
Q: Whats the last piece of clothing you borrowed from someone?
A: Thermal underwear from Nic D for skiing along with Trish's ski jacket/pants
Q: What web site(s) do you visit the most during the day?
A: http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/
animal rescue site
Early Edition
craigslist
And then the usual news, bank accounts, etc....
Q: If you could drink anything right now what would it be?
A: Water...i'm thirsty.
Q: Does anything hurt on your body right now?
A: my back
Q: What city was your last taxi cab ride in?
A: crap....i think the last time i took a cab was way back when trish had that girls' night out...that doesn't sound right though.
Q: Do you own a picture phone?
A: how very british of you....yes.
Q: What's your favorite Starbucks drink?
A: Tazo Passion Tea
Q: What were your New Years resolutions?
A: we all know what they were.
Q: Admit something about yourself.
A: No matter what i look like on the outside, my brain is always working in overdrive processing, overthinking, re-hashing, tabulating, and remembering everything and anything.
Nothing is more fabulous...
...than The OC.
Sounds like everything you need for a wild night. Go Taylor.
...a long night of candle wax, tube socks, and the new Fiona Apple CD
Sounds like everything you need for a wild night. Go Taylor.
Best video ever
The people who made this David Hasselhoff video must have been smoking the good stuff...it's worth it to watch the whole thing, it just gets worse and worse:
Hooked On A Feeling
Hooked On A Feeling
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
New expression
You saw it here folks...
New expression that was formed in a discussion after a Society for Technical Communications meeting in Carrie's car...
"...after he got all brokeback on his ass...."...
That's my expression for 2006...
Okay it's not elegant and refined, but it's worth it.
New expression that was formed in a discussion after a Society for Technical Communications meeting in Carrie's car...
"...after he got all brokeback on his ass...."...
That's my expression for 2006...
Okay it's not elegant and refined, but it's worth it.
Monday, January 16, 2006
I don't know how to quit you
I swear Carrie should be a comedian....
After an hour into Brokeback Mountain...and nothing but people herding sheep around (gasp, two herds of sheep merged? Whatever will they do?), Carrie whispers "They better get to the gay sex soon!"...
Not something I have ever heard in my entire life...still makes me laugh a day later...
After an hour into Brokeback Mountain...and nothing but people herding sheep around (gasp, two herds of sheep merged? Whatever will they do?), Carrie whispers "They better get to the gay sex soon!"...
Not something I have ever heard in my entire life...still makes me laugh a day later...
Friday, January 13, 2006
And I listen for the whisper of your sweet insanity
And i remember you dancing that night, all the light of the world in your eyes. And we thought it would never end, never end.
I'll get off my ass and post the source when I can find it...
I'll get off my ass and post the source when I can find it...
What I've Learned In 28 Years
geezus just re-read this hours later, holy typos batman
So the whole deal with life is that you make mistakes, you learn from them, you move on. Or hopefully the people around you will make the mistake and you can watch and learn from afar.
Here's my List of Things I've Learned In My 28 Years of Wisdom:
1. If you find yourself looking for work...and you get an offer (with more dough)...and then your current company begs you to stay by matching or offering a bit more cash than the other job...DON'T STAY. It's taken me a few times of this mistake, but if you were looking for another job (not for financial reasons) then throwing some more cash at the situation won't make you happier.
You're better off with the fear of the unknown potential unhappiness than the existing one, and don't let your ego get swayed by this ("ooohhh they like me enough to beg me to stay with more money!").
2. If you get some sort of sign-on or relocation bonus when you start a job, do NOT lock yourself into a long payback time. When i moved to California i got a good chunk of cash (which then got taxed 50%...d'oh!) but i had to stay for 1 year or pay it back.
Ohhh...that hurt.
Bad.
Because turns out, i hated that job, but I couldn't quit. At the 6-month mark, I bawled the entire way to work...I couldn't believe I was only at the halfway mark. Never, ever again. 3 months...sure....12 months...it better pay off a home mortgage to make it worth me suffering for another year.
3. When you're SO drunk that you're borderline ready to puke...DON'T drink water. Drink it WHILE you're getting drunk...drink it the morning after....but at the puking stage, water is bad bad bad.
4. Contrary to what we teenage girls think...a boy will adore you like mad UNTIL you give in and have sex with him. Having sex with him will NOT make him like you more. So while you think "oooohhh if i sleep with him, he'll like me!" it's more like "heck yeah I got this dog panting and I'm gonna keep him that way". Sure boyfriends stick around and all that...but the devotion and attention is SO much higher when you're NOT having sex with them.
(Does not apply once you hit your 20s).
5. A great pair of shoes IS worth the pain of breaking them in. Bonus points if they make your legs look fabulous.
6. Anyone who says money can't buy happiness is already rich and doesn't know wtf they're talking about.
Put it this way...
If i had money, then my basic needs are per Maslow are met (food, clothing, security)...so maybe i'm not HAPPY...but I'm not physically hurting from the elements or hunger.
If i didn't have money and i didn't have food, clothng, shelter...guaranteed i'm gonna be unhappy. Unless i'm sniffing empty chip bags that i found in the dumpster...that I call home.
7. You can be the hardest worker on the planet, but if no one knows it then you're useless in their eyes. Even more useless than the actual useless person who at least fakes it. Basically...regardless if you're a lazy slacker or keener-top-notch employee, all that matters is that you make sure people THINK you're valuable and hard working.
8. Don't trust a guy who says his car is in the shop (or whatever reason) and can't pick you up for your first date. Amazingly I've dated TONS of guys who didn't have cars and i had to pick them up. Most of them were in California. I think one of the reasons I fell for Kraig was because hea ctually showed up with his own effing car. It's fishy when a guy talks about his wheels but can't produce.
9. If you're dating/seeing a guy...and even though he hasn't done anything to break your trust and he's perfect in every other way...if you have that bad feeling in the pit of your stomach...where you get bad butterflies or nausea when you can't get a hold of him or he goes out for a night...ditch him. It's illogical, it's unfounded...but in my experience, 100% of the times I had those butterflies it turns out in the end I was right to be nervous.
10. The following things ARE worth paying extra for (most of the time):
- razors (mach3 baby!)
- a brand new hairstyle
- manicure/pedicure
- foundation
- sunblock
- jeans
- the perfect cocktail dress
- the perfect interview outfit
- hair straightener
- conditioner
- nylons
- laundry detergent (Woolite for Darks is a miracle)
- popcorn (my mom taught me that one, don't ask)
- home or renter's insurance (replacement policy, not cash value!)
- sunglasses (yeah argue with me. i don't care. my polarized ray bans are the only things i'm terrified about losing when i think of my car getting stolen)
- soda....Diet Pepsi is NOT the same as Shasta!!
and most importantly
- TAMPONS!!! Only ONCE in my life have I gone with the store-brand and I swear, it's amazing my gonads still function. How do you screw up a cardboard tube with fluffy white stuff? Heck, since that experience I've been pro-Tampax Pearl...i know it sounds like a sham but that one is SO much more comfy than the regular tampax, but either is better than generic. Your nooks and crannies deserve the best!
11. The following things you can totally get away by going cheap on:
- uber trendy shoes
- uber trendy anything
- quick hair trim
- lipgloss
- bottled water. I know, Aquafina isn't spring water...but eff it. Water is water. If you're thirsty and you've got a buck, don't feel bad 'cause you can't buy Evian...get the Deja Bleu. In 48 hours it won't make a diff anyway.
- anything for the beach. It's gonna get covered in sunblock, sand, dirt, weird green stuff.
- styling products. You can argue with me, but this is MY list...pomade is all the same in my books.
- liquid soap (okay but the stuff from Bath and Body works is pretyt nifty)
- gas....if your car is a regular joe shmoe car and the book SAYS you don't need the premium stuff...don't be an ass by filling your car with the expensive stuff.
- costume jewelry...the stuff i get complimented on the most comes from cheapie teenie stores like Forever21
- toothpaste. Avoid Aim if you can...but the uber expensive toothpastes always taste like ass. Go midgrade...anywhere from AquaFresh to Colgate Total.
12. Humans are capable of falling in love...numerous times. There's not a cap. Emotions don't have a limit to the number of times they can do something. This whole falling in love once for a lifetime thing was written by storybook authors...if you think you've lost the great love of your life...well...you'll be surprised when the next one comes along. Each love is different, that's all.
13. The great irony of obsessive compulsiveness is that it keeps those of us with bizarre routines somewhat sane. (okay i'm like a smidgen obsessive compulsive, but it's there!)
14. This one falls under the "geezus were you an idiot" category: don't keep sleeping with a guy who keeps talking about his ex-girlfriend the supermodel after sex. It's one thing to joke "yeah my last gf was a supermodel...but she was SO lazy...you were fantastic! no more models for me!"...it's another to ALWAYS talk about your super hot model ex gf for no apparent reason....
I don't care how horny you are...some creeps just aren't worth it.
15. Never ever EVER feel bad for buying yourself something that stereotypically a guy would buy. You probably have better taste than he would anyway.
A'ight, end babbling....
So the whole deal with life is that you make mistakes, you learn from them, you move on. Or hopefully the people around you will make the mistake and you can watch and learn from afar.
Here's my List of Things I've Learned In My 28 Years of Wisdom:
1. If you find yourself looking for work...and you get an offer (with more dough)...and then your current company begs you to stay by matching or offering a bit more cash than the other job...DON'T STAY. It's taken me a few times of this mistake, but if you were looking for another job (not for financial reasons) then throwing some more cash at the situation won't make you happier.
You're better off with the fear of the unknown potential unhappiness than the existing one, and don't let your ego get swayed by this ("ooohhh they like me enough to beg me to stay with more money!").
2. If you get some sort of sign-on or relocation bonus when you start a job, do NOT lock yourself into a long payback time. When i moved to California i got a good chunk of cash (which then got taxed 50%...d'oh!) but i had to stay for 1 year or pay it back.
Ohhh...that hurt.
Bad.
Because turns out, i hated that job, but I couldn't quit. At the 6-month mark, I bawled the entire way to work...I couldn't believe I was only at the halfway mark. Never, ever again. 3 months...sure....12 months...it better pay off a home mortgage to make it worth me suffering for another year.
3. When you're SO drunk that you're borderline ready to puke...DON'T drink water. Drink it WHILE you're getting drunk...drink it the morning after....but at the puking stage, water is bad bad bad.
4. Contrary to what we teenage girls think...a boy will adore you like mad UNTIL you give in and have sex with him. Having sex with him will NOT make him like you more. So while you think "oooohhh if i sleep with him, he'll like me!" it's more like "heck yeah I got this dog panting and I'm gonna keep him that way". Sure boyfriends stick around and all that...but the devotion and attention is SO much higher when you're NOT having sex with them.
(Does not apply once you hit your 20s).
5. A great pair of shoes IS worth the pain of breaking them in. Bonus points if they make your legs look fabulous.
6. Anyone who says money can't buy happiness is already rich and doesn't know wtf they're talking about.
Put it this way...
If i had money, then my basic needs are per Maslow are met (food, clothing, security)...so maybe i'm not HAPPY...but I'm not physically hurting from the elements or hunger.
If i didn't have money and i didn't have food, clothng, shelter...guaranteed i'm gonna be unhappy. Unless i'm sniffing empty chip bags that i found in the dumpster...that I call home.
7. You can be the hardest worker on the planet, but if no one knows it then you're useless in their eyes. Even more useless than the actual useless person who at least fakes it. Basically...regardless if you're a lazy slacker or keener-top-notch employee, all that matters is that you make sure people THINK you're valuable and hard working.
8. Don't trust a guy who says his car is in the shop (or whatever reason) and can't pick you up for your first date. Amazingly I've dated TONS of guys who didn't have cars and i had to pick them up. Most of them were in California. I think one of the reasons I fell for Kraig was because hea ctually showed up with his own effing car. It's fishy when a guy talks about his wheels but can't produce.
9. If you're dating/seeing a guy...and even though he hasn't done anything to break your trust and he's perfect in every other way...if you have that bad feeling in the pit of your stomach...where you get bad butterflies or nausea when you can't get a hold of him or he goes out for a night...ditch him. It's illogical, it's unfounded...but in my experience, 100% of the times I had those butterflies it turns out in the end I was right to be nervous.
10. The following things ARE worth paying extra for (most of the time):
- razors (mach3 baby!)
- a brand new hairstyle
- manicure/pedicure
- foundation
- sunblock
- jeans
- the perfect cocktail dress
- the perfect interview outfit
- hair straightener
- conditioner
- nylons
- laundry detergent (Woolite for Darks is a miracle)
- popcorn (my mom taught me that one, don't ask)
- home or renter's insurance (replacement policy, not cash value!)
- sunglasses (yeah argue with me. i don't care. my polarized ray bans are the only things i'm terrified about losing when i think of my car getting stolen)
- soda....Diet Pepsi is NOT the same as Shasta!!
and most importantly
- TAMPONS!!! Only ONCE in my life have I gone with the store-brand and I swear, it's amazing my gonads still function. How do you screw up a cardboard tube with fluffy white stuff? Heck, since that experience I've been pro-Tampax Pearl...i know it sounds like a sham but that one is SO much more comfy than the regular tampax, but either is better than generic. Your nooks and crannies deserve the best!
11. The following things you can totally get away by going cheap on:
- uber trendy shoes
- uber trendy anything
- quick hair trim
- lipgloss
- bottled water. I know, Aquafina isn't spring water...but eff it. Water is water. If you're thirsty and you've got a buck, don't feel bad 'cause you can't buy Evian...get the Deja Bleu. In 48 hours it won't make a diff anyway.
- anything for the beach. It's gonna get covered in sunblock, sand, dirt, weird green stuff.
- styling products. You can argue with me, but this is MY list...pomade is all the same in my books.
- liquid soap (okay but the stuff from Bath and Body works is pretyt nifty)
- gas....if your car is a regular joe shmoe car and the book SAYS you don't need the premium stuff...don't be an ass by filling your car with the expensive stuff.
- costume jewelry...the stuff i get complimented on the most comes from cheapie teenie stores like Forever21
- toothpaste. Avoid Aim if you can...but the uber expensive toothpastes always taste like ass. Go midgrade...anywhere from AquaFresh to Colgate Total.
12. Humans are capable of falling in love...numerous times. There's not a cap. Emotions don't have a limit to the number of times they can do something. This whole falling in love once for a lifetime thing was written by storybook authors...if you think you've lost the great love of your life...well...you'll be surprised when the next one comes along. Each love is different, that's all.
13. The great irony of obsessive compulsiveness is that it keeps those of us with bizarre routines somewhat sane. (okay i'm like a smidgen obsessive compulsive, but it's there!)
14. This one falls under the "geezus were you an idiot" category: don't keep sleeping with a guy who keeps talking about his ex-girlfriend the supermodel after sex. It's one thing to joke "yeah my last gf was a supermodel...but she was SO lazy...you were fantastic! no more models for me!"...it's another to ALWAYS talk about your super hot model ex gf for no apparent reason....
I don't care how horny you are...some creeps just aren't worth it.
15. Never ever EVER feel bad for buying yourself something that stereotypically a guy would buy. You probably have better taste than he would anyway.
A'ight, end babbling....
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
Why being a grownup sucks, part n+1
Tonight is my stupid pee test for the life insurance...and i'm not worried about me, i'm worried about Kraig...insuring him costs more anyway, so it's bad enough...
I want an In N Out burger so effing bad.
And how did Nicole lose all this weight for her disability medical test...i've gained 4lbs from all the oatmeal i've been consuming....
On a few CelebReality notes....
Flavor Of Love
I swear, I love Flava Flav! He gave some great advice to "Pumkin"...if someone doesn't pay your bills, isn't giving you a job, if they're opinion doesn't impact your welfare...THEIR OPINION DOESN'T MATTER. So very true, and so much better than most advice which is to not care what anyone thinks. 'Cause i don't care if my neighbor thinks i'm a crack whore, but I do care if my boss thinks that.
I love that they picked the absolute bottom-feeders of society to be on that show. Secretly, I'm rooting for Goldie.
Celebrity Fit Club
I love watching celebrities fall off their high horses. Especially when it's drug-related. And they claim it's Benadryl.
And I also love when they climb back up....go Young MC!
Dash dash dash....
Can i please please please have a weekend where I'm no longer a grownup?!?!?!?!
I want an In N Out burger so effing bad.
And how did Nicole lose all this weight for her disability medical test...i've gained 4lbs from all the oatmeal i've been consuming....
On a few CelebReality notes....
Flavor Of Love
I swear, I love Flava Flav! He gave some great advice to "Pumkin"...if someone doesn't pay your bills, isn't giving you a job, if they're opinion doesn't impact your welfare...THEIR OPINION DOESN'T MATTER. So very true, and so much better than most advice which is to not care what anyone thinks. 'Cause i don't care if my neighbor thinks i'm a crack whore, but I do care if my boss thinks that.
I love that they picked the absolute bottom-feeders of society to be on that show. Secretly, I'm rooting for Goldie.
Celebrity Fit Club
I love watching celebrities fall off their high horses. Especially when it's drug-related. And they claim it's Benadryl.
And I also love when they climb back up....go Young MC!
Dash dash dash....
Can i please please please have a weekend where I'm no longer a grownup?!?!?!?!
Monday, January 09, 2006
It's dare...
How effing awesome is this?
FREE OF THE FCC: Howard Stern making his uncensored debut on Sirius Satellite Radio Monday and denying rumors that he is married to girlfriend Beth Ostrosky. Stern also introduced George Takei as his new on-air announcer.
Anyone who listens to Howard knows about George Takei....dang now i REALLY gotta get me some Sirius...Adam Corolla is way too annoying in the morning. About time Georgey-boy got paid for the contributions he makes to Howard's show.
Ugh will add more later.
FREE OF THE FCC: Howard Stern making his uncensored debut on Sirius Satellite Radio Monday and denying rumors that he is married to girlfriend Beth Ostrosky. Stern also introduced George Takei as his new on-air announcer.
Anyone who listens to Howard knows about George Takei....dang now i REALLY gotta get me some Sirius...Adam Corolla is way too annoying in the morning. About time Georgey-boy got paid for the contributions he makes to Howard's show.
Ugh will add more later.
Sunday, January 08, 2006
Saturday, January 07, 2006
Blog me a river
Interesting something or other today...
Kraig commented that I'm more attractive/better-looking now than when we first started dating.
Which of course I had to pry and get more info on...because if I'm told I'm doing something right, I need to know specifics!!
Gasp could the extra cellulite be a turn-on?
Are the extra wrinkles more endearing?
So he said I was just more sexy (let it be known, apparently I wasn't sexy when I was 23 because I was clearly the "kid sister" type)...and when I REALLY beat him down for a response, he said:
I dunno, I think it's the hair
IT'S ALWAYS THE HAIR!!!
I swear, Henry (Henri?) is way gifted...whatever he did to my hair, it's wonderful. Not that *I* think it's all that great...personally I'm desperate to grow out the bangs and I haven't gotten used to the half hour of sleep that I no longer get in order to style it...
...but a few weeks ago a complete stranger even stopped to tell me that my hair was great.
Henry, Mr. "Drama! So who's your victim?", is fantabulous.
It appears to be that we're having a blow-drying party at my place...where he's going to finally show us how the ((bleep)) to style our hair...because we're always griping that we don't know what we're doing. Yee haw.
On another note...doesn't it surprise you when you find out the impression people first had of you?
Way back during my "homeless" stage, and I was living with my brother's friends (and they were trying to find me a boatload of Muslim guys to marry), I told the wife that the way I figure it, my brother is responsible for my mom and I'm responsible for my husband's mother. I'll look after my mom of course if necessary, but I do view it as my job to look after my (future) mother-in-law...
She was floored that I was so "traditional" like that...I guess she thought I was some modern chick who MIGHT look after her own parents, but that's it.
Recently a coworker told me that they thought I was pretty conservative when I started at my company and go figure, I'm actually not some prude uptight conservative chick. Apparently living in the OC is a qualification for being conservative...
...I live in the OC 'cause that's where my husband works...I had no idea what the OC even was when I moved here, it could have been Compton for all I knew...
It's just funny the impression people can get of someone, and sometimes they seem so shocked when they learn otherwise.
The song of the day is Heard Em Say by Kanye West
Featuring Adam Levine...
Cuz every words we swore we got more far away, and nothing's ever promised tommorow today,
And nothing lasts forever but be honest babe, it helps but it may be the only way
Kraig commented that I'm more attractive/better-looking now than when we first started dating.
Which of course I had to pry and get more info on...because if I'm told I'm doing something right, I need to know specifics!!
Gasp could the extra cellulite be a turn-on?
Are the extra wrinkles more endearing?
So he said I was just more sexy (let it be known, apparently I wasn't sexy when I was 23 because I was clearly the "kid sister" type)...and when I REALLY beat him down for a response, he said:
I dunno, I think it's the hair
IT'S ALWAYS THE HAIR!!!
I swear, Henry (Henri?) is way gifted...whatever he did to my hair, it's wonderful. Not that *I* think it's all that great...personally I'm desperate to grow out the bangs and I haven't gotten used to the half hour of sleep that I no longer get in order to style it...
...but a few weeks ago a complete stranger even stopped to tell me that my hair was great.
Henry, Mr. "Drama! So who's your victim?", is fantabulous.
It appears to be that we're having a blow-drying party at my place...where he's going to finally show us how the ((bleep)) to style our hair...because we're always griping that we don't know what we're doing. Yee haw.
On another note...doesn't it surprise you when you find out the impression people first had of you?
Way back during my "homeless" stage, and I was living with my brother's friends (and they were trying to find me a boatload of Muslim guys to marry), I told the wife that the way I figure it, my brother is responsible for my mom and I'm responsible for my husband's mother. I'll look after my mom of course if necessary, but I do view it as my job to look after my (future) mother-in-law...
She was floored that I was so "traditional" like that...I guess she thought I was some modern chick who MIGHT look after her own parents, but that's it.
Recently a coworker told me that they thought I was pretty conservative when I started at my company and go figure, I'm actually not some prude uptight conservative chick. Apparently living in the OC is a qualification for being conservative...
...I live in the OC 'cause that's where my husband works...I had no idea what the OC even was when I moved here, it could have been Compton for all I knew...
It's just funny the impression people can get of someone, and sometimes they seem so shocked when they learn otherwise.
The song of the day is Heard Em Say by Kanye West
Featuring Adam Levine...
Cuz every words we swore we got more far away, and nothing's ever promised tommorow today,
And nothing lasts forever but be honest babe, it helps but it may be the only way
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Being a Grown Up Sucks, Part N
Why being a grownup sucks...Part n....
So FINALLY I got quotes for life insurance. Going with the investment-type so that we can borrow against it as opposed to just plain term (which maybe i'll get down the road to supplement,that's cheap)...
For me to be insured for $400K: it's $244 a month.
For Kraig to be insured for $400K: it's $345 a month.
$589 extra a month. And i'll pull that out of my ass I guess.
(Okay well since it's an investment-type i'm okay reducing the amount I put in my 401K...but still!!)
What's scary is that...what if that's nto enough? I mean, yeah for NOW it would be great, but with kids, cost of living, college, crap like that...i might look back and totally think it's not enough.
Being a grownup blows goats.
In fact, it blows ALL livestock.
I remember being a kid and wanting to be grownup SOOOO badly. Really no matter what age you are, you aspire to be...around 23. You're out of school...but you can still party, waste your money, and not worry about things like retirement, homebuying, credit scores.
Once this is done, and the legal stuff is squared away (ugh gotta call the lawyer to sit down and officially sign everything...but when i do, I'll be billed the other $750, and I'm not ready for THAT charge yet)...I'll be DONE.
DONE with insurance, legal, random CRAP. Take that Smart Couples Finish Rich.
Until of course, we have kids...which will then require me to do a whole boatload of reading and learning...It's like buying a new device. You gotta figure out how exactly it works. Childcare isn't my worry...it's pregnancy that terrifies me. Whyyyy is it 9 (well, really 10) months long?! That's long ass time to have to be an incubator. That's a long time to eat healthy, avoid caffeine, not drink, not stand in front of the microwave (okay well that last one is old skool).
Speaking of devices...it used to take like 6 hours to burn a CD. Now it can get done in a minute. It used to take forever to heat up a frozen dinner...now it takes minutes. Why hasn't anyone figured out how to streamline the pregnancy process?
My fear is that 9 months will be 9 months of FREAKING OUT. I'd rather have 1 month of serious freaking out. My kid's gonna come out with 2 heads from all the anxiety hormones it's gonna get.
So today's plan for elegance and refinement: to start saying my Please and Thank Yous...not "you're awesome!" when somene does something nice for me, but rather, "thank you, I appreciate it!"....
The song of the day is Check on It by Beyonce
If I let you get up on it, you gotta make a promise
That you gone put it on me, like no ones put it on me
Don't bore me, just show me, all men talk but don't please
I can be a tease, but I really wanna please you
DAMN that's a great song...I even sat through MTV's "Making The Video" 'cause i like it so much.
So FINALLY I got quotes for life insurance. Going with the investment-type so that we can borrow against it as opposed to just plain term (which maybe i'll get down the road to supplement,that's cheap)...
For me to be insured for $400K: it's $244 a month.
For Kraig to be insured for $400K: it's $345 a month.
$589 extra a month. And i'll pull that out of my ass I guess.
(Okay well since it's an investment-type i'm okay reducing the amount I put in my 401K...but still!!)
What's scary is that...what if that's nto enough? I mean, yeah for NOW it would be great, but with kids, cost of living, college, crap like that...i might look back and totally think it's not enough.
Being a grownup blows goats.
In fact, it blows ALL livestock.
I remember being a kid and wanting to be grownup SOOOO badly. Really no matter what age you are, you aspire to be...around 23. You're out of school...but you can still party, waste your money, and not worry about things like retirement, homebuying, credit scores.
Once this is done, and the legal stuff is squared away (ugh gotta call the lawyer to sit down and officially sign everything...but when i do, I'll be billed the other $750, and I'm not ready for THAT charge yet)...I'll be DONE.
DONE with insurance, legal, random CRAP. Take that Smart Couples Finish Rich.
Until of course, we have kids...which will then require me to do a whole boatload of reading and learning...It's like buying a new device. You gotta figure out how exactly it works. Childcare isn't my worry...it's pregnancy that terrifies me. Whyyyy is it 9 (well, really 10) months long?! That's long ass time to have to be an incubator. That's a long time to eat healthy, avoid caffeine, not drink, not stand in front of the microwave (okay well that last one is old skool).
Speaking of devices...it used to take like 6 hours to burn a CD. Now it can get done in a minute. It used to take forever to heat up a frozen dinner...now it takes minutes. Why hasn't anyone figured out how to streamline the pregnancy process?
My fear is that 9 months will be 9 months of FREAKING OUT. I'd rather have 1 month of serious freaking out. My kid's gonna come out with 2 heads from all the anxiety hormones it's gonna get.
So today's plan for elegance and refinement: to start saying my Please and Thank Yous...not "you're awesome!" when somene does something nice for me, but rather, "thank you, I appreciate it!"....
The song of the day is Check on It by Beyonce
If I let you get up on it, you gotta make a promise
That you gone put it on me, like no ones put it on me
Don't bore me, just show me, all men talk but don't please
I can be a tease, but I really wanna please you
DAMN that's a great song...I even sat through MTV's "Making The Video" 'cause i like it so much.
Bitching bitching bitching blog
The working man...woman...same diff.
So one of my major beefs is how a good chunk of the workforce has to work 8-5ish type hours.
But...if you're in the service sector...WHY would you not make sure your hours cater to the other office whores who work 8-5?
Like...dentists, doctors, etc? Okay i get that those people own their own practices, but they could sleep in and work like 11-7?!
Or even just...dry cleaners, whatever.
Really what I'm beefed over is...the gym.
Their classes. There's always ONE really early class...and then maybe one or two after normal work hours (and of course, those classes are packed). ALL of the others are during the day.
WTF.
Okay let's say a huge demographic for 24HF is say...stay at home moms. How many effing classes can they possibly offer to that group of people?! For ALL the stay at home moms, do you REALLY need boatloads of classes during the week? Can't they just use normal cardio machines?!
And then after work...there's like 1 or 2 classes. To cater to...the GAZILLION super fat office whores like the rest of us who sit around eating all day. Why can't they reduce the amount of classes during the day and offer more all the way to say 10pm at night? Dont' tell me there's not as many people working out at 9pm as at say 2pm...trust me, at 9pm there's a TON of people at the gym.
it makes NO sense to me. I mean, HELLO the whole point is that some 24HF are actually open 24 hours because SOME PEOPLE REALLY DO WORK OUT LATE. And i'm not saying offer a 2am class...just not that there needs to be like a thousand during regular business hours...
If you own a frickin' business...and you're in the service industry (dry cleaning, chiropractor, oil changes, whatever)...mother effer do yourself a favor and change your hours to cater to the rest of us! At least one day a week worst case.
Geezus.
So one of my major beefs is how a good chunk of the workforce has to work 8-5ish type hours.
But...if you're in the service sector...WHY would you not make sure your hours cater to the other office whores who work 8-5?
Like...dentists, doctors, etc? Okay i get that those people own their own practices, but they could sleep in and work like 11-7?!
Or even just...dry cleaners, whatever.
Really what I'm beefed over is...the gym.
Their classes. There's always ONE really early class...and then maybe one or two after normal work hours (and of course, those classes are packed). ALL of the others are during the day.
WTF.
Okay let's say a huge demographic for 24HF is say...stay at home moms. How many effing classes can they possibly offer to that group of people?! For ALL the stay at home moms, do you REALLY need boatloads of classes during the week? Can't they just use normal cardio machines?!
And then after work...there's like 1 or 2 classes. To cater to...the GAZILLION super fat office whores like the rest of us who sit around eating all day. Why can't they reduce the amount of classes during the day and offer more all the way to say 10pm at night? Dont' tell me there's not as many people working out at 9pm as at say 2pm...trust me, at 9pm there's a TON of people at the gym.
it makes NO sense to me. I mean, HELLO the whole point is that some 24HF are actually open 24 hours because SOME PEOPLE REALLY DO WORK OUT LATE. And i'm not saying offer a 2am class...just not that there needs to be like a thousand during regular business hours...
If you own a frickin' business...and you're in the service industry (dry cleaning, chiropractor, oil changes, whatever)...mother effer do yourself a favor and change your hours to cater to the rest of us! At least one day a week worst case.
Geezus.
Monday, January 02, 2006
Out came the rain and washed the blog out
Mother
Effer.
Holy torrential downpour batman!
It's my last day off work and I was like "okay gotta go to Target to pick up some stuff"...I was gonna let a little rain stop me...
Riigghtt....
Driving back the roads were flooded....I've driven through crazy rainstorms before, that's not a problem...i've driven through INSANE snowstorms where, in hindsight, I'm amazed i'm still alive let alone didn't drive my car over the side....
But i've NEVER driven my car through floods like this, where the flooding was up to the roof of my car. I was FREAKING out, plus at one point an SUV drove by me and it's one thing when you get a downpour of water on your windshield...it was BUCKETS after BUCKETS...and I was afraid that if I slowed down TOO much, my car would never pick up momentum again...
Anyway I know, I know, I sound like a whiney little Californian bitch at this point...but I'd like to thinkthat coming from somewhere with brutal snow, I know bad mother effing driving conditions...
Moral of the story?
Kraig needs to sell his mustang so I can get an SUV...that's the lesson learned!
Effer.
Holy torrential downpour batman!
It's my last day off work and I was like "okay gotta go to Target to pick up some stuff"...I was gonna let a little rain stop me...
Riigghtt....
Driving back the roads were flooded....I've driven through crazy rainstorms before, that's not a problem...i've driven through INSANE snowstorms where, in hindsight, I'm amazed i'm still alive let alone didn't drive my car over the side....
But i've NEVER driven my car through floods like this, where the flooding was up to the roof of my car. I was FREAKING out, plus at one point an SUV drove by me and it's one thing when you get a downpour of water on your windshield...it was BUCKETS after BUCKETS...and I was afraid that if I slowed down TOO much, my car would never pick up momentum again...
Anyway I know, I know, I sound like a whiney little Californian bitch at this point...but I'd like to thinkthat coming from somewhere with brutal snow, I know bad mother effing driving conditions...
Moral of the story?
Kraig needs to sell his mustang so I can get an SUV...that's the lesson learned!
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Feelin' Squishy!
A pic from NYE....Heidi and I were "squishy"...those drinks were strong!
And go me....I won a drinking game...you try running, chugging a HUGE shot of Jose Cuervo, running back....had to swallow that sh*t after I ran back, I almost died...it was nasty!
Good times.
And go me....I won a drinking game...you try running, chugging a HUGE shot of Jose Cuervo, running back....had to swallow that sh*t after I ran back, I almost died...it was nasty!
Good times.
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